#blaidded

THE NIGHT GIFTS THE MONASTERY AN UNORTHODOX CHILL,   the coldest one thus far in the season—–      the professors had even agreed to cut their lessons short to allow the students time to help prepare the academy for what would surely be an incoming storm.    each house was delegated to a set of tasks   &   once they were completed   &   all the buildings were secure,    THE STUDENTS WERE LEFT TO THEIR OWN WHIMS.    some had gone to enjoy a meal together,   others had gone to share a cup of hot milk or cocoa.    edelgard had certainly socialized,    but as she attempts to recall that time hours later .  .  .      her mind bucks within her grasp   &    she goes back to that shadowed place.   there,    she sees each of her beloved siblings,    with eyes   &   smiles like hers.    she could only make out their bloody silhouettes,   their shoulders shaking with the same sorrow that racks her;  THEIR PAIN IS HERS,   HER PAIN IS THEIRS.   confined to individual cells,   with not even the comfort of each other——   &   the incessant weeping .  .  .     her mouth moves in her recollection,   but she does not know what comes out of it.    did she cry ?    did she scream ?    she could scarcely remember   &   yet the nightmares were still relentless.  

hubert had given these instances a name,   something akin to an attack of sorts.   he made her promise to call him if they ever happen,   but .  .  .     she couldn’t bring herself to use her voice on her own.    all she could do was wrap her quivering arms around her knees,   &   as she does so,   she momentarily pauses to observe THE RED that colors the tops of her bare toes.   she grazes over them in her stupor,   her fingers donning the same crimson when she meets the tender skin.    this is the first of many pointless fixations her mind lingers on.   through the tears,    she was still looking for some semblance of sanity,    for some physical matter to anchor her to reality.   nothing seemed to answer her silent desperation as wave after wave of unwanted memories flooded her psyche.   her bed offered no comfort.   the chill that wafted through her open window numbed her skin,   BUT BARELY TOUCHED HER RAW,   WEEPING EYES.   through the infrequent    &   shallow breaths her body forces itself to take,   edelgard vaguely senses a vibration deep in her throat——    is she screaming ?   is she such a puppet to her those wretched people that even now,    they control her voice ?    HER PEACE ?

would there be no end to these senseless attacks ?  would there be no——     a sharp groan from her door briefly cleaves her brutish thoughts,    the sound could have only been made by an abrupt wood - on - wood interplay   &   it is this nuance that her mind focuses on rather on the man in her doorway.    IN TRUTH,   she could feel fear cumulate at the base of her stomach,   its freshness almost strangely comforting when its predecessors were of the older kind.   she doesn’t raise her eyes when she hears a familiar voice utter a familiar nickname,   she doesn’t react when he draws closer.    they’re coming to take me back to my cell,    aren’t they ?    she resigns to her fate,   her muscles limp,   her eyes flooding with fresh tears.   SHE IS THAT SMALL GIRL IN RAGS AGAIN.   that poor,    weak girl in chains who couldn’t even comfort her younger siblings as they wailed alongside her.   all she could do was fold in on herself,   forcing her knees closer to her chest   &  pressing her eyes into the bruised skin there.   would she have to suffer all over again ?

❝   el?   el,  please.  ❞

❝    ARE YOU REALLY SO KEEN ON MAKING ME YOUR VILLAIN ?   ❞   it must be strange,   unnerving even,   to see the red emperor furrow her eyebrows in a show of .  .  .     would you call it sorrow ?   her lips’  downturn seems to say it all.    here,   she kneels in front of her opposer with her axe forced out of her hands   &   thrown to the side   (   THE KING OF FAERGHUS HAD ALWAYS BEEN AN EXCEPTIONAL FIGHTER   ).   ❝   if you would just surrender the church to me------     we could stop all of this bloodshed.    don’t you remember our promise ?   ❞