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đŹđ˛đ§đ¨đŠđŹđ˘đŹ; Hoseok's thumb traces your jawline and it is absolutely, categorically not a medical procedure. He knows it. You know it. The surveillance camera that definitely isn't in this room knows it. Three encounters. Three escalations. One gang rule that says this gets you killed. He tells you to leave. You leave. You come back. He breaks.
đŠđđ˘đŤđ˘đ§đ ; jung hoseok x nb!reader
đ đđ§đŤđ; crime/mafia au (kkangpae), forbidden romance, smut
đ°đđŤđ§đ˘đ§đ đŹ; explicit sexual content, piv sex (unprotected but they're tested and theyâre on birth control don't @ me), teasing, edging, orgasm denial / orgasm control, cum on skin, wrist pinning, light restraint, praise kink, hand-holding during sex (the real killer), size mention, aftercare, injury depiction (split lip, rib bruising, blood that isn't his), medical setting, references to past addiction (alcohol, non-glorified), forbidden relationship dynamics, rule-breaking with real consequences, post-emergency emotional vulnerability, raw confessions, crying-adjacent energy from a man in bloody scrubs at 2 AM, the word âdarlingâ used as a weapon of mass destruction.
đ/đ§; HELLO HELLO HELLO we are SO back in the Kkangpae Universe babyyyyy đĽđŠš This one's another commission from the one and only @billy-jeans23 (Roo my beloved, my patron of unhinged gang AUs, the reason I have not known peace since KGP!Hoseok was created)âand if you thought the LAST installment was bad for your health, I need you to sit down. Grab water. Maybe a pillow to scream into. I'm not responsible for damages. So!! Quick rundown for the new girlies, gays, and non-binary baes stumbling in: Kkangpae is an AU universeâthink organized crime meets found family meets 'the ONE rule is no falling in love and guess what these two idiots did'. The whole thing is built from the ground up with its own lore, hierarchy, divisions, aura system, the works. It's a whole world in here and I am simply a tenant. You can check the main story (jungkook x female!reader) here. Reader uses they/them pronouns and is heavily implied blasian. This chapter is essentially three escalations: the late-night exam where his thumb does something DEEPLY non-medical, the storage room 'audit' where they almost kiss surrounded by expired surgical equipment (romantic), and the 2 AM office scene where twenty hours of no sleep and someone else's blood finally dissolves whatever was left of this man's resolve. I wrote this in a feral haze and I regret nothing.
Rooâthis one's for you. Again. As always. You keep commissioning these and I keep losing years off my life writing them. Fair trade. đ
Enjoy, don't perceive me, and please yell at me in the comments because I WILL be refreshing. đŤĄ
The mission wasnât supposed to leave marks.
But here you are anyway, perched on the examination table in the medical wing at half past eleven, watching Hoseokâs jaw tick as he catalogs the damage.Â
Late shift means itâs just the two of youâthe night nurse dismissed with a curt wave after one look at your split lip and the bruising blooming across your ribs.
âTraining accident,â youâd said.
He hadnât believed you.
But it doesnât matterâit never does, because heâs still going to fix it.
When itâs you, heâs always going to fix it.
His hands are cold when they press against your ribs, efficient, therapeutic even. Youâre not wearing a shirtâditched it the moment he told you to, because modesty is stupid when someoneâs checking for internal bleedingâand the sterile air makes goosebumps rise across your skin.
Or maybe thatâs just him.
âBreathe in.â
You do.
âOut.â
The exhale hurts less than it should. Nothingâs broken, probably. Youâve had broken ribs beforeâthis is just spectacular bruising and your bodyâs usual bullshit of marking too easily.
âYouâre lucky,â Hoseok mutters, fingers tracing the edge of the bruise with a touch thatâs gentler than his voice. âAnother inch to the left and weâd be talking punctured lung.â
âBut weâre not.â
âBut weâre not,â he agrees, and his hand is still there, palm flat against your ribs, thumb resting just below your breast.
He hasnât moved it.
You swallow and watch his faceâthe way his eyes track across your skin like heâs reading something written in the violence. Thereâs a crease between his eyebrows that only shows up when heâs worried, and itâs definitely there now.
âIâm fine, doc.â
âYou came back bleeding.â
âBarely.â
âBleeding is bleeding.â His voice drops lower, rough around the edges. âAnd youâyou do this too often, Trouble.â
Itâs not an accusation.Â
It sounds more like something else, something heâs not supposed to say.
âHazard of the job,â you say lightly, testing the waters. âGood thing I have such an attentive physician.â
His eyes flick up to yours.
Oh.
Yeah, he caught that.
The air between you shiftsânot much, just enough to notice. Like the moment before lightning strikes when your hair stands on end and you know somethingâs about to change.
Hoseokâs hand is still on your ribs.
Youâre very aware of this fact.
âYour lip,â he says finally, pulling back to grab supplies, and you canât (or donât want to) explain why the loss of contact feels like cold water. âThat needs cleaning.â
He comes closer again, now standing between your knees where they dangle off the tableâs edge, and you have to tilt your head back slightly to maintain eye contact.Â
This is normal, just your usual medical procedure. Youâve done this a hundred times.
But, somehow, today it feels different.Â
The antiseptic stings when he dabs it across your split lip, and you hiss.
âHold still.â
âTrying.â
âTry harder.â
His free hand comes up to cup your jaw, thumb resting against your cheek to keep your head steady, andâ
Fuck.
You blink.Â
His thumb moves, just slightly, a tiny stroke across your cheekbone that could be accidental.
Except you can see his face and thereâs nothing accidental about the way heâs looking at you right now.
âHoseokââ
âShh.â The cotton swab moves to the corner of your mouth, careful and meticulous. âAlmost done.â
But his hand doesnât leave your face.
You can smell him from hereâsandalwood and something clean, antiseptic mixing with cologne in a way that shouldnât work but does.Â
Itâs grounding. Safe. The kind of scent that makes you want to lean in andâ
Bad idea.
Terrible idea.
âThere.â He sets down the supplies but his hand is still on your face, and now his thumb traces your jawline in a touch thatâs definitely, absolutely not medical. âYou should be more careful.â
âWhereâs the fun in that?â
âFun.â He huffs something that might be a laugh except it sounds pained. âYouâre going to give me a heart attack one of these days, pip.â
The usual nickname lands soft, intimate.
Too intimate.
You watch something complicated cross his expressionâwant and restraint tangled up so tight you canât tell where one ends and the other begins.Â
His thumb is still moving against your jaw, this slow back-and-forth thatâs making it hard to think about anything except how easy it would be to close the distance between you.
How easy and how stupid.
âWe shouldnât,â he says quietly.
He doesnât move his hand.
âShouldnât what?â Your voice comes out a tad more brittle than intended.
His eyes drop to your mouthâjust for a second, but you catch itâbefore snapping back up.
âYou know what.â
Yeah.
You do.
âThen why are you still touching me?â
The question hangs there, dangerous and honest, and you watch him process it.Â
Watch the muscle in his jaw jump.Â
Watch his hand finally, finally drop away from your face like youâve burned him.
âGet dressed.â His voice is back to professional, clipped and distant. âYouâre cleared for light duty. Nothing strenuous for seventy-two hours.â
âHoseokââ
âIâll update your file.â Heâs already moving away, putting space between you like distance will fix whatever just almost happened. âTry not to get hit in the next week. Your body needs time to heal.â
You slide off the table, grabbing your shirt from the chair.Â
The fabric slides over your head and you catch it thenâsandalwood clinging to your skin where his hands had been, mixing with your own cherry cordial in a way that makes your chest tight.
Heâs at his desk now, back turned, typing something into the computer with a focus youâd say is forced.
You should leave.
Youâre going to leave.
âGoodnight, Hoseok.â
A pause.
Then, so quiet you almost miss it: âGoodnight.â
You make it all the way back to your quarters before you realize you can still smell him on your skin.
Just as much as you notice the ache in your ribs has nothing to do with the bruising.
The inventory request comes three days later.
âMedical storage room. 1400 hours. Need your dual-division expertise for equipment categorization.â
Itâs bullshit, obviously.
The medical wing doesnât need a Cyber-Seduction hybrid to organize bandages.Â
But itâs plausible enough that no one will question it, and thatâs probably the point.
You show up at two on the dot.
The storage room is tucked in the back corner of the medical wingâone of those spaces thatâs technically on the floor plan but rarely used except for overflow supplies and equipment too expensive to leave in the main inventory. Itâs cramped and windowless, lit by flickering fluorescents that make everything look slightly jaundiced.
Hoseokâs already there, standing among half-unpacked boxes with a tablet in hand and tension in every line of his body.
âHey.â
He looks up, and something in his expression cracks before smoothing over into professional neutrality.
âThanks for coming. This shouldnât take long.â
Liar.
You step inside and let the door click shut behind you.
The tension from three nights ago hasnât dissipated, makes the air feel different right upon entryâthicker, charged.Â
Heâs wearing his usual turtleneck under the white coat, and you know if you got close enough youâd smell sandalwood.
Youâre not getting close.
Youâre absolutely getting close.
âWhat am I looking at?â You move toward the nearest box, and the space forces you into proximity.
The storage room isnât big enough for two people to maintain distance.
âEquipment audit.â His voice is steady but thereâs an undercurrent you recognize now. âNeed to cross-reference inventory codes with the digital system. Some items are still under old classifications.â
âAnd you need Cyber for this becauseâŚ?â
âBecause the database is a mess and youâre better at pattern recognition than my staff.â
Valid reason.
Still bullshit.
You pull out your phone, opening the relevant database while he shuffles closer with the tablet.Â
His arm brushes yoursâbrief contact, could be accidentalâand you watch his jaw tighten.
Not accidental.
âOkay, so what am Iââ
His hand settles on your lower back.
Just rests there, warm through your shirt, like it belongs.
You forget how to finish the sentence.
âThis batch,â he says, voice dropping lower as he leans in to point at something on your screen. His chest is almost against your shoulder now, and you can feel the heat of him. âCross-reference with storage codes 4000 through 4200.â
âRight. Yeah. Thatâsââ You struggle to focus on the numbers. His hand hasnât moved from your back. âThatâs a lot of entries.â
âNarrow it down by date acquired. Anything older than two years is getting cycled out.â
You should step away.
And yet, neither of you moves.
Your fingers input the search parameters, but you canât shake off your head how his hand remains on your back, how his arm is pressed against yours, how his breath ghosts across your temple when he shifts to see the screen better.
âThere.â Your voice sounds foreign. âForty-three items flagged.â
âGood.â But he doesnât pull away to look at his tablet. Doesnât create distance. âWhat about subcategory medical-grade diagnostics?â
âHoseok.â
âHmm?â
âWhat are we doing?â
The question sits between you, heavy and unavoidable.
His hand flexes against your backânot pulling away, but pressing in slightly, like heâs grounding himself with the contact.
âInventory,â he says, but thereâs no conviction in it.
âRight. Inventory.â
You turn to face him, which is a mistake because now youâre chest to chest in this tiny room and his hand has slid around to your hip and you can see the exact moment his control starts to fracture.
He doesnât step back.
Neither do you.
âI want you,â you say quietly, letting your Seduction training color your voiceâsoft and deliberate and devastating. âYouâre aware of that, right?â
His breath catches audibly.
âDonâtââ
âDonât what?â You tilt your head slightly, studying his face. âDonât tell you the truth?â
âDonât make this impossible.â
âIt already is.â You shift closerânot much, just enough that your bodies touch. âHas been for weeks.â
His hand tightens on your hip. The other comes up to grip the edge of the shelf beside your head, like he needs something to hold onto.
âWe canât.â
âSo you keep saying.â You let your fingers trail up his chest, feeling his heart hammering beneath the turtleneck. âBut youâre still touching me.â
âI shouldnât be.â
âBut you are.â
His jaw clenches, and you watch him fight with himselfârestraint versus want, professionalism versus the very obvious desire written all over his face.
You lean in, slowly, giving him the chance to step back but he doesnât, until your mouth is a breath away from his.Â
Not touching.Â
Just close enough that he can feel the ghost of it, the promise of what could happen if either of you closed that final distance.
âYou want me?â Your breath ghosts across his lips.Â
The sound he makes is somewhere between a groan and a curse.
âYouâreââ His voice is wrecked. âYouâre playing a dangerous game, pip.â
âHmm?â You let your nose brush against his, feather-light. âAm I winning?â
âFuck.â
His free hand comes up to cup your face, and for a second you think heâs going to close the distance, going to kiss you and damn the consequencesâ
He doesnât.
Just holds you there, thumb stroking your cheekbone, forehead almost touching yours, breathing hard like heâs just run a marathon.
âLook at you,â he mutters, and his voice has gone rough and low. âSo tempting. Soâgod, youâre making it so hard to resist.â
âMaybe I donât want you to.â
âYou donât know what youâre asking for.â
âDonât I?â
Your lips are still barely a breath apart.Â
You can feel the heat of him, smell sandalwood mixing with your cherry cordial until the air is thick with it.Â
Can see the exact moment his control starts to splinter.
âI couldââ He cuts himself off, jaw clenching. âIf I started, I donât think I could stop.â
âGood.â
âThatâs notâwe canâtââ
âCanât?â
You shift just slightly, and your body presses against his.Â
The contact makes him inhale sharply.Â
âOr shouldnât?â
âBoth.â But his hand slides from your hip to the small of your back, pulling you flush against him, and you can feel exactly how much he wants this. âDefinitely both.â
âLiar.â
He makes a sound thatâs almost a laugh.
âYouâre dangerous.â
âSays the man with his hands all over me.â
âI should let go.â
âShould you?â
But neither of you moves.
Youâre pressed together nowâchest to chest, his thigh between yoursâand you can feel his heartbeat racing to match your own.Â
Can feel the way his fingers flex against your back like heâs fighting not to grab you harder.
âTell me to stop,â you whisper, breath ghosting across his lips.Â
âIââ His voice cracks. âPipââ
âTell me you donât want this.â
He canât.
You both know he canât.
His thumb traces your bottom lipânot quite touching, just the barest suggestion of contactâand his eyes are so dark you can barely see brown anymore.
âYou have no ideaââ He swallows hard. ââhow badly I want toââ
Footsteps in the corridor outside.
You both freeze.
The moment shatters.
Hoseokâs hands drop from your body like youâve burned him, and he steps back so fast he nearly hits the shelf behind him.Â
Puts three feet of space between you that feels like a chasm.
The footsteps pass by.
Keep going.
Fade.
âThis canât happen,â he says, and his voice is ragged. âWeâthis canâtââ
âHoseokââ
âNo.â He runs a hand through his hair, destroying the careful styling. âWe canât do this. Itâsâthe rules exist for a reason, and I canâtâI wonâtââ
âYou wonât what?â
âRuin you.â The words come out fierce. âI wonât be the reason you get hurt.â
You stare at himâat the wild look in his eyes, the heaving chest, the white-knuckled grip he has on the shelf behind him like itâs the only thing keeping him upright.
âWhat if Iâm willing to risk it?â
âWell Iâm not.â But his voice cracks on the words. âI canâtâyou need to go.â
âThe inventoryââ
âFuck the inventory.â He wonât look at you now. âJust go. Please.â
You should argue.
Should push.
But something in his voice stops youâdesperation mixed with genuine fear, like heâs hanging on by a thread.
âOkay,â you say quietly. âOkay.â
You head for the door.
Your handâs on the handle when his voice stops you.
âWait.â
You turn back.
Heâs still standing there, gripping that shelf, looking completely wrecked.
âDonâtââ He swallows hard. âDonât think this means I donâtâthat Iâm notââ
âI know.â
You do know.
Thatâs what makes it worse.
You leave before either of you can make this any harder.
But three hours later, sitting in your quarters, you catch sandalwood on your shirt and know heâs probably dealing with cherry cordial on his coat.
The almost is becoming unbearable.
Somethingâs going to break soon.
Itâs past two in the morning.
You shouldnât be here.
You came anyway.
The medical wing opens up ahead after the elevator doors, and you can smell blood and antiseptic in the air.Â
That distinctive scent of wounds being cleaned up, of emergency protocols activated, of Hoseok running damage control on something that went very wrong.
The main treatment area is empty now, recently sanitized, but there are signs of chaos everywhereâdiscarded medical supplies not yet cleared away, monitoring equipment still beeping softly, disorder that only happens when people are fighting to save lives and canât be bothered with tidiness.
You find him in his office.
Heâs standing at the window with his back to the door, still wearing his surgical scrubs under the white coat.Â
Thereâs blood on his sleevesânot his, you know, never hisâand his shoulders carry the kind of tension that speaks to hours of adrenaline finally crashing.
âHoseok?â
He doesnât turn around.
âYou should be asleep.â
âSo should you.â
âIâm working.â
âYouâre standing in the dark staring at nothing.â
His jaw tightensâyou can see it in profileâbut he doesnât argue.
You step inside and let the door close softly behind you.Â
The office is dim, lit only by the glow from the medical wing beyond and the city lights filtering through the window.Â
It evokes a sense of disconnect from reality, like youâve both stepped outside normal time where rules donât apply.Â
âWas it bad?â
âItâs always bad.â His voice is caustic, scraped raw. âBut yeah. It was bad.â
You move closer, laggy and chary like he might bolt if you make sudden movements.Â
âEmergency?â
âYeah.â
âAre theyââ
âStable. For now.âÂ
He finally turns to look at you, and the exhaustion in his face makes your chest hurt. There are shadows under his eyes, tension in every line of his body, and his hands are shaking slightly.Â
âWhat are you doing here, pip?â
âChecking on you.â
âIâm fine.â
âLiar.â
Something flickers across his expressionâfrustration or maybe relief that someone sees through his bullshit.
âGo back to your quarters, pip. Iâm notâI donât have the energy for this right now.â
âFor what?â
âFor pretending.â The admission comes out harsh. âFor acting like Iâm notâlike weâre notââ
He cuts himself off, jaw clenching.
You take another step closer.
âHow long have you been awake?â
âI donât know. Twenty hours? More?â He rubs his eyes. âLost count somewhere around the third transfusion.â
âYou need to rest.â
âI needââ His voice splinters. âI donât know what I need.â
Liar.
You both know what he needs.
âHoseokââ
âDonât.â He holds up a hand like heâs physically stopping you. âDonâtâI canâtâmy control is shot to hell right now and if youââ
âIf I what?â
His eyes meet yours, and thereâs something wild in them.Â
Desperate.
âIf you keep looking at me like that, Iâm going to do something we canât take back.â
Your heart hammers.
âMaybe I want you to.â
âFuck.â The word comes out broken. âDonât say that. DonâtâIâm trying to do the right thing here and youâre making it impossible.â
âThe right thing,â you close the remaining distance between you, âis standing here alone in the dark, falling apart, because god forbid you let someone care about you?â
âThatâs notââ
âYou were scared tonight.â Itâs not a question. âI can see it all over you.â
His expression fractures.
âYeah,â he admits quietly. âYeah, I was fucking terrified. And I canâtâIâm so tired of being scared. Of pretending I donâtâthat you donâtââ
He doesnât finish.
Doesnât need to.
âWe shouldnât,â he says, but it sounds hollow now. Defeated.
âI know.â
âThe rules exist for a reason.â
âI know that too.â
Neither of you moves away.
The office is so quiet you can hear both your breathingâhis ragged and uneven, yours picking up speed to match.Â
Can smell sandalwood and antiseptic and underneath it something raw and honest that youâve never caught before.
Fear.
Want.
Surrender.
âIf we do thisââ His voice drops to almost nothing. âIf Iâthereâs no going back, pip.â
âI donât want to go back.â
He makes a sound thatâs half-laugh, half-breaking.
âIâm serious.â
âGood.â
Thatâs what does it.
That single word that cracks whateverâs left of his restraint, and then heâs crossing the space between you and his mouth is on yours and itâs nothing like the almost-moments before.
This is desperate.
This is surrender.
His hands cup your face like youâre something precious, and he kisses you like heâs drowning and youâre air.Â
Thereâs no gentleness, no careful testingâjust need poured into the contact, weeks of wanting finally given permission to exist.
You kiss him back just as hard, fisting your hands in his bloody scrubs, and he groans against your mouth.
The sound goes straight through you.
âFuck,â he breathes between kisses. âFuck, Iâve wantedâso longââ
âYeah,â you manage. âMe too.â
His hands slide down to your waist, pulling you flush against him, and you can feel how much he wants this. Can feel him hard against your hip, can feel the way his hands shake when they touch you.
âTell meââ He pulls back just enough to look at you, pupils blown wide. âTell me you want this. I need to hear you say it.â
âI want this.â You meet his eyes. âWant you. Please.â
The âpleaseâ breaks something in him.
He walks you backward toward the examination table in the corner of his officeâthe one he keeps for quick checks, private assessmentsâand lifts you onto it with an ease that makes heat pool low in your stomach.
âIf weâre doing thisââ His voice is wrecked. âIf Iâmâgod, I canât believe Iâmââ
You pull him between your legs, and his words cut off in a groan.
âHoseok.â Your hands find the hem of his scrub top. âStop thinking.â
âCanât.â But heâs already helping you pull it off, revealing skin and muscle and the kind of body youâve imagined too many times to count. âThis isâweâre in the medical wing. Anyone couldââ
âNo oneâs here.â You trace your fingers down his chest, watching his abs contract. âJust us.â
âJust us,â he repeats, and something about the way he says it sounds like he needed the reassurance.
His hands find the hem of your shirt, and he pauses.
âCan Iââ
âYes.â
He strips it off you, then your pants, slowly but surely, until youâre sitting on his examination table in just your underwear and heâs looking at you like youâve destroyed him.
âLook at you,â he breathes. âSo perfect. SoâI don't deserve this.â
âShut up.â
He almost smiles.
Then his hands are on youâsliding up your thighs, over your hips, ghosting across your ribs with a touch thatâs way too honest and way too imbued in want.Â
And when his thumbs finally brush the underside of your breasts, you arch into it.
âSensitive,â he murmurs, taking inventory of your responses like theyâre precious. âGood to know.â
âHoseokââ
âShh.â His mouth finds your neck, kissing and biting a path to your shoulder. âIâm taking care of you.â
And he is.
His hands map every inch of exposed skin while his mouth works your neck, finding the spots that make you gasp, that make your fingers dig into his shoulders.Â
When his thumb brushes over your nipple through the fabric of your bra, you make a sound thatâs almost embarrassing.
He does it again just to hear it.
âYou sound so pretty,â he says against your skin. âGoing to sound even prettier when I make you cum.â
The words send heat straight between your legs.
âConfident.â
âIâm very good at my job.â He palms your breast properly now, and you arch into his hand. âAnd right now, my job is making you feel good.â
Your bra comes off next, and then his mouth is on youâtongue circling your nipple before sucking it into his mouthâand your head falls back with a moan.
âThatâs it,â he encourages, switching to the other side. âLet me hear you.â
His free hand slides between your thighs, pressing against the damp fabric there, and he groans.
âFuck, youâre so wet already.â
âYour fault.â
âYeah.â He sounds devastated by it. âYeah, it is.â
Your underwear joins the growing pile of clothes, and then his fingers are where you need them mostâsliding through wetness, finding your clit with relative easeâwhich honestly speaks to medical knowledge put to very unprofessional use.
The first touch, inevitably, makes you jolt.
âEasy,â he soothes, circling slowly. âIâve got you.â
He does.
His fingers work you with careful attention, reading every single one of your tiny reactions to figure out exactly what you need.Â
Then he slides one inside you, and your hips buck.
âMore?â
âYesâpleaseââ
He adds a second finger, curling them just right, and the sensation makes you gasp.Â
His thumb stays on your clit, circling in maddening patterns while his fingers work inside you.
âThatâs it,â he murmurs. âTake it. Youâre doing so well for me, pip. Good darling.â
The praise mixed with the physical sensation is simply overwhelming, so much so that you can feel yourself getting close, that tension building low in your bellyâ
He stops.
âWhatââ
âNot yet, darling.â His voice is rough but controlled. âNot until I say.â
âHoseokââ
âTrust me.â He kisses you, slow and deep, fingers still inside you but not moving. âItâll be better. I promise.â
You believe him.
He starts anewâslower this time, building you up slowly once more. Kissing you, letting you get near the precipice again before heâs stopping his motions.
âPlease,â you finally break. âPlease, I needââ
âI know what you need.â His free hand cups your face. âBut weâre not there yet.â
He pulls his fingers out, and you actually whimper at the loss.
Then heâs stripping off his remaining clothes, and you get your first look at him fully naked andâ
Fuck.
Heâs beautiful. Heâs breathtakingly beautiful, all golden glistening skin, and his cock is hard and flushed and exactly as perfect as the rest of him.
âLike what you see?â
âShut up.â
He grinsâthe first real smile youâve seen all nightâand pulls you to the edge of the table.
Then he pauses.
âI donâtâshit, I donât have anything here.â His jaw clenches in frustration as he looks over the area. âThe condoms are in the main supply closet and Iâm notâI canâtââ
âIâm on birth control,â you say. âAnd Iâm clean, remember? Last medical check included testing.â
âIâm clean too.â His voice drops. âBut if youâre not comfortableââ
âI want you.â You meet his eyes. âLike this. Please.â
He groans.
âYouâre so unfair.â
âGood thing you like it.â
His laugh is breathless.
Then heâs lining himself up, the head of his cock pressing against you, andâ
âWait.â He leans his forehead against yours. âYou okay with this? Really?â
âYes.â You wrap your legs around his waist, look into his eyes. âYes, I am. Please, fuck me.â
He doesnât need to be told twice.
The first press inside is patient, giving you time to adjust.Â
Heâs bigger than his fingers, stretching you in a way that borders on too much, and you watch his face the entire timeâthe way his expression goes slack with pleasure, the way his breath comes in short gasps.
âGood?â he grits out.
You nod quietly, watching the way he sinks in.Â
âSo good. More.â
He indulges, inch by agonizing inch, until heâs fully seated inside you and youâre both breathing hard.
âFuck,â he breathes. âYou feelâI canâtâso perfectââ
âMove, please.â
And moving, he does.Â
Itâs slow at first, careful, but you can see him struggling to maintain control.Â
His hands grip your hips hard enough to bruise, and when you clench around him, he makes a sound thatâs almost pained.
âYouâreâdonât do thatâtrying to last hereââ
âDonât want you to last,â you manage. âWant you to lose it.â
âFuck.â
The next thrust is harder, deeper, and you cry out at the sensation.Â
âThatâs it,â he encourages. âTake it. Youâre taking me so well, darling.â
Your hands scramble for purchase on his shoulders as he fucks you meaner now, each thrust sending sparks through your nervous system.Â
The examination table creaks under you, and somewhere in the back of your mind you remember youâre in his office, in the medical wing, where anyone could walk inâ
It just makes it hotter.
âLay back,â he says suddenly.
You do, and he follows you down, bracing himself on his hands beside your head. This position is differentâmore intimate, nowhere to hide as he looks down at you.
âGive me your hands.â
You lift them, and he pins your wrists to the table above your head. Holds you there while he thrusts into you, and the feeling of being pinned, being held, being completely at his mercyâ
âOh godââ
âYeah.â His voice is wrecked. âYou like that? Like me holding you down?â
âYesâfuckâyesââ
His fingers lace through yours, and somehow thatâs even more intimate than the sex itself.
Holding hands while he fucks you, faces inches apart, breathing the same air.
âIâve wanted this,â he confesses, words spilling out unchecked. âWanted you. So long. Every time you came to medical, every time you smiled at me, every time you called me those ridiculous nicknamesââ
âHoseokââ
âYouâre so addictive.â He leans down to bite your shoulder, not gentle, and you gasp. âCanât get enough. Never going to get enough.â
The devotional quality in his voice, the raw honestyâitâs intoxicating.
Your cherry cordial scent must be everywhere by now, mixing with his sandalwood until the air is thick with both, and you can see it affecting him.Â
See the way his pupils dilate, the way his breathing goes ragged.
âYou smell so good,â he groans. âSmell likeâfuckâlike something I should stay away from but canâtââ
His rhythm becomes more erratic, less controlled, and you can tell heâs close.Â
Can feel the way his cock twitches inside you, the way his grip on your hands tightens.
âPlease,â you beg. âPlease let meâI needââ
âNot yet.â But his voice is strained. âLittle longer, darling. Want to make this last.â
âCanâtâI canâtââ
âYes you can.â He releases one of your hands to reach between your bodies, finding your clit. âCome on. Be good for me.â
You try, god you try so hard to hold it for him, but youâre right there on the edge, muscles tensing, breath coming in gaspsâ
âNow,â he finally says. âCome for me. Let me feel you.â
Permission granted, you shatter.
The orgasm oozes out of you, pleasure crashing through your entire body, and you hear yourself cry out his name. Feel yourself clenching around him, feel the way it drags him closer to his own edge.
âFuckâfuck, Iâmââ His rhythm stutters. âIâm gonnaâwhereââ
âStomach,â you gasp. âPull outââ
He does, barely, and then heâs comingâhot across your stomach, striping your skinâand the sound he makes is broken and honest and absolutely devastating.
For a moment, neither of you moves.
Just breathing hard, hearts racing, processing what just happened.
What youâve done.
âHey.â His voice is soft, grounding. âYou with me?â
âYeah,â you manage. âIâm here.â
âGood.â He presses a kiss to your forehead, lingering. âThatâs good. Just breathe, okay? Iâve got you.â
Then his medical training kicks in, but gentle, always so gentle when it concerns you.
âHold still,â he says, voice tender. âLet me take care of this.â
Heâs already moving, grabbing gauze and warm water from the supply station. His hands are gentle when they touch your stomach, cleaning you up with careful attention. The cum comes off easily, and heâs thorough about it, making sure your skin is completely clean before tossing the gauze in the medical waste bin.
âOkay?â he asks softly, hand coming to rest on your hip. âDid I hurt you?â
âNo.â Your voice is steadier now. âNo, you didnât hurt me.â
âPromise?â
âPromise.â
He lets out a breath he seems to have been holding.
âGood. Thatâsâthatâs good.â His thumb strokes your hip absently. âWater. You need water. Donât move.â
He crosses to his desk, still naked, and returns with a bottle of water from the mini-fridge he keeps stocked. Twists the cap off and holds it out.
âDrink.â
You take it, but your hands are still shaky enough that he notices.
âHere.â He guides the bottle to your lips, one hand supporting the back of your head. âSlow sips. There you go.â
The water is cold and perfect, and you didnât realize how thirsty you were until it hits your tongue.Â
You drink half the bottle before pulling back.
âMore,â he says gently.
âIâm okayââ
âHumor me.â His voice is soft but firm. âYou need to rehydrate. Just a little more.â
You drink again, and he watches with that attention to detail thatâs so distinctive of himâthe doctor who notices everything, who makes sure his patients are properly cared for.
Except youâre not just a patient anymore.
And heâs not just your doctor.
When youâve finished enough to satisfy him, he sets the bottle aside and helps you sit up properly, moving with you so you donât have to do it alone.Â
Then heâs pulling you against his chest, arms coming around you like he needs the contact as much as you do.
âYou okay?â His voice rumbles through his chest. âReally?â
âYeah.â You let yourself relax into him, feeling his heartbeat start to slow. âAre you okay?â
He laughs, but itâs shaky.
âI donât know.â His hand comes up to stroke your hair, slow and soothing. âI justâwe justââ
âI know.â
âAnd I donâtââ His voice stills. âI donât regret it. I should, but I donât.â
âMe neither.â
He presses his face into your hair, breathing you inâcherry cordial mixing with sandalwood.
âWe could get in serious trouble.â
âI know.â
âAnd I still donât regret it.â He pulls back just enough to cup your face, tilting it up so you have to look at him. âI donât regret you.â
The intensity in his eyes makes your chest tight. âHoseokââ
âI need you to know that.â His thumbs stroke your cheekbones. âWhatever happens next, whatever we have to deal withâI donât regret this. I donât regret us.â
âNeither do I.â
His smile is small but genuine, and he leans in to kiss youâsoft and sweet and nothing like the desperate kisses from before. This is careful. Reverent.Â
A promise.
When he pulls back, his hand finds yours, lacing your fingers together.
âWeâre going to have to talk about this,â he says quietly. âAbout what it means. What we do now.â
âI know.â
âThe rulesââ
âStill exist.â You squeeze his hand. âBut so does this.â