#bl recommendation

This hug juxtaposed with the episode 4 hug is my favorite thing about episode 10. Peem is ALL IN. Curled into Khem, arms wrapped fully around him, face tucked into his shoulder and neck. Fully in it, weak with relief that he managed to save his baby.

Then there’s episode 4. He’s understanding but stiff and awkward. He embraces Khem back very awkwardly and almost unwillingly. Only because he knows what Khem is going through and that he needs time to sort through their past lives like he had. His eyes are cast far off, like he’s trying to distance himself from this moment as much as he can.

WHAT. AN. EPISODE. I’m just… lost for words. I cannot believe they DARED to air this on a fucking Sunday, condemning us to a full week of emotional rot before we get the actual reckoning. Because Fan Xiao? Oh sweetheart… Shulang is going to FUCK YOU UP and you deserve it, you stupid asshole (affectionate).

First of all, we watched Fan Xiao go absolutely FERAL the moment Shulang asked for time. He pretends it’s a power-play - “how dare he leaves me, only I can leave him” - but we all know the truth (his “blue” side knows it too): he simply cannot function without Shulang’s calm, steady, loving presence grounding him. SIGH. Why not just accept this and stop doubling down on your dirtbag schemes, you loser (affectionate)!

ANYWAY.

Then… listen. I was in AWE when Fan Xiao “acted” wounded and betrayed, as if Shulang was wrongfully accusing him - twisting the knife to make Shulang feel guilty and then dump him “hard” 🙄. But I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times: Shulang is THE smartest, most rational character in Cdramaland. He CLOCKED Fan Xiao’s petty (okay, disgusting) schemes before Fan Xiao even carried them out. Oh, Fan Xiao… you picked the toughest cookie. You desecrated his altar and now you will live with the consequences of the one person you love most ignoring you, hating you, being disgusted by you. You lost so completely that I almost feel sorry for you.

Almost.

Because honestly? Fan Xiao played the perfect game - anyone else would’ve crumbled. Anyone else would’ve been gaslit into oblivion, hollowed out, reshaped to fit the mold he wanted. But not You Shulang. Yes, he was tricked. Yes, he believed Fan Xiao loved him (and by God, he actually DOES😭). But he never once stopped using his brain. He stayed himself.

There’s a huge difference between being fully manipulated versus falling into someone’s trap without losing your core - and Shulang never lost himself. I cannot emphasize this enough. He fell for Fan Xiao, but he did not fall under him. And even though Shulang will absolutely berate himself to death for not seeing things sooner, the truth is: he might be the only person in this world immune to Fan Xiao’s deceits.

But let’s talk about that final confrontation. Tears were streaming when Shulang finally faced Fan Xiao -and that line, “I’ll treat this year… as a horrible nightmare.” GOD. The voice crack on “horrible nightmare” will haunt me for days. (Def until next Saturday.)

And next Saturday? That’s when we will see Shulang get up off that floor, reset his mindset, wipe his tears, and GO FUCK FAN XIAO UP LIKE THE BADASS BOSS HE IS.

𐙚𓈒 Codename: Anastasia