#backtocollege

It's my favorite time of the year, after exams' day where I can finally sleep, lol.

It' September and I'll be back to college in 1 and half a week. So I'm taking my time to organize everything for college and all around.

Here it's my Notion Home page, do you want to help me adding movies and readings to my lists?

There are seasons in life when you don’t realize how far you’ve drifted from yourself until you finally stop and take a long, honest look back. For me, that realization came after years of chasing a career that drained more out of me than it gave. What started as ambition slowly turned into exhaustion, and what I once thought of as “success” began to feel more like a cage. Burnout wasn’t just tiredness—it was a kind of silence, an emptiness where my creativity used to live. I had entered a cycle that left little room for me to breathe, let alone to create.

Art had always been a part of me, but during those years, it became something distant, something I told myself I would return to “when I had time.” The irony, of course, was that the more I poured myself into a toxic career, the further I strayed from the one thing that gave me life. I silenced my passion, thinking practicality was the wiser choice, but in truth, it was like dimming a light I desperately needed.

The turning point didn’t arrive in a single moment—it came gradually, in quiet realizations that the life I was living was unsustainable. I remember the heaviness of waking up and feeling dread before the day had even begun. I remember the constant tug inside me, reminding me that I wasn’t living in alignment with who I truly was. Reflection, as painful as it was, forced me to see that if I didn’t reclaim my art, I would lose not just my career, but myself.

Choosing to step away was terrifying. It meant admitting that what I had built wasn’t working, and that I had to start again. But in that space of uncertainty, something remarkable happened—I found my way back to art. Returning to college to further my passion wasn’t simply about education; it was about renewal. It was an act of trust, a belief that I could rebuild on my own terms and that it was never too late to begin again.

Back in the classroom, surrounded by creativity and possibility, I started to breathe differently. For the first time in years, I felt alive in my work. I wasn’t just learning technique—I was rediscovering joy. The brushstrokes, the colors, the critiques, even the long nights hunched over projects felt like medicine for my soul. I was no longer just producing; I was becoming.

Looking back now, I see that the burnout, as difficult as it was, served a purpose. It broke me down so that I could rebuild more authentically. It reminded me that passion is not optional—it’s the very thing that keeps me moving forward. My journey hasn’t been linear, but it’s honest. Every misstep and detour taught me to protect my creativity fiercely and to never let it get buried beneath someone else’s definition of success.

As I reflect on this path, I carry both gratitude and resolve. Gratitude for the lessons that came with struggle, and resolve to keep choosing art, even when the world tells me otherwise. Because at the heart of it all, art is not just what I do—it’s who I am. And this return is only the beginning.

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