#benedict cucumber

“AND… DONE!” You shouted as you clicked the submit button, no more uni, no more assignments, and above it all, no more Cumberbatch. 

“Don’t be dramatic,” your best friend rolled her eyes, incredibly exhausted of the greek drama that had been your relationship with your thesis supervisor for the last year. 

“Do. not. take. this. away. from. me. You didn’t have to spend the entire summer stuck in a library because your dickhead supervisor was just unhappy with every single one of your drafts. You were at the beach while I was stuck reading page after page of redlining. I am free. I will never need to read the name Cumberbatch anywhere.”

“I am proud of you,” she tried to be supportive, although she could barely take you seriously. It was true, Cumberbatch had been an absolute asshole about the whole process but you had not made the whole ordeal any easier, seeking the most complicated topic possible. You yourself had picked Cumberbatch because of his ruthlessness. A challenge, you had called it. So in reality you had absolutely no right to complain. “When are you leaving?”

“Tomorrow morning, flight leaves at 3 pm.” 

“I can’t believe that out of every possible place in the world, you chose to go stay on a random cottage in the mountains,” she huffed her answer.

“I want to relax, to be away from everyone, from the city, from people, from even the scarcest possibility I will run into him.”

“fair enough.”

…

POV Benedict

The streets were rushing past me, my eyes had a hard time focusing on the sights that were blurred by the rain rolling down the windows of the taxi. I felt my jaw muscles tense at every red light, tightening my grip on my phone as I tried to hold back the angry words wanting to leave me.

I was rushing late, the one virtue I have always taken pride in was my punctuality, forcing students to step out of the lecture halls whenever they turned up just a minute too late. And now I was about to miss my flight, the one getaway I’ve been looking forward to for the past weeks, perhaps even months.

“How much longer will it take us?” My voice dripped with annoyance, eyes finding the ones of the taxi driver through his rearview mirror. The man’s eyes flickered back to the street, murmuring “Five more minutes”, voice laced with a tone that matched mine.

The seconds fading by felt like days I had been forced to endure, staring into the faces of bored students, those that tried to listen but miserably failed to understand simple concepts, those that didn’t even try to pay attention, already accepting that they’d fail my class. And then there was (yn), the one student that had always challenged me, though not with her smart answers or her clever homework, but the determination to watch me struggle.

“We’re here, sir.” With my eyes snapping back towards the driver I forced myself out of my thoughts, pushing a few bank notes into his outstretched hand before I rushed through the airport. I barely focused on the security check, barely focused on the people that called out to me as I pushed past them.

With my eyes set on the terminal counter I rushed past a queue of people wanting to board the same flight I had booked. The woman working at the counter watched me approach with her eyebrows furrowed and her painted lips pulled into a fake smile, waiting for me to start speaking.

“I’ve been stuck in traffic, I’m so sorry! I’m booked for business class.” She watched me for a few seconds, gaze wandering up and down my frame before she slowly parted her lips, about to reply.

“We are all business class here, so have the decency to wait till it’s your turn.” An all too familiar voice rang in my ears, forcing me to slowly turn around. A groan threatened to claw through me as my eyes met the now growing big ones of (yn). “Professor Cumberbatch?”

Well, fuck me.

…

I looked away, ignoring her, trying my best to not let the embarrassment of the interaction tint my cheeks as I stepped to the back of the queue. 

I held my head low as I hope she would ignore me too but instead I felt her gaze linger on me. 

Brilliant. Exactly what I needed. A student to be on the same flight as me. I felt a migraine start in the center of my forehead. It is okay. It is just the flight I reminded myself. In just four hours I shall be free from anybody or anything related to the university.

I finally arrived at the front of the queue and presented my ticket. The woman at the counter gave me a courteous smile as I walked through, down the hall and into the plane. I scanned the seats for my number and watched as no other than my most consequential sat in the empty seat by its side. 

Her eyes were fixated on me, a mix of disbelief and something else in her gaze. She watched me put my bag on the top compartment as I tried my best to keep my eyes away from her. She seemed completely determined to meet my gaze. 

I took the seat by her side and exhaled, at least glad to not have missed my flight. 

“Vacation?” She interrupted my peace again. Why was she trying to talk to me?

“Yes.” I kept my eyes ahead, her gaze burning against my skin.

“Not a fan of the sea?”

I did not reply, instead putting my earphones on and closing my eyes. This was about to be a long flight. 

She seemed to take the hint, making no further attempts to talk to me.

Food was served two hours later. The hostess approached us with a smile, asking us what we would like to eat.

“I will take the soup, the steak and a glass of Sauvignon Noir.” I told the stewardess and avoided turning to look at (yn).

The woman looked at my student, waiting for her response. “Hi Jennie, yes. I will take the same for food, a glass of whiskey for me. Bring Benedict one too.”

I couldn’t help myself, glancing at her, a shocked look on my face as I searched her eyes. She however kept her eyes on the stewardess. I had never heard her say my name. It felt like an insult, a dig at my rudeness. 

“Perfect, I will be right back.”

She put her earphones on, not even glancing my way and did not try to talk to me again for the rest of the flight. 

…

YOUR POV 

Your steps were quick, eyes focused ahead, hoping that you could pick up your luggage before the crowd of people slowly following you would catch up. You didn’t dare look back, didn’t dare look at the hot awful professor who had been sitting next to you, clearly struggling with your closeness.

A proud sense of victory had flushed through your veins as he had stared at you, wide eyes watching you interact with the stewardess, a sense of kindness a man of his kind was no longer familiar with. An awfully rude, stuck up, but fucking handsome man like him.

You could see the luggage bands from afar, sighing in relief as you came to a halt. With your eyes flickering down to your phone you didn’t pick up on the way Cumberbatch studied you, slowly coming to a halt right next to you. No words left either one of you, eyes snapping towards the now approaching luggage.

Your mouth was burning, lips struggling to stay pressed together, but you tried to hold back. As much as you wanted to speak to him, for the fun of annoying him, you couldn’t endure another rude word leaving his mouth, you’d snap, you’d tell him how awful he could be. Nothing you wanted to deal with as your tiredness slowly caught up with you. 

One suitcase after another rolled past the two of you, eyes impatiently trying to locate your own luggage, though without any luck. Slowly the crowd around you grew less and less, thinning out as you still waited for theirs.

“Do you think they lost our luggage?” You kept your voice soft, without any strength guiding the words rolling off your tongue. It took the professor a few moments to reply, eyes finding yours as a sigh left him. 

“Seems like it, wait here, I’ll try to find somebody.” You got no time to reply, watching the man with his spotless suit disappear within the crowd of other people. But no matter how many people would surround him, your eyes would always find him, the odd one out that never seemed to fit in. His posture was too straight. His curls were too curly. His eyes were too piercing. No matter what it was, he always seemed to add an extra touch that left your insides churning and your blood rushing.

It was pathetic, really, a crush so painful yet so thrilling. There was nothing you could hold onto, no interaction that gave you even the smallest bit of hope that he liked you too, professor Cumberbatch detested you, he avoided you like you were a deadly virus made to kill him, but you couldn’t let go of the thoughts racing through your mind. He was everywhere you went, following you like a shadow, at least the thought of him did.

“Seems like our suitcases didn’t make it here. Where are you going from here? They need an address.” The professor’s voice ripped you out of your daydreams, hazy eyes finding his cold, almost distanced ones. 

“At the mountain retreat, it’s about an hour from here, I think.” His eyes grew wider, pupils dilated as if you were threatening him, forcing him to make a decision of life or death. Silent curses left him, words you couldn’t pick up on as you stared at him with confusion laced in you gaze.

“Seems like we had the same plans for our vacation getaway.” Slowly it dawned on you, eyes growing just as wide as you realised that he was staying at the same retreat. 

—-

You barely had to do any talking for the next two hours. The professor taking it upon himself to advocate for both of your bags to be delivered as soon as humanly possible to your resort. He had used the same tone he used to speak to you and your classmates, belittling everyone who would not agree or obey his orders instantly. 

The airline people could not do much else than agree with him, apologise profusely, and promise him every refund and offer that they could think of.

“You also will be compensated for any clothes you need to purchase until your bags get delivered tomorrow.” 

The words finally forced you to clock back into the conversation as your professor turned back to you, giving you your boarding pass and a handful of other papers including vouchers and already filled out forms. 

“How were you planning on getting there?” He spoke your way, his blue eyes piercing through you. 

“Taxi.”

“You can come with me. I have a driver picking me up.”

“I need to get some clothes for tonight. It-“ 

“I need to do the same. You have already infiltrated my vacation. I can bear a couple more hours.” 

…

“Should we just meet here again in, I don’t know, twenty minutes?” Your voice rang in his ears as you walked through the mall, exhaustion dripped from your words, filling your every vein. The day had been long, adventurous, and somewhat fucked up, thoughts racing, heart pounding, palms sweaty, all thanks to him.

“No, we’ll stick together, I don’t want to waste any more time waiting for you.” His harsh words left you groaning, choking on a quiet “You stereotypical asshole” he either didn’t hear or simply chose to ignore. 

The professor walked ahead of you, forcing you to follow him through the store, picking up shirts, dress shirts, another pair of trousers, and some underwear. On another day you’d have studied him intently, would have picked up on every move of his, on every expression tugging on his features, but right now all you wanted to do was hide away, searching the comfort of your bed, of the quietness you had hoped the retreat could offer her. 

“It’s astonishing how lost you always are, but it’s good to know that you’re not just like this in my classes.” Once again did his words ripped you out of yours thoughts, blinking a few times to let go of your hazy state. Angry words threatened to leave you, wanting to argue with the stuck up man, but you kept quiet, turning away from him as you browsed through the women’s section. 

You felt his eyes on you, watching how you halfheartedly thumped through different sections, picking up comfortable shirts you could wear, trousers, and a new sweater. The second you stepped foot into the underwear section you had expected him to halt, not daring to follow you around like a shadow, but he kept following you, seemingly not picking up on the heat flushing through your system.

You stood by the counter, trying to decide which outfit to take and which to leave as the total would be above the airliners allowance, cursing the Professor for choosing such an expensive store to buy from. The professor however didn’t give you any chance to pick, snatching the clothes from your hands as he turned towards the cashier. You stared at him for a few seconds before your mind caught up with what he was about to do.

“I can pay for the clothes.” But all the professor did was shake his head, silencing you with the way he swiped his credit card, paying for both of your clothes. Your mouth felt dry, hating that your heart began to swell in your chest, once again growing rather fond of the man who acted like he hated you like Menelaus had hated Paris, starting a deadly war that would forever change the course of history. 

You could only guess that your stay at the retreat would change your relationship, for better or worse, only time would be able to tell. And with a small “Thank you” leaving you, you followed him out of the store, back to his driver.

… 

The car ride to the retreat was deathly silent. You kept your eyes on the street and tried to ignore how nice he looked sitting by your side, just the middle seat dividing you. 

He did the same, working on his phone, mumbling under his breath words of disapproval every now and then. You were about to arrive at your stay when he chuckled, calling your attention to him. He turned his screen to you, showing you a pdf document. 

“Seems like your dissertation is next.” He chuckled again, but you could barely restrain yourself from talking back, utterly disgusted that he was reading any dissertation as if it was the newspaper, on his way to his luxury vacation. “Expectations are high.”  

You didn’t answer, thankful that the car came to a halt. “We are here,” the driver spoke.

—-

The two of you separated as soon as you were out of the car, heading to the reception at your own pace. He arrived first giving you his back as he talked to the woman on the other side of the counter. 

She nodded and looked at him as if he was the only thing in the room, as everybody did. He was escorted to his room as soon as he was done talking. He didn’t even look your way or acknowledge the time you had just spent together, simply walking away.

—-

You could barely sleep that night. The thought that that asshole was reading the hardest piece of research you had ever worked on while getting a massage made your blood boil. You turned and tossed in the panties he had bought you, that he had held in his hands together with the rest of the clothes you were wearing.

It made your skin burn, the thought of his touch even just indirectly on you waking a fire inside you. Your mind moved to the way he had commanded everybody at the store, so sure of himself, so decisive. He knew exactly what button-up to get, what cotton shirt, and the pyjama shorts he had gotten. You swallowed loudly, pressing the pillow against your face, trying your best to remove him from your thoughts.

—-

For the next two days you had assumed your professor had rebooked the next flight home and left. You had not seen him anywhere, not even when your luggage had been delivered by the airline. 

You had initially tried to convince yourself that it was a good thing. Good riddance. And yet, you found yourself looking for him everywhere, picking your best outfits in case you ran into him at dinner, in the garden for breakfast, in the spa, anywhere.   

You couldn’t help but constantly wonder what he was doing. Whether he was done reading your dissertation… whether he had enjoyed it. That night you decided to sign up for a hike the day after. That would free your mind from him, it would finally allow you to enjoy the vacation you had paid so much for.

---

With tiredness dripping from your every movement, you found yourself walking towards the meeting spot of the hike, not awake enough just yet. A yawn clawed through you as you joined the small group, a sound that got stuck in your throat as soon as your gaze fell onto an all too familiar face. 

This must be some sick joke of fate, you were sure of it. 

“Seems like we’re complete. Good morning guys, my name is Daniel, just call me Dan if you want.” Your eyes snapped towards Cumberbatch, unable to bite down your grin as the corners of his mouth were pulled down, he hated nothing more than nicknames, short forms of names that made no sense to the man who found pride in his every title. “We’ve got quite some hours ahead of us, I’d advise you to find yourself a hiking buddy for the upcoming hours, just in case you need some help. Any questions before we start?”

You barely paid Dan’s voice any attention, unable to draw your gaze away from the professor. Where had he been hiding? Had he purposely avoided crossing paths with you? Were you that awful to be around? His hot and cold demeanour towards you always left you with a painful headache, unable to tell what he wanted from you; a childish game he seemed to find enough joy in to keep on dragging it out.

Even though your body screamed for you to move towards him, to force him to be your hiking buddy, as Dan had called it, you didn’t dare move. You watched the others pair up, instantly lured into conversations, small talk you have always struggled with. 

“How about you walk a bit with me, huh?” Dan’s voice ripped you out of your thoughts, eyes flickering from his friendly ones towards the piercing, cold ones of Cumberbatch. The man was already staring at you, lips pulled into a thin line. And with a smile glued to your lips, you murmured a tired though friendly “Sure!” 

…

You had walked with Dan for about an hour, pulled into exchanges you couldn’t even remember by now. Somewhere along the way your professor had managed to join the conversation, voice dripping with something you couldn’t pinpoint. Perhaps he was simply as tired as you were, perhaps he was annoyed by the cold that nibbled on his limbs, but perhaps, just perhaps, it had something to do with the way Dan kept looking at you.

The guy was handsome, you couldn’t deny it, but yet you found no interest in him, thoughts guided by the way your heart raced whenever Cumberbatch spoke up, focusing on the richness of his voice, on the way he managed to express himself oh so cleverly. Fuck, you felt like a schoolgirl, crushing on a man who’d never pay you enough attention to realise how smart, how cunning, how beautiful you truly were. Longings like clouds moving on the dark sky above, carrying rain that would clash to the earth miles and miles away from where they were supposed to rain down. A hopeless ache. A hopeless longing. A hopeless reality.

“So, what did you do in the last days?” Your voice rang in your ears, speaking the words before your mind could register what you were doing. The professor’s eyes met yours, clearing his throat as he pondered over the question.

“I had to join some last minute meetings, seems like I can’t get away from work, no matter how hard I try.” You couldn’t stop your chuckles from bubbling out of you, a sound that forced his eyebrows to furrow, wondering where your amusement came from.

“As if you’d ever willingly take a break from work. We both know you don’t take any rest.” No matter how hard he tried to stop his lips from forming a small grin, he couldn’t stop his body from reacting to the teasing. You took it as a win, wondering if you had ever seen him smile - or at least give the smallest illusion of a smile - before. 

“Careful, (y/n), you don’t want to mess with me before you get your grade, now do you?” No reply left you, thoughts interrupted by Dan’s voice. The words he spoke echoed through the forest, eyes taking in the beautiful nature you were surrounded by. The trees around you stood tall, shielding your group from the sun threatening to break through the leaves, the scent of the forest, of the muddy soil you kept trodding through crawled up your nostrils, instantly relaxing your muscles.

“Be careful on the next few miles, yesterday’s rain made the ground quite muddy, as you can tell. Don’t hesitate to ask your buddies for some help.” Once again the group started walking, once again you walked next to the professor without speaking a single word. The situation had something awkward though amusing to it, trying to find a conversation topic to break the silence. 

But before you could even try to speak up once again, you found yourself slipping, hands grasping the nearest thing you could hold onto before your face would meet the muddy ground. The professor’s hands had shot out to steady you, placed comfortably against your waist. Your eyes met his, pupils dilated as the man stared down on you.

Your heart was racing, pounding in your chest as your eyes started flickering from his eyes to his thin lips. Fuck, you had lost count on the amount of times you thought about kissing him, wondering if and how he’d touch you. You could only guess that he’d instantly dominate the situation, he wouldn’t give you any room to guide, that much you were sure of.

The professor seemed to struggle just as much as you did, hands still glued to your frame, eyes finding your lips. It felt as if you were moving closer, just slowly, carefully, testing the uneasy, unfamiliar waters the two of you kept rowing through like small boats caught in a thunderstorm. The first bolt of lightning struck your boat, setting the wood ablaze, instantly sinking to the cold ground.

Without another warning he pulled back from you, hands finding their way to his sides as if he suddenly got disgusted by his own actions. His eyes found yours once again, just for a short moment, before he started walking. It seemed as if he tried to get as much distance between the two of you as possible, instantly succeeding with his fast steps.

You could just stare at him, giving yourself a few more seconds before you also started walking, trying to swallow down your embarrassment. 

—

The feeling of embarassment persisted after the hike. You were thankful when you returned to the resort and went your separate ways. You took a quick shower, trying to remove whatever was left of his touch from your body and then went straight to the sauna, in need of the heat and sweat. 

It was perfect, so incredibly perfect. Your thoughts were hazy from the heat and you felt yourself sweat everything out, your stress, your desire for him, absolutely everything and then, just then, the door of the sauna opened. He stood on the other side of the door, a towel around his waist and a frozen look on his face. He was thinking, making a decision. You expected him to close the door again, walk away, the same way he had avoided you for the past three days. Instead, he stepped in, did not utter a word and sat as far away from you as possible. 

Neither of you spoke for the next five minutes, which felt like five hours to both of you and then you couldn’t help yourself, the thoughts of your dissertation haunting you all week. 

“How is grading my dissertation going?” 

He laughed bitterly, glancing your way, his eyes lingering on you a little longer than normal. “Boring read, I have gone through it so many times in the past 3 months that I don’t even know if you deserve a grade. I pretty much designed the whole thing. You barely wrote it.” 

Your jaw tensed as he looked away, closing his eyes and leaning his head against the wooden board, letting you admire how his adam’s apple bobbed. You wanted to kill him. Asshole. Douchebag. Pi- and yet your eyes were stuck on him, lingering and lowering, following the small droplets of sweat down his firm chest, his stomach, h-

“I am kidding of course. I need to give you a grade. I could not bare having to work on it with you for another year.” He opened his eyes, you whipped your gaze up to him immediately, sadly too late. He had already noticed the way you had been looking at him. Something crossed his gaze but he looked away, almost as if he wanted to get rid of the thought. 

“A good grade.” You suddenly spoke and he seemed to be taken aback by your directness.

“We shall see,” he kept his nonchalant tone but you held his gaze, defiant.

“I deserve a good grade. I worked harder than anybody else in the course. Any of your other students.” You spoke leaning forward. Although the two of you were sitting on opposite sides of the sauna, the distance felt suddenly smaller. 

He couldn’t help himself, as you leaned forward his gaze flickered to your glistening chest. His throat bobbing before he looked away. 

You felt that familiar pull on your centre, feeling your gaze grow slightly hazy as you realised he may be struggling with your proximity as much as you did. 

You opened your lips to say something but he stood quickly, breaking eye contact and walking out without saying anything else.

……

With one last glance thrown at your reflection, you stepped out of the elevator. Your shoes met the ground with every cautious step you took, trying to ignore the racing thoughts that wouldn’t ever allow you to rest. Wherever you went, the thought of him seemed to follow you around, whenever you closed your eyes, his piercing ones seemed to stare down on you, forcing you to dream of him. 

The past moments you shared with your professor kept racing through your thoughts, making you wonder if he was also thinking of you. Your eyes browsed your surroundings, walking towards the area where dinner was being held, outside in the middle of the mountains, railings decorated with fairy lights, casting a beautiful shadow onto the tables for two. 

And there he stood, appearing like Caspar Friedrich’s painting “Wanderer above the Sea of Fog”. With his back turned your way he seemed to admire the area as well, finally allowing himself to breathe calmly. Wordlessly you came to a halt next to him, patiently waiting to be seated, not daring to strike up yet another conversation that would leave you embarrassed and humiliated. 

“Table for two?” The waiter’s eyes flickered between your and Cumberbatch’s bright ones, starting to walk towards a table near the railing, not waiting for your reply. The professor’s eyes met yours before he followed the man with a sigh clawing through him, forcing you to mimic his movements, sinking into the comfortable chair in front of him. “I’ll be back in a few to take your orders.”

No words were shared between the two of you as you browsed the menu, wondering what to order, while your thoughts couldn’t concentrate on the printed words, eyes struggling to stay focused. Your body screamed at you to look at him, feeling his eyes burn your skin, like they’d always do whenever your paths crossed, outside of uni or in the middle of his classes. 

“So,” he cleared his throat. “Did you enjoy your day?” Your eyes grew bigger, wondering if he was truly trying to start a conversation with you. An unfamiliar warmth flooded through you, eyes forced away from his in an almost pathetic attempt to select fitting words, sentences that wouldn’t give off another bad impression. 

“I did, I went on another hike, it’s such a beautiful area, I want to experience as much of it as possible. What about you? Did you manage to take a break from working?” Before he could reply the waiter found its way back to you, carefully listening to your orders, writing down the drinks and dishes your hearts were aching for. 

“I tried to take it slow, and finally managed to finish a book I’ve been reading for the past weeks.” You found yourself hanging onto his every word as if he was sharing ancient secrets with you, letting you in on theories not even the smartest scientists were fortunate enough to pick up on. And with another wave of heat flushing through you, you finally were able to relax, letting go of the tension he always forced through your veins. 

……

“Oh god, don’t remind me, please, that was horrible.” He tilted his head back as another laugh clawed through him, eyes momentarily fluttering close. Your eyes focused on his hand, watching him reach for his almost empty glass of wine. His adam’s apple bobbed as he drowned the last sip, you’ve lost count on the glasses the both of you have drowned by now, enjoying the carefree atmosphere that was almost unfamiliar to the both of you. 

“You were so angry with him, I almost felt pity for you.” His eyes met yours, no longer as sharp and bright as they were hours ago, a hazy coat had laid itself to rest on his pupils, guided by the alcohol thumping through his veins. You were just as tipsy, but you couldn’t spare the way your body reacted to the glasses of wine you had fostered any attention, too happy about finally being able to share a proper conversation with the professor. 

“I always wonder what goes on in your head when you’re in my classes.” You couldn’t hold the intense eye contact he tried to lure you into, focusing on the empty glass of yours, fingertips stroking along the wet rim. “You always seem so distracted, yet you always get the highest grade on your assignments. What is your trick?” 

You watched a smirk tug on his lips, hand no longer placed in his lap, but on the table, dangerously close to yours. With your breath hitched on your chest you allowed yourself to stare at his slender fingers for a few seconds, wondering how it must feel to be touched by him. 

“Maybe I’m just bored by your teaching?” Your chuckles forced another laugh out of the tall, handsome professor, slowly shaking his head. You mimicked his smile, unable to rip yourself out of the grasp he now held on your body and soul, forever trapped by him. 

“We both know that that is not true, I feel your eyes on me, if I wouldn’t know it any better I’d say you’re distracted by me.” An untameable heat thumped through your veins, a heat so biting you feared your body would go up in flames any moment now. Your thighs clenched together, guided by the forbidden imaginations now filing your thoughts, improper, dangerous thoughts. 

“I’m sorry, I have to interrupt.” The sweet voice of an elderly lady interrupted your conversation, eyes snapping towards her. A smile began to widen on her painted lips as she studied the both of you. “I have to ask, how long have you been together? It’s beautiful to watch the two of you, it’s been years since I’ve got to admire such chemistry between a couple.” 

“Oh,” your smile fell, clearing your throat as your eyes found his now hardening ones. “We’re no couple.” 

“Oh, I am so sorry! You look so in love, I was clearly fooled by it. Have a good evening you two.” An uncomfortable silence followed, eyes unable to find their way back together, stuck on the words that still rang in your ears. Benedict rose to his feet without another warning, throwing down his napkin, opening his wallet, dropping a couple of hundred bills with the cold demeanour you knew just like the back of your hand. 

“If you’ll excuse me, I am tired, it’s best I head to bed.” He didn’t look at you, his expression almost bored as he turned to walk away from you. 

You were left speechless, your jaw ajar as you watched him leave. Be it the wine or the whiplash from his behaviour you walked right behind him, almost running to catch up. 

“Bened-“ you started to speak but were immediately shushed by him stopping in his tracks and turning. You crashed against his body. He pulled you away from him, with a disgusted expression. 

“Nobody has given you permission to call me that,” he spoke in a freezing tone, looking down at you with complete indifference.

“But-“ you tried to refute him, pointing out the fact that you had been calling him that for most of the dinner but he interrupted you again.

“You need to learn to keep your distance. Crashing my vacation was one thing but this game you are playing, it needs to stop.”

You felt your stomach turn, suddenly nauseous by his nasty words. “I am not playing any game. I have nothing to gain from this.”

“Oh don’t you? I am sure it is a coincidence that you are doing- doing whatever you are doing to your thesis supervisor. I am sure it is a coincidence that just days ago you turned in the most important piece of coursework you have ever written and I am the one that has to grade it.” 

You felt his words physically hit you, stepping back as you looked at him in complete disbelief. “How dare you.” 

“No. How dare you?” He stepped forward, “use whatever weakness I have for your nonsensical character for your own advantage. I thought you were better than that. Is your work so poor that you need to resort to this?”

You didn’t answer him. You were not about to give him the privilege to see you cry. You turned around and started walking, kept on walking until you were in your room, bag opened, clothes packed, ready to go back home the next day and never see the Professor again.

——

POV BENEDICT

Two days back into the semester and I still could not stop thinking about the vacation, about how awful I had been to her. I hadn’t meant to accuse her… it had just left my lips. Better that accusation than what I actually wanted to say, to do. 

I thought about apologising, about reaching out but I realised it didn’t matter. She was gone. She had received her grade, by far the highest grade that I’ve ever given a dissertation. There was nothing my apology would bring. 

The more I thought about what I had done the more disgusted I was at myself. Her research was immaculate, a true show of passion. She did not need to flirt or be polite to me to ensure a good grade, her work spoke for itself. And yet, I had accused her of such lowly behaviour. 

It did not matter. I had to move on. To stop letting her invade my thoughts. She was gone. She would n— and yet there she stood. I froze in my path, watching as she shook the hand of the dean and walked into his office, just two doors down from mine.

I must have imagined it. No. Yet, her laugh echoed before the door closed and her so familiar overflowing bag followed her as she walked in the room. 

No. I shook myself awake, ignoring the stares of some students as they walked past me, rushing to get to class. I entered my office and sat down, opening Google. Hallucinations and their causes.

—-

I walked to my class that afternoon, quickly making my way through the different hallways. It was still 30 minutes till the start of my lecture, so I got to pick up on the sounds of the different talks being given in my department and suddenly, I was stopped in my tracks. My head whipping to a side, looking into the small window of the classroom and seeing her.

Her in a beautiful white button-up, some suit trousers and a pair of heels, commanding the whole room. Everyone’s eyes were on her and why wouldn’t they be when she looked like that? 

“So yes, that is all the insight I can give you into my career path. I know you are just starting but I hope this has been helpful and it can expand upon your options. Thank you for listening so attentively, if you have any questions I will take them now.”

I felt my stomach turn at the sound of her voice, unable to step away as I watched students, mostly male, lift their hands eagerly to ask her questions. I continued watching her, enthralled, until a student seemed to point at the door, at me. I backed away immediately and started walking away, when I heard the click of her heels behind me.

“Professor,” she spoke in an airy tone. I exhaled before turning around, preparing to have this conversation. My eyes instantly found hers, drawn to the like a moth to a flame, fuck, I felt one flashback after another race through my mind, this is why I needed to distance myself, this is why I can’t stand being around her, not used to the power she holds over me. 

“(Y/n), you’re teaching now? Here?” I watched the corners of her mouth lifting her lips into a smile, a smile that left my insides churning. 

“I do, didn’t you read the welcome email the department sent out yesterday morning?” Her eyes momentarily flickered back to her classroom, knowing that she’d have to return any moment now. I felt my throat growing tighter, unable to speak another word, at least for the next few seconds where I allowed myself to study her. 

“I didn’t, but you know how it is, we always get too many emails at the start of the semester. Feel free to come by my office in the next few days, I’ll let you get back to your students now.” Without waiting for her reply, I turned away from her, forcing myself to search the distance, needing to back away before I’d no longer be able to guide my body. 

……

YOUR POV

“Professor?” Your voice echoed through the office, eyes focused on his frame. He seemed to be deep in thought, eyes focused on the stack of papers covering his desk. His piercing eyes shot towards your frame, straightening his posture. 

“(Y/n), please, come, sit.” It felt unfamiliar to catch the sweet tone of his voice, not used to hearing him speak this softly. Carefully you closed the door, walking towards the chair placed in front of his desk. He watched your every move, and you couldn’t help but wonder what was going through his head as he held eye contact. 

“I,” he cleared his throat, placing his pen down before he slowly sunk back in his chair. “I think I have to apologise. I am sorry for the way I spoke to you, that wasn’t fair of me.” Your heart raced, just like your thoughts did. Did he actually just apologise? Did the man who never dared to even start a proper conversation with another colleague let alone another student actually apologise to you?

“Can I ask why you did it though? I’d lie if I said your words didn’t hurt me. They were cruel, even for you, professor.” He kept watching you, tongue kissing his teeth, seemingly pondering over his next words. You felt the tension rising, it felt like you were close, close to forcing a confession out of him you’ve dreamt of hearing him speak for months on end, yet deep down you knew that you were too delusional for your own good, at least when it came to him. 

“Please, Benedict’s just fine. You see, (y/n), you were by far the brightest student I ever crossed paths with, you could have easily taken over my course. I didn’t trust myself around you, no professor should cherish this kind of interest in their student. And to put it quite frankly, I still don’t trust myself around you.” Your mouth felt dry, throat in knots. Was that it? Did he finally give into what you desperately had hoped to hear him speak? Heat flushed through your system, a heat so biting you were forced to avert your gaze, focusing on your trembling fingers. “I am sorry, I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, especially not since we’re seemingly colleagues now.”

“I don’t feel uncomfortable. It’s just a lot to process, I guess. You’ve always treated me like you hate me more than anything else. You were always so rude to me. And I felt so stupid for crushing on you.” Now it was his turn to stumble over his words, eyes zoning in on your features once again. It took him a few moments to rise to his feet, rounding the table, slowly, all too slowly for your linking. No longer could you pay your thoughts any of your attention, solemnly focusing on the way he kept moving, on the darkening gaze stuck to your features. 

“I should tell you to leave before either one of us does something we can’t walk away from.” Whispers, nothing but silent whispers you didn’t reply to. You rose to your feet with trembling legs, standing close to him, oh so close. His eyes focused on your lips, a clear sign that gave you the push you needed, hand finding his.

“Don’t, don’t push me away again.” No further word was spoken, allowing a crackling silence to wrap its arms around the two of you. His big hand found your face, carefully cupping your cheek, pulling you even closer. With your breath hitched in your chest you tried to stand still, giving him enough time to ponder over his next move. But before you could give into your thoughts, wondering why he was still hesitating, Benedict had finally closed the gap between you.

The kiss was slow, though fuelled with a biting heat that made their hairs rise at the nape of your neck, forcing your hands to find his shirt, clinging to him. Slowly he turned the two of you around, pushing you onto his desk, wrapping your legs around his middle. All the emotions flushing through your veins kept forcing the two of you to keep on going, to deepen the kiss with your tongues meeting and your teeth almost clashing together. 

Quiet moans ripped through you, forcing a few chuckles out of the smirking man, allowing him to part from you for a few seconds. You didn’t need to speak any words to communicate, lips finding back together after a few moments, hearts begging one another to keep going, to finally give into the deep longing you’ve been addicted to for months. 

“You can always tell me to stop, don’t hesitate.” His soft words left your heart swelling, forcing you to nod your head before your lips searched his once again. Your hands started working on his trousers, undoing the belt of his you’ve found yourself staring at at any given chance. The cold metal felt heavy in your hands, momentarily distracting you from his wandering lips, kissing their way down your throat. “I should take my time with you, but I can’t take another single minute away from you.”

“Don’t stop, please, I need you to fuck me, been waiting for it for so long.” His chuckles vibrated on your skin, forcing goosebumps to rise. Benedict’s skilled fingers helped you out of your blouse, pushing the fabric of your skirt up to your waist, desperate to get rid of the layers of clothing keeping you separated. 

“Tell me, love, tell me how much you need me.” With your trembling hands pushing the zip of his trousers down, pulling his hardening cock free, you gave room for another gasp to leave you, finally able to feel him pressed against your skin. Your eyes flickered up to meet his before you pushed him away, giving yourself enough space to drop to your knees.

“So much, been dreaming of being touched by you for months, I touched myself to the thought of you fucking me too many times.” A deep groan left the professor, hand finding your head as you parted your lips, taking his twitching cock into your mouth. You struggled to take much of him, deeply exhaling through your nose, moving slow as your mouth tried to adjust to his size. 

His hand grasped your hair tightly, clinging to you as if you were about to slip right through his fingers. It was a sight so unreal you were no longer sure if you weren’t just stuck in another daydream. The sounds rippling through him were sinful, sounds so dreamy you hoped that this wasn’t the last time you’d get to hear them. 

You parted from him, taking a few deep breaths as your tongue flickered over his tip, letting the taste of him stick to your tongue. Every now and then your eyes met his, picking up on the pleasure swimming in his pupils, picking up on the fire simmering deep inside of him. 

Impatiently he tugged on your hair, jerking his hips to force his cock back into your mouth. You gagged around him, eyes rolling into your head to try and keep calm. Benedict started fucking your mouth, abusing the warmth engulfing him with curses rolling off his tongue. 

“Fucking hell, such a pretty sight, you on your knees for me, for me only.” You hummed around him, unable to stop your heart from skipping a few beats. He gave it a few more seconds before he pushed you away, pulling you up with trembling limbs. Once again your lips met his, sharing a sloppy kiss he used to let his hands wander, pushing your damp panties to the side, fingers exploring your dripping cunt. Your heart kept accelerating its beat, body melting in his tight grasp. “Turn around for me, love, hands on the desk.”

Almost gently you were pushed down onto the desk, front meeting the expensive wood. You heard him fumble with his clothes, seemingly ripping open a condom he rolled down on his cock before he aligned himself with your heat, slowly pushing into you from behind. The both of you gasped in unison, momentarily freezing to adjust to the sensation. 

Benedict didn’t give you another warning as he started fucking you from behind, fingertips digging into the flesh of your waist, marking you as his. Your moans kept roaring through you, reverberating through the office like a new song he was listening to for the first time, finding enjoyment in the way his heart swelled in pride. 

“You have to be quiet if you don’t want any other professors to hear how good I’m fucking you.” The way he almost growled his words had your walls clenching around his cock, teeth buried in your lower lip to try and stay quiet. Tears of desperation welled up in your eyes, hands tightening their grip on the edge of his desk, needing to hold onto something before you’d give in too soon. 

His cock kept disappearing deeper inside of you with every ferocious thrust, skin meeting yours over and over again. Your jaw muscles kept twitching, teeth forced together as he wrapped one arm around your middle, thumb circling your clit. Your body kept twitching, about to give in, hanging onto the last strands of strength before he pushed you over the edge. 

You came with a sob clawing through you, letting the intense sensation flush through your system. Benedict kept fucking you through your high, chasing his own release, set on leaving you sore for the upcoming days. With your heart still racing and your blood singing in your ears you listened to the groan leaving him as he came. 

“You don’t know how much strength it took me to not touch you on the vacation.” His words drowned out your gasps, slowly pulling out of you to throw away the used condom, slowly redressing himself. You mimicked his movements, trembling hands working on your clothes before you combed them through your hair. 

“If you’re back to being an asshole tomorrow I’ll throw a fit in the middle of the hallway, I promise you that much, professor.” 

He pulled you back to him, a smirk stamped on his lips, pressing a confident kiss on yours. “Don’t worry, I am planning on,” his lips moved to your neck, making you gasp slightly, “being incredibly good to you.” 

—-

You were not sure what you spent more time doing that semester, bending over his desk or lecturing. Regardless, you had never been more eager to go to university.

....

Liv's Note

Hope everyone enjoyed our latest collaboration! I have missed you all so much, especially as the one-year anniversary of the last chapter of AHL is approaching. I can't believe it has been so long. I promise I will come back with something soon, although you may be a little tired of the professor!fics haha so let me know if you'd like something different. Sending you all my love and can't wait to read your comments! As always reblog to support my writing :)

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Description: You don’t want to get caught up in a friends with benefits situation with Sherlock so you attempt to go on a date. Key word attempt.

Word count: 2.4k

Warnings: 18+ p in v sex, oral (male recevng) kinda shaming but not too bad.

——————————————————————————

Your intentions were never to get caught up in a friends with benefits situation with anyone, especially not with someone as peculiar as Sherlock Holmes, but that was before the worst and probably most stressful days of your lives. He had to admit he couldn’t solve a case and you barely got through the day while managing to keep your job after the mess up with authors and the books they had written, honestly there needs to be less people with the surname smith in the world. You had both found yourself collapsed and slightly drunk on the sofa of 221B, you’re not denying it wasn’t good sex. Because in all honesty it was probably the best sex you’d ever had and he clearly enjoyed it because he kept coming back for more, to be specific exactly twenty three times in the space of three and a half weeks. It was becoming clear he never really was stressed every time, but how can you reject an offer from a man so good looking. You’d always been fond of his dark curls, baby blue eyes and especially the way he sirts clung around his biceps. But you hadn’t looked at him that much? Well that was a lie you found yourself staring at him whenever you could, and he enjoyed it, especially when he mentioned it during the deed. But now it has to stop, you have a date and you’re walking down the stairs in the nicest dress you could find, because you like this guy, and that's when he saw you.

“Can we have a moment?” He stood up eyes already scanning your body

“I told you last time was the last time.” You sigh picking up your keys 

“Why?” He moans almost like a child

“Because it's not good for roommates to be in a friends with benefits situation. It causes problems.” You weren’t exactly lying, every American rom-com had explained that.

“Fine then, what if we weren’t friends? I never liked you much anyways, there's more to life than books you know. One has to open their eyes to broader horizons” he sighed moving in front of the doorway

“Good to know, now one has to go, I have a date.” You mock him as you push past. You feel his hand on your wrist stopping you in your tracks, his touch burned your skin, your body craves him.

“A date why would you do that to yourself?” He asks

“What do you mean?” You say pulling your wrist away subtly checking it to see if he really did burn you, of course he didn’t.

“Why would you want to go to a semi decent restaurant and conversate with a person you barely know and hope that they’re not just looking for a one night stand?” 

“Because I barely know him and he’s a sweet guy who can pick out a good restaurant. How would you know anyways, you’re afraid of commitment.” You snap back but he pulls you again, you can tell by the look in his eyes, somehow you were going to pay for that.

“Don’t make me order you.” His tone depended and his eyes were filled with lust. You rolled your lips together before you said your reply

“I’d like to see you try.” You gulped, never letting go of your eye contact. He let go biting the side of his cheek as he watched you leave the building, he was angry but he felt the need to ruin that confidence. He knew by the end of the night he’d have you on your knees one way or another begging for him.

———————————-

Somehow despite the slight detour of that conversation you had managed to make it to the restaurant on time. Jamie was already there dressed in a smart shirt, fitting for the restaurant you were at. His eyes lit up when he saw you.

“Hey i’m so glad we can finally do this” he stood up and made his way to your side of the table and pulled out your chair.

“Such a gentleman” you laughed as he tucked you into the table. You open the menu and he surprises you with ordering a bottle of wine for the table.

“So how is work?” He asks 

“Oh you know same old same old” you sigh

“Yeah but did you close the Anderson deal?” He pressed on

“Unfortunately not yet, but let's leave work at the door.” You ask

“For now sure.” He smiles, the rest of the date was fairly normal with all the usual things being asked. Your gaze switches from picking at your sub average food towards the man entering the building. Oh god, you could recognize those curls from a mile away. For fuck sake Sherlock. The waiter smiles warmly at him as she leads him to the table exactly next to yours.

“I think- is that, Sherlock Holmes?” Jamie exclaims

“Yup” you sigh “unfortunately so” you head falls into your palms

“Oh I didn’t expect to see you here!” He wears a fake smile as he sits down at his table shuffling his seat.

“You two know each other?” Jamie asks excitedly 

“Yes we do.” Sherlock replies looking at the menu

“Remember that weird roommate I was telling you about?” You glare at him, ensuring he knows what you’re suggesting 

“That's him, no way!” 

“This is Thai food, I thought you hated Thai food.” Sherlock looks at you “and have you not noticed the sub standard way he’s dressed along with the notebook he has to take notes to improve his publishing skills. What was it? Uhh, Jason, are you sure this is a date?” He smirks

“It's Jamie, and uh I- well maybe I was” Jamie stutters and looks over to you.

“Why are you here sherlock? And if you wanted help you could’ve just asked. Don’t lead me on for three months then take me on a crappy date.” You begin to pack up your stuff.

“Wait, please I- uh i’m sorry.” Jamie does move from his seat

“Uh huh sure looks like it, hope you enjoyed your free lesson because my meal was crap.” You look over to the manager of the restaurant who looks somewhat hurt by your words. Feeling bad you slam a £10 note on the table before storming off.

“What can I get you?” The waitress asks Sherlock.

“Sorry but change of plan.” Sherlock folds the menu up and places it on the table and hands a tip to the waitress “sorry for the trouble” he smiles and follows you out of the restaurant.

———————————

You stood outside the door to baker street red with anger, not only did he push his way into the date, but he also ruined it. Yeah maybe it was a bad way but it was supposed to be a way to get over his stupid dick, not that he needed to know that.

“I’m sorry, my intentions weren’t-

“Don’t start that Sherlock, you’re a good detective but a shit liar.” You huff pushing through the door.

“Well i was unsure given how you left” he followed you up the stairs, you stopped in your tracks. Oh he’s really done it now.

“How i left?” You sighed, Sherlock stood back slightly he’d never seen you like this before “you mean me telling you didn’t wanna be your stress relief anymore and actually trying to be an adult. What were you so unsure about? Please enlighten me.”

“How about the past three weeks of practically begging on your knees for me?” He snapped back

“Oh yeah sure because it only takes one person to fuck, how about last week or about two hours ago if I remember correctly, do you want me to go on. I told you we can’t do it anymore! Why do you think I was on this date?!” You paused knowing you’d said too much

“What are you talking about?” He tilts his head

“I may have only gone on this date because I didn’t want to think what we had was becoming something else, you don’t do all these normal people things.” You laugh to yourself “I was trying to get over your dick.” 

“Why should you?” He stepped closer, you took a stepback back until you hit the wall.

“What do you mean?” You ask, he answered swiftly by latching his lips to yours, pining you between him and the wall, your lips part as he pushes his tongue through causing you to send a whimper into his mouth

“Just admit it, you need me. I know I need you.” He picked you up and you wrapped your legs around his waist, he carried you into the apartment and dropped you against the door where he began to take off your clothes. You reached to undo the buttons of his shirt and he smacked your desperate hands away.

“Why?” You whimpered 

“Because you wanted someone else, you denied me of what i wanted. Now you have to wait for what you want, until I decide you’re forgiven.” His eyes were dark with lust as he pawed your body removing your layers. He turned you around and spread your legs apart. You heard the familiar sound of his belt unbuckling and then the tingling sensation of him rubbing his cock up and down your slick folds. He entered you with one hard thrust causing your face to press into the hard wood of the door as he fucked you.

“Fuck-sherlock plea-“ he cut you off covering your mouth with his hand.

“Wouldn’t want Mrs Hudson to hear now do we?” He continued his movement causing the door to rattle, he rubbed against the soft spot inside, his thickness and curve entered you perfectly. His cock rubbed your insides just right, tightening the coil inside you.

“F-fuck Sherlock. Gonna cum.” You whimper as he grunts, pushing you closer to your release. 

“Fuck- so tight.” He moaned. Your body’s heat began to rise as you grew ever closer to you release, he let it build up gripping harder and pushing deeper waiting, until he stopped. He pulled himself out, wiping the sweat from his brow and straightening his collar. 

“What the hell?” You turned around watching as he sat in his chair tucking his hardness away.

“I’m stopping you from getting what you wanted.” He said holding his hands together in his usual pose

“Why would you do that?” You ask slightly irritated at the mess he left you in

“You did it to me, I thought it was only fair.” He tilts his head pulling a sarcastic smirk.

“You’re a drama queen.” You walk over to him “and an ass” you kneel between his legs “and you’re-“ 

“Choose your next words wisely.” His hand gripped your chin pushing your lips together. You gripped his wrists and pulled them away, snaking your hands down his thighs, back to his hardness.

“And you’re incredibly jealous.” You say with a smile, his thighs clenched as your hands run over his crotch and unbuckling his belt. He let out a long sigh as you took his cock into your hands. You pumped him for a moment, allowing his body to relax into the chair before circling your tongue around his tip, your saliva mixing with the salty taste of precum dripping from him. You licked a stripe up his shaft eventually sinking your mouth down, swallowing as much as you could.

“That's it, take it all for me, good girl.” He hissed, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. You bobbed up and down moaning onto him, sending vibrations down his shaft.  You pulled back up, sucking on his tip and pumping him with your hand. His thighs clenched as he pushed you away. “Not yet, can’t cum too soon.”

“Why? can't go again?” You smile

“Don’t ask stupid questions love.” He sniped back as you straddled his waist “you gonna cum around my cock” he watched as you placed your entrance above his hardness.

“You going to let me this time? Or are you- shit!” You yelped out as he thrusted up into you. You panted over him as you sunk down pushing him deeper

“What's wrong? Cat got your tongue?” He smirked and began pushing back up into you as you grinded along with the pace. Your hands gripped his shoulders to steady yourself as the motion rocked his chair. His lips traced your jawline down to your neck, he sucked leaving red marks along your neckline. His arm wrapped around your waist allowing him to hold you up as he thrusted hard into you.

“Fuck sherlock , j-just like that.” You whispered as he cock pushed deeper rubbing perfectly on that sweet spot inside. He groaned at the sensation of your walls tightening around him.

“Fuck, you gonna cum on my cock, soak it, just the way i like it.” He moaned moving his thumb to your swollen clit adding to the sensation. The chair began to rock and creak with the motion of your bodies colliding.

“Oh god Sh-Sherlock gonna cum.” You squealed as your body clenched around him, his touch burned your skin. You needed him, the way he made you feel didn’t even come close to the way anyone else could.

“I bet Jamie couldn’t make you look like this, paralysed over my cock.” He let out a groan as his pace stuttered. “You want me to cum pretty girl?”  

“Yes, please, I want it.” You begged rocking on his lap.

“Where do you want it pretty girl?” He grunted

“In me, please, I want you to fill me up. Sherlock please, I need it. All yours, only you.” 

“I’ll give it to you- fuck. Gonna paint your insides white.” He bit down on your shoulder, lavishing you neck with kisses as he came, the squelching sound of him pushing his thick white ropes further into you filled the room. You stopped rocking, resting your brow on his with a smile, his eyes locked on yours before he leaned in for an exhausted sloppy kiss. He pulled away admiring the marks he left on your neck.

“What?” You asked as he traced his fingers around them.

“Now when you or anyone else looks at these, they’ll know you’re mine.” He smirked as you sighed 

“Your arrogance will be the death of me”