#being dumped

-after being rejected-

Venus: *in retrograde*

Can I just vent over here for a sec? Thanks Tumblr fam.

So Saturday night I texted my now ex boyfriend because things seemed a little off lately. I essentially said, “Are we okay?” He responded with a long reply so I was like how about we talk on the phone a bit later about this when I can give you my full attention. Skip ahead to later and I call him. We talk for a bit and he essentially gives me a bullshit “it’s not you, it’s me” speech and that “you deserve better” (which I do but that’s not the point here).

Long story short he breaks up with me over the phone. OVER THE PHONE. I actually just realized that he broke up with me on our one month of being official (exclusive boyfriend/girlfriend), which is totally shitty. 

I mean it’s not like I wasn’t considering breaking up with him. After our last date on Wednesday it was almost as if he wasn’t there and I left the date thinking about breaking up with him. Lately he hadn’t been responding to my texts like he usually would and I was usually the one who would forget to text back. I’m not needy but the way he acted towards me completely changed and I wasn’t liking it at all. (I also wasn’t enjoying kissing him as much and I kind of wasn’t attracted to the way he smelled.. but that’s a whole different problem) 

Anyway, instead of just breaking up with him right away, I decided to ask him about it, like a mature human being. But he decides to break up with me over the freaking phone. I would have never broken up with him over the phone. What kind of person does that?! It’s break up 101 not to do that!!! Don’t be a shitty person and have the common courtesy to break up with someone in person. Doing it over the phone (talking or texting) makes it hurt even worse for the person you’re breaking up with, making them think that you never cared about them to begin with. Yes, breaking up with someone in person is awkward and just kind of the worst but coming from someone who’s going through a break up right now, just do it in person.

I’m probably not taking the breakup well because of two things. Number one. I’ve never been broken up with, I’ve always been the one to end things with the other person. The loss of power in the situation is really getting to me and I’m kind of wishing that I did it first. Number two. My body has fantastic timing and I’m sick right now. Whenever I’m sick, I have absolutely no control over my emotions.Well, at least I’m not on my period right now.

Okay, well I’m done. If you read this cool, I hope you learned something about not being shitty and thanks for listening to my rants. Feel free to share your shitty break up stories as well or cheer me up with animal gifs. If you’re my older sister who follows me on tumblr, “Don’t worry I’m fine. I just can’t sleep right now because my cough is the literal worst and I’m feeling pretty self pitying at the moment. I just needed to get this out, it’s kind of therapeutic for me.”

In conclusion, I do deserve better than someone who can’t even give me the common courtesy of breaking up with me in person. I have already deleted his number and unfollowed/unfriended/unadded him on all social media. I will be okay and I will move on when I’m ready. 

First, let me tell you a thing. You are not a bad lover for saying no to sex.

Love is not about sex.

If sex is his priority in a relationship, he doesn’t really want a relationship. He wants someone to have sex with. Sex is a plus in a relationship. It’s something that brings both partners joy and gratification; however, without it, the love would still be there and the relationship would still be emotionally satisfying. There are people out there who needs sexual gratification and it’s fine. It’s fine to be a sexual person. It’s not fine, however, to shame someone who isn’t. You’re not a bad lover for being asexual. You’re just not a match for him. 

Please know that. Know that this isn’t about you not being enough. This is about two pieces of two different puzzles. 

I’m sorry he broke up with you but I hope you realise that this was for the best. You deserve someone who is happy being with you out of the reason that you’re together rather than sex alone. I hope that you find someone who loves you for all that you are and accept you for all that you are. I hope that you find someone like that. 

Always by your side,

You broke me, you broke my heart 💔

And now, a month after break up, you think it’s okay to send me kisses 😘 ........ it’s not.

Please, the only thing I want from you are my clothes.... nothing more, the only thing I ask you for und you response with kisses.