#bi!remus

He wasn't dramatic about it. He didn't blushed like an idiot around her, he wasn't shy. Lily was his friend before anything and they had this brain connection between them, because they both like books and are a little nerdy. He could look at her a little too often sometimes, thinking about her in the night or drink alcohol sadly, when he realized that Lily likes James back and he's just an awful friend to have those feelings for her.

I see Remus as demiromantic, because the way he falled in love with Tonks seemed like it. And I ship him mostly with his friends xd

Sirius is the only one who knows. They never really talked about it, maybe only when Remus was drunk or out of his mind after the full moon, but in general he's just a good observer. And maybe he was a little jealous.

Queue a very long pause. Sirius opened his mouth halfway, then closed it, and opened it again, and spit out, “You don’t fancy me, do you?”

James gave Sirius a weird look.

“Nah, I’m not all that into masculine men,” Remus said, slowly, almost testing the waters. Sirius laughed and paused again, before remembering,

“I was wearing a skirt last week, you prat, don’t insult me by calling me masculine.”

Ship: ReVer (Remus x Female OC)  Word Count: 1273 Genre: Fluff Summary: Remus and Veronica cause some mischief in a store. 

Remus gripped his weapon of choice, a black, fine tip Sharpie. His wary glances searched for any witnesses to his great escapade. He met eyes with his girlfriend, Veronica, across the aisle and nodded once before they began their short journey. They tried to act nonchalant when other shoppers walked by. Remus whistled a short tune, pretending to examine a bright yellow polo hanging next to him as Veronica analyzed some slacks. When the coast was clear, the pair sauntered up to the mannequins, mischievous grins etched on their faces. Taking one last look around to make sure they weren’t being watched, they began to execute the plan.

Unsheathing their markers from the caps, they frantically scribbled on the blank faces of the white figures. Remus gave them mustaches and goatees as Veronica drew expressive eyes and eyebrows. Giggles escaped from within, as they attempted to work quickly and quietly. Soon, all four mannequins had been, modified, to their liking. 

“Hey!” An employee yelled, spotting the couple from several aisles down. “You two!”

Their heads whipped towards the voice, and within an instant, Remus had grabbed Veronica’s hand and pulled her behind him as he bolted. Both laughed wildly as they ran through the store. The poor employee’s shouts faded as they ventured further into the store, slowing down to catch their breath once they were far enough. 

Other shoppers gave them odd looks, some annoyed by the ruckus they were causing. A young boy looked on, entranced by their colorful hair and bizarrely patterned clothes, but was tugged away by his disapproving mother.

“The look on his face!” Remus wheezed, leaning against a shelf, causing Veronica to break out in laughter all over again as she nodded. 

“Priceless!” she agreed. “And the one you made with the handlebar mustache!” 

“My finest work,” he mocked pride, chuckling, sparing a glance to see they had ended up in the summer clearance aisle. 

Red and white tags adorned each item, discounts outlined in large fonts. Forgotten blow-up floaties and swimsuits gathered dust on the semi barren shelves. Only the dysfunctional items remained, sadly displayed. Remus turned to ask his girlfriend what was next on their agenda before getting a face full of foam.

“En garde!” Veronica laughed, holding a pool noodle at arm’s length like a sword.

Remus stumbled away in surprise before a wicked grin grew on his face as he grabbed the nearest inflatable toy and struck back with equal force. Veronica parried his strike and pushed forward, meeting him with another blow.

“You’ll never win, fair maiden!” Remus declared.

“Famous last words. Surrender now, or prepare to die!” She took a few more confident strides towards him, forcing her boyfriend to retreat. After a couple more steps, the back of Remus’s leg hit something, making him trip backward into a kiddy pool.

“Shoot, are you alright?” Veronica’s tone immediately switched from playful to concerned, though her smile showed the mirth she was trying to hold back. She peered down at her boyfriend, her hair falling past her shoulders. She offered him a hand to stand. 

Instead of grabbing it to hoist himself up, Remus did quite the opposite. He dramatically laid a hand on his forehead, pretending to gasp for breath, as if he were drowning. As he acted out his death, he motioned for Veronica to save him. She rolled her eyes, crouching on the floor and dragging his deadweight out of the pool and onto the hard linoleum floor. 

“Oh no. My beloved boyfriend has left me alone in this lifetime. Whatever shall I do?” She deadpanned.

Remus opened one eye, before stage-whispering, “CPR.” 

She chuckled, “Of course,” she leaned down and pecked his lips. 

Remus swiftly sat up, brushing himself off. “Wow, would you look at that, all better.”

“Magical,” Veronica agreed, straightening up with him. 

A couple of good-natured customers applauded their small performance, whereas the snooty ones rolled their eyes 

Remus and Veronica both gave small curtsies to their audience. “Thank you! Thank you! Encore in aisle four tomorrow afternoon.” Remus joked. He threw an arm around his girlfriend as the small crowd dissipated, ruffling her pink hair. 

“Where to next, Roni?” 

She looped her arm around his waist, humming in thought. “Let’s see where our feet take us.” She led them in a random direction, softly singing along to the music playing over the speakers, swaying her hips slightly to the beat. 

Remus took this time to truly admire his significant other. Her pink-tipped hair bounced hypnotically as she walked, and her lips quirked upwards in a permanent smirk. Her eyes shone with mischief and light. Sweet cheese, he was in deep. He pressed an adoring kiss to her crown, nuzzling his nose into it as they walked. Veronica instinctively leaned her head against his.

“I love you,” she stated as they wandered through the different departments.

Remus grinned. “I love you too.” His eyes lazily scanned the products on the shelves, not paying close attention to where they were headed. He snapped to attention, however, when Veronica gasped.

“Remus, look!” she pointed out two mini cars, meant for kids, displayed in the rear of the toy section. One was a smaller replica of a bright pink Chevy Camaro and the other was the model of a lime green Volkswagen Beetle. 

They both circled the cars examining them. 

“Do you think there’s a weight limit?” she asked.

Remus scrunched his nose, “Probably, but who cares. The important question is, do they have batteries in them?” He crouched next to the pink one, flicking the ‘on’ switch with the fake keys and pushing on the accelerator. Sure enough, it lurched forward. The couple met each other’s eyes, each with an impish gleam in them. 

Veronica gracefully hopped into the Beetle as Remus flailed to get into the Camaro. The hard plastic of their respective vehicles dipped under their weight, but the couple paid no mind. They each slammed on the accelerator, the toys groaned with protest as they crawled forward at a ridiculously slow pace. The motors whirred, straining to keep moving. Determined to win this unproclaimed race of theirs, Remus began to scoot in place, hoping his momentum would help push the car ahead.

“Hey!” Veronica objected, latching on to his green and black sweatshirt, pulling at the material. She managed to gain on him, making them level when an unassuming employee sauntered into the aisle while making his rounds.

His expression went from bored to surprised to angry all in three seconds. “Idiot kids! Those are for display, they’re not meant to be ridden, especially by you!” The older man, shook his fist, cursing the pair all the way as they scrambled out of their seats, dashing towards the exits. Remus and Veronica weaved in and out of aisles and around clothes racks. They ran until they were out of the store, howling with laughter all the way. 

“And stay out!” The employee yelled from somewhere behind them. 

They caught their breath in the parking lot, gulping sweet, sweet oxygen into their lungs.

“I totally won, babe,” Remus said casually, as they strolled to their beat-up pickup truck.

Veronica made a noise of offense, lightly hitting her boyfriend’s chest with the back of her hand. “You did not. If it weren’t for that worker I would’ve overtaken you,” she proclaims, bumping their shoulders playfully. 

“In your dreams, Roni,” he smirked, opening the passenger side door and jumping in after her. He took her hand as she started up the vehicle. “Same time next week?”

She smiled, leaning over to kiss his cheek. “It’s a date.”

Hey anon! I hope that this is what you have in mind…if not I can try again! :)

::::

Sirius flirts with everyone. Everyone. It drives Remus batshit, and he wonders if that’s exactly why Sirius does it.

Marlene thinks it’s hilarious. More than once she’s born witness to Remus nearly pulling out his hair while Sirius was busy chatting it up with everyone in The Leaky Cauldron.

“I cannot believe you don’t see it,” Marlene says one day, shaking her head as Remus’s left eye twitches slightly. A fair-haired bloke sits in Sirius’s lap, one arm draped over his shoulders.

“What don’t I see?” Remus breathes, taking an unhealthy swig of his ale. Normally he doesn’t indulge in drink, but seeing the bloke whispering into Sirius’s ear makes him want to drown in alcohol.

Marlene just shakes her head, downing a shot of harsh, Muggle vodka. “You’ll figure it out.”

And Remus does. The day that Sirius kisses him and then goes down on him.

Afterward, Remus pants like a dog (a morbid fact that’s not lost on him), and when he reaches for Sirius’s trouser zipper, he stops him. Remus almost pulls away, hurt by Sirius’s rejection, but he’s surprised when he feels arms around him.

“It’s not you, Remus,” Sirius says in his ear.

When he turns to look at Sirius, his face says all it needs to because soon Sirius’s head is thrown back in a laugh.

“What?” Remus demands, half-confused and half-irritated.

“I can’t believe you don’t know!” Sirius responds, a huge, annoying smile on his face.

Marlene’s words float through Remus’s head, causing exasperation to flow through him. “What the fuck don’t I know?”