#bleach drabble

Mayuri was becoming increasingly frustrated. You could tell by the huffs, the aggressive typing, even the way he clicked his mouse. You were flitting about one of the bookshelves, but from the corner of your eye, you watched Mayuri. His mouth was turned down in a scowl. An eyebrow twitched.

Mentally, you started counting down from ten. When you hit three, his slammed his hands on the desk and slumped back in his chair, rubbing his temples.

"Pet. Here. Now." He snapped.

"Yes, master Mayuri."

You padded to him, watching as he removed his headdress and chin ornament. As soon as you were close enough, he snatched you by the waist and buried his face between your breasts. His breaths were coming in short, angry puffs. He growled softly, the sound muffled by fabric and flesh.

"Morons. Simpletons! I'm surrounded by incompetence!" Mayuri hissed, "I should make them carry around little bonsai's to help replace the oxygen they waste!"

You bit your lip to keep from smiling, gentle fingers working his shoulders. "I know, master."

"How hard is it to locate and replace my surveillance bugs!? The damn things have trackers! How stupid are these people?" Mayuri continued his tirade, directly into the valley between your breasts.

You worked your way up to his neck, gently massaging the tense muscles. "You're going to give yourself a migraine."

"Don't tell me what I already know." He mumbled back, sounding almost petulant. A sigh passed his lips and he finally started to relax. "I just need to rest my eyes before those nimrods make them explode."

You hummed softly, running your fingers into his hair and gingerly scratching his scalp. "Is this helping, master?"

Mayuri relented, nodding against your chest. "... Yes. You and your delightful breasts hardly ever disappoint me."

A giggle bubbled up your throat, soft and sweet. "I'm glad, master Mayuri."

Mayuri groaned softly, kneading your lower back like a content cat. He was unwinding, the tension slowly leaving him. Breaths calming and body beginning to melt under your touch. He reached up and unscrewed the cones covering his ear ports, tossing them onto the desk.

That was a first. Your eyebrows quirked up a touch. Mayuri never removed those unless the two of you were at home. You stared down at him, perplexed. Watched as he turned his head like he was listening to your heart. His eyes were closed, and you smiled.

Mayuri nosed softly at your breast, cheek pressed against your chest. "You and your breasts really are the least disappointing thing about my daily life." He muttered. "I should take a density test and make a pillow for myself that's the exact firmness of them. Yes."

Mayuri really was an incredible man. You kept stroking his hair and scratching his scalp. "Whatever makes you happy, master Mayuri."

He hummed, the sound reverberating through your chest. A ping from his computer made him open his eyes. He snorted softly and let his eyes close again. "Whatever it is, it can wait. I'm busy."

You smiled at that. "Busy resting your eyes?"

"Exactly."

The gentle floral scent and sway of sakura blossoms lost in the breeze fluttered down onto the engawa. Two cups of tea sat on a plate between him and shadows, outside the room of the library of his estate. He felt it then, the cold shiver that curled up one's spine even in the warmth of spring. With a voice like smooth, cold scales, colored with words that bared fangs, he approached.

Gin Ichimaru joined him on the engawa then, bringing the cup of tea to his lips, “Yer early.”

“No, Ichimaru, you are quite late. You made me swear a promise and here I sat well into the morning-” Byakuya began, his frows furrowing but the other waved a hand in nonchalant. Gin pulled out his own book, tucked somewhere into his sleeves and opened it to a page, his nimble fingers careful to not leave a crease or mark along the pages. This was their secret, their rendezvous. Here they sat, tucked away from the Seretei and obligations, lost between pages of books in the Kuchiki library.

“Gotta return this one, almost done.” Even with upturned eyes the slight fall or rise of his smile and arch of his brow told Byakuya the other was reading, finding enjoyment in the poetry. “You may keep them as long as you like. Aizen-taicho has a few of my grandfather's books still,” Byakuya spoke, uncrossing his legs to recross them into a more comfortable position as he turned a page.

“Aww don’t sour the mood with my taicho, Byakuya-kun,” Gin teased, but his words held authority. Aizen was a taboo topic in these moments, even if they began because Aizen would drag his young lieutenant with him to peruse the libraries of the Kuchiki estate. They did not stare at each other then, letting the moment fall away, blowing away into the wind with sakura blossoms and untold truths. He would never comment on it, and Gin would never elaborate on it- whatever that relationship was between him and Aizen.

“She still don’t like me, hm?” Gin curled a hand around his leg, pulling his knee close as he looked behind him, into the dark room of the library past the doorway. The shuffle of soft feet along the floorboards grew fainter as his smile grew wider.

“Don’t tease her, Ichimaru.”

“Whatcha gonna do about it?”

A hint of smile began to curl on his own face, a childish rise to challenge Gin brought out in him. His own reiatsu grew, petals curling against snake skin, a warm spring breeze against a reptilian chill. Yet still, in silence they sat, testing and teasing each other as they turned the pages of the books. Gin yawned after some time, setting the book aside and stretching his arms up, “I better get back to Izuru, I am sure he’s worried.” Byakuya watched as the man stood, holding out the book to him. He took it, their fingers brushing for less than a moment, “I don’t need to check out another Byakuya-kun. Thanks for the offer.”

His brows furrowed momentarily, the confusion evident but Gin smiled down at him with a sense of finality that sent a shiver down his spine. He would not make a remark, he would honor a man's conviction even if it meant these moments would be no more. They did not say goodbye as Gin slithered off back to his division, they did not say anything. Byakuya just turned one more page in the book and his eyes fell upon a poem-

More than I can bear, past the hour of the snake,

The hour of the horse is All the more sad;

Love is like a sheep

Steps to the slaughter…

Squad 4 was supposed to be a safe choice. You had asked to be put in it for a reason when you graduated. Far, far away from the fighting and pain. No conflict. Just helping people, healing injuries and staying inside where there were no battles. You would take any amount of scut work over whatever the hell those other divisions got up to. And you were good at your job. You handled medical emergencies well, you were a boss at getting through paperwork. Lieutenant Isane would cry tears of joy at the sight of you almost daily since you were singlehandedly keeping the admin side of the division afloat on your own.

So why did it have to come to this?

After what seemed like an eternity, the wooden door cracked open with a deafening sound and a head poked through it. The Shinigami’s eyes scanned the crowd outside until they fell on you. You felt your throat knot. He gestured for you to come to him before disappearing behind the door again.

You stood up on shaky legs, deliberately trying not to look at everyone around you who was now staring at you with pity in their eyes, no doubt. You unintentionally caught eyes with Captain Kuchiki, a calm slate gray that seemed to settle your nerves just a bit. He gave you an almost imperceptible nod, and some strength returned to your legs. You were grateful he was there, despite him not having any involvement in the situation.

Well, it was his Lieutenant on the line so maybe some involvement.

The Shinigami led you down a long hallway silently, your almost numb legs following behind. You felt like a baby deer with how unsteady you were. What were baby deers called again? Foals? You had no clue. Your mind was fried at this point. You tried to send a short prayer to the gods above, but then you remembered they were the ones who put you here in the first place so maybe praying to them wouldn’t be too good of an idea.

The Captain Commander certainly had an air about him. The table he sat behind in his office made him look grand. The office was almost like a balcony, overlooking a magnificent view of the Seireitei that you would have loved to admire under less precarious circumstances. You kept your eyes on the desk he was seated at, bowing low and standing straight as a rod until the Shinigami who brought you there had shut the door behind him with a click that echoed in your very soul. Then, it was silent.

Yamamoto Genryuusai was looking at you with a hard stare. You felt the horrifyingly embarrassing urge to burst into tears.

“Explain.” He said.

What came next was the worst word vomit known to mankind.

It had started two days ago, as festivities for New Years were just beginning to unravel. You had been on night duty, a post you wouldn't wish on anyone. Holidays almost always ended up with someone landing in the Squad 4 barracks with injuries. A bunch of drunk soldiers with weapons and the ability to fight felt like a disaster waiting to happen. But what happened next was ten times worse than what anyone was anticipating.

The fight was pretty standard. Some drunk Squad 3 member had thought it would be a good idea to taunt Squad 11 members by calling them brainless idiots who only knew how to swing a sword. It was a fist fight that escalated when Yumichika and Ikkaku stepped in. Somewhere in the commotion, someone had broken a bottle of sake on Yumichika’s face.

This, of course, caused a complete meltdown on Yumichika’s part, who could feel the cuts on his face that would potentially leave scars. He lost his shit and proceeded to beat the crap out of everyone around him. A very, very drunk Ikkaku and accompanying Renji thought that was the best solution in their alcohol-addled minds. The rest was history.

What had landed into Squad 4 was over 20 extremely injured Shinigami, a flurry of broken limbs and blood. The biggest issue was that this had involved a Lieutenant and two seated officers. Once Captain Unohana got wind of it, it was all over. This kind of violence wouldn't fly under the strict Captain’s nose, and she had reported the whole matter to the Captain Commander. That immediately put Captain Zaraki and Captain Kuchiki’s asses on the line since it was their officers involved, and since you had been the attending who received every case in Squad 4, you were asked to report to the Captain Commander for a full explanation on the matter the following morning.

That morning, extremely hungover Ikkaku and Yumichika had shown up at your barracks, pleading with you to save them. Apparently their Captains had been furious, and both of them were being considered for a major demotion. And Renji? Lord, Captain Kuchiki would make sure Renji never saw the light of day again.

While you made them tea to try and stave off their headaches, Yumichika had given you an honest recounting of the whole situation, and it made your heart soften. They really had just been there to break apart a fight before Yumichika’s face got involved. And as you looked at his bandaged face, knowing full well the extent of the damage underneath, (you had been the one to heal him after all) you felt your heart swell in pity.

So you had agreed to the impossible task of trying to make them appear like the victims in this situation. In front of the fucking Captain Commander. What were you thinking? Curse your empathy and curse the fact that you had somehow befriended these people.

“So according to you, Fifth seat Ayasegawa was there to break up the fight?” Captain Commander Yamamoto’s voice was grumbly and low.

You nodded. A drop of sweat rolled down the side of your face and you were breathing hard. You twisted your fingers behind your back, jaw locked so tight it made your teeth hurt.

“You realize he was singlehandedly responsible for incapacitating 11 out of the 20 injured men?”

You closed your eyes. Fucking Yumichika. That fucker.

“He only responded to an extremely hateful and violent attack on himself, sir. He was not the instigator. As the healer who received him in Squad 4 barracks, I can guarantee that his condition was horrifying.”

“So you agree with his decision to retaliate the way he did?”

You shook your head immediately. “No, sir. I do not agree with it, but in the uh, inebriated state everyone was in at the time, including the sight of his comrades injured and charged comments against his Squad, I can understand why he acted the way he did.”

The Captain Commander appraised you under a weighted stare which made you gulp heavily.

“You have an admirable track record, Sixth Seat Y/L/N.”

What? You blinked, not knowing how to respond. He knew about you. Well, of fucking course he did. He couldn't have summoned you here with no knowledge of who you were. But being referred to by him unnerved you.

“Your account for the event of New Years Eve is very diplomatic.” He continued. “If I go off on what you have told me, I am left with no one to blame this whole situation on. It seems this will just be written off as an unfortunate accident.”

You nearly bawled.

The Captain General closed the file in front of him, leaning back and placing his chin on his bony knuckles. His eyes fell shut, yet you felt he was closely watching your every move.

“You may leave. And inform everyone that they will receive a written warning for their involvement. You will receive a letter too, but of a different nature.”

You nodded and bowed instantly, turning around to walk out of the office. When the door shut behind you, you choked on a gasp and keeled forward, resting your hands on shaky knees. Fuck. Fuck. That was so intense you could cry. You would cry, actually. The tears were coming on. You sniffled.

Someone cleared their throat and your head shot up, looking at the Shinigami who had led you here. He gave you a look that told you he knew how you felt, before gesturing you to follow him out.

On numb, trembling legs, you walked out of the Squad 1 barracks, immediately being greeted by all the parties in question. Ikkaku,Yumichika and Renji crowded you, looking at you with hopeful eyes. You looked at the half bandaged and swollen faces in front of you and felt the horrifying urge to laugh.

“You all will get an official warning. No lasting consequences.” You managed to choke out.

The air that lifted at your words left behind an atmosphere so light it nearly made you collapse, you swayed a little as you sat down on the bench, watching Renji collapse in relief while Yumichika slumped into a wooden pillar. Ikkaku was looking up at the sky like he had just received redemption from the gods themselves. You held back more laughter.

Captain Zaraki let out a heavy sigh and stretched, patting you on the head with a heavy hand in his show of thanks before shuffling off, hands deep in his pockets. Captain Kuchiki sat next to you on the bench smoothly, staring at his Lieutenant with disdain.

“I must thank you.” He said, not looking at you. “I was convinced this would end poorly. You have surprised me, Sixth Seat Y/L/N. And I assume you surprised the Captain General too. I have not known him to be lenient in the years I have worked in the Gotei 13.”

You stared at the Captain as he got up once again, each move as pristine as the last. He walked over to Renji and let out a pained breath at the sight of his Lieutenant.

“Stand, Renji. You will still face the punishment I have set for you.” He stated simply before turning to walk away.

“Yes, Captain.” Renji’s voice was small and muffled. The corner of your lip twitched.

Yumichika sidled over to where you sat, tears in his one visible eye.

“I love you.” He breathed, making you snort.

“I want you to stay as far away from me as possible from now on.” You stood up, feeling better now after seeing the relief your friends felt. You were of course, being dramatic. But you were sincerely so drained you wouldn’t mind sleeping for a week.

And sleep you did. In fact, you had completely forgotten the Captain General’s words until the next morning, when a Shinigami showed up at your barracks with a letter in his hand. You stared at it in confusion until you saw the name of the addressor on the envelope. Your eyes widened and your heart fell out of your ass as you remembered the words.

“You will receive a letter too, but of a different nature.”

With trembling fingers, you tore through the paper, frantic eyes trying to make sense of what you were reading. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“What the fuck is a Human Resources Department?”