#azores

we emerged victorious from our travails (in that all people and luggage are present and accounted for if somewhat worse for the wear) and i have received my reward (a mediocre ham and cheese sandwich and my most beloved kima maracujá)

because azoreans are caricatures of ourselves the biggest airport in the islands is joão paulo ii (john paul ii). like after the pope. the same pope my mom’s favorite cousin is also named after. we’ve got one move and the move is catholcism

i should really get a portuguese passport. i don’t want to, bc portuguese bureaucracy makes american bureaucracy look quaint and also my mom made a nemesis of one of the functionaries at the portuguese consulate which likely won’t improve the experience, but i really should

also also. while we were boarding there were very few portuguese ppl in line bc we’re flying united rather than tap/sata (bc my mom is in a fight to the death for her honor with tap. it’s a whole thing) and i said smthg like yeah the americans prob didn’t want to fly with the livestock and my mom was VERY offended and i was like ??? i was not stereotyping us, i have been on sata planes with geese before—not in a while but it’s a fairly memorable experience—and she was like well FIRST of all they were chickens and secondly you wouldn’t be saying that if they were falcons and i was like. well no but i am quite confident that nobody’s gonna be eating the falcons. and am relatively confident that somebody’s gonna be eating the chickens. and she was like I Don’t Want To Talk About This Anymore

also and this is so not the point but the anglophone pilot keeps calling são miguel “san miguel” and i think the approximately three to five actual azoreans on this flight should be allowed to tar and feather him