Jul 17
Mew
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Mew
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Hii, so sorry to bother you, and if my english is not the best.
I recently re-read a fic of yours, "In Spite", of Bingjiu. Is from so long... 2024! I feel a little dumb asking, but will you ever continue it? It seemed you had other chapters, of course if you lost interest or smth is perfectly fine! I just wanted to know if there was still hope. Is a fic I really like! Is so interesting how you write I love it! And well... is the only fic that adapts to how I like bingjiu. Hope to not bother, thank youu 🫶
Hi!!
Firstly, thank you so much for reading In Spite! and re-reading and reaching out!
I do want to finish the fic, I've just been distracted by another fandom. I've been trying to get back into bingjiu because I love them and I want to complete the fic. I need to do a full re-read myself. It is definitely not abandoned!
If you feel comfortable, please reach out to my via dm! I would love to chat about bingjiu with you and it would motivate me to write more sooner rather than later <3
Thanks so much again! I'm so happy this story stayed with you so long, i actually can't believe it's been two years already lol.
tldr: I will finish it, please don't lose hope.
Rotating Bingjiu AUs in my mind. Bingge going to another world and courting a Shen Jiu before he becomes a peak lord when he’s still working for Wu Yanzi. He’s older than him, well spoken and successful, so Shen Jiu puts him into the “mine and also better than me” category that Yue Qi was in. Bingge marries him and takes him back and he becomes the most annoying toxic possessive wife everyone else in the harem can’t stand at all. Clinging to Binghe’s arm, giving him the silent treatment for not paying him enough attention, glaring daggers at anyone whose gaze lingers on him for too long. Luo Binghe is eating it up because what do you mean the man who refused to give him the satisfaction of crying when he cut off his legs is now visibly seething because he was a few minutes late to their dinner? He loves seeing his Shizun so cute desperate for him and he gets a sick kick knowing that the original is turning in his grave. He becomes this worlds total enabler of Shen Jiu, buying him all sorts of gifts, neglecting the rest of his harem, letting him do absolutely anything that he wants. Until one day he walks in on him pouring hot tea onto one of the young servants they have, and his stomach drops. Shen Jiu has no qualms about it, he doesn’t think his ruthless husband will care in the slightest. But for some reason he FLIPS OUUTT! Shen Jiu has no idea what he did wrong, it’s just a stupid little beast?! Bingge has no idea why he’s so upset either. This hot rage he’s feeling isn’t jealousy, right? Right?! That would be deranged…
After that happens, neither of them know how to act. Cue Bingge (unsuccessfully) trying self-introspection for the first time in his entire life and unbelievable amounts of paranoia and overthinking from Shen Jiu. What did he possibly do wrong? Is his husband just getting sick of him? Doesn’t love him anymore? What will he do when he leaves him? With his cultivation level fairly low, it would be easy for anyone here to kill him without his protection, and they all have motives. If he’s not the favorite anymore, maybe he should just die anyways.
CW/TW: mentions of trauma, psychological abuse, broken identity, memory loss, grief, self-hatred, unhealthy attachment, implied past torture and non-con. Read at your own discretion.
And it's me again.
With my dead sun.
We stopped at Shen Jiu and Luo Binghe returning to Cangqiong...
Binghe's body wasn't human, it was harder and colder than human, his nails were sharp and his hair rough, outwardly — human and so what? But inside there was no heart, no blood and no organs, his body made from an artifact was strong and powerful but not alive at all... Pale skin embarrassed those who saw Luo Binghe, they were also embarrassed by Luo Binghe's youth. Perhaps when Luo Binghe saw his former body he hated it, but the new one became salvation and curse. He looked like a teenager who fell into the abyss. As if he was still 17, but if you look into his eyes you can understand how deceptive his appearance is.
Even with the new body (old in its newness) he hated it. He remembered everything Xin Mo did to the girls dear to him in the harem, how he killed them, humiliated and wounded them, he was disgusted with his own hands, face, voice, actions.
But most of all he hated Shen Jiu. Actually not that, he hated that he couldn't kill him and end his life.
In his youth Luo Binghe had sincere awkward and tender feelings for this person, he hoped until the very end that Shizun would someday change his opinion of him, would be proud of his disciple. Which never happened.
Now Shen Jiu loved him, panically, madly loved. Binghe was the sun in his world. But Luo Binghe couldn't be the sun, he didn't know how to shine in the darkness, he was afraid of this man's hatred, afraid that Shizun wouldn't understand and would kill him, deep down Luo Binghe hoped that he would do just that.... Destroy his body and maybe.. be free.
That didn't happen.
Xin Mo died. Drowning Shizun's personality with himself. Took away his mind and life, leaving Luo Binghe his body and broken soul.
Shen Jiu doesn't remember who he was, doesn't remember who Luo Binghe is, doesn't remember everything at once, he remembers his memories of torture in passing and as if trifling, not understanding how terrible they are.
Luo Binghe cannot kill him, cannot kill an innocent broken soul that lives because of him.
It hurts, so hurts. He hugs him when he starts to be afraid of something, tugs his hand so Luo Binghe would answer for him, touches his head to check if he's here or not. A chilly feeling scratches him for a long long time.
Shizun looks so fragile when he sleeps holding his hand, Luo Binghe can't fall asleep knowing what this person went through. Can't breathe can't.... Be with him.
"Leader of the sect, all this is in the past, I am able to continue carrying the position of lord of the peak. – cold voice and confident look of his Shizun affects everyone"
Shen Jiu is good at pretending to be someone he hasn't been for a long time. Luo Binghe praises him for it and Shen Jiu is so happy. Quietly alone... Luo Binghe understands that all this is wrong, wrong to lie and pretend, but what can he do? Shizun doesn't want to talk.
"But they will be angry, and they will kill you! And you will suffer! They will take you away from me if they understand something is wrong!!!"
Is that the only thing that worries you, Shizun?...
...
Luo Binghe couldn't do anything before. Couldn't defend his body, couldn't help before. He can only keep up the lie, and make "Shen Jiu" happy so he doesn't fall apart completely.
Shen Jiu hugs the lost-in-thought teenager, his skin is cold and in the summer night it's so pleasant to press against it, his sun is so comfortable! Though very sad and harmful... Shen Jiu doesn't understand him. But it's okay, because the sun never gets offended at him, and is very kind to Shen Jiu.
that was fun tho if anyone wants to send me any asks about which ships I can see in dubcon/noncon scenerios hmu
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Skechs
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