#avoiding sh

one way ive managed to help alleviate this is w the classic drawing on myself (especially w red ink or paint) but also, ive recently learned that if i watch a slasher film it satisfies it in a way that i'm not physically hurt. if you can stomach it. even just the original scream or something like that...it rlly helps for my urges in particular

[PT:  can't figure out asks (new to Tumblr) /End PT]

saw the request for things that have helped you so thought I could add, but can’t find where asks are -_- I suck at this website-

I think a big part of eventually mostly stopping for me (it’s been a few months by my count which feels huge) was kind of accepting that this is a thing that happens and yeah it’s probably going to be a thing that happens for the rest of my life.

it’s scary that it feels like it won’t ever go away, and initially when I first had a relapse after a good stretch clean back in August I felt really hopeless? like it would be with me forever. I would always feel like this no matter how hard I tried. like I was permanently broken or something. accepting that it’s a part of my life and trying to let go of the shame around it was a big step and it’s still something I’m working on. but it helped especially for me to be able to tell someone when I relapsed.

I actually told someone for the first time that time in august. just having someone who you can tell and don’t have to keep it hidden from is a relief. someone who won’t judge you for it or start treating you like you’re made of glass or something.

this is applicable only really if you’re concerned with hiding wounds/scars though I think.

it’s pretty obvious also but working to kind of develop more self-esteem/be less of an ass to myself, being able to realize there’s a future. But that part does come with doing better in general so not a place to start with I think. something more along the lines of saying ‘it doesn’t matter if I think I deserve nothing but hurt. I’m getting something else anyways.’ like using being an ass to yourself in a good (?) way.

I think it would have been really useful for me to have something like this when I was cutting regularly because I was in retrospect really, really unsafe about it. I would use unsanitary tools, didn’t take care of the wounds, and multiple times sh’d in public bathrooms. I don’t think I ever got a serious infection somehow, despite depth. if I’d had tools to make those things less bad, or a way to structure working myself off of it, there might have been less hard of a fight. so thank you for running this.

I felt so sick to my stomach the craving to relapse was so hard it was sickening. I felt so much anxiety and sickness and restless its insane how self harm really is that addicting.

Hi anon, I'm working writing something on my website with more info on avoiding self-harm which will have more alternatives but here are some ideas I though of for now

Sour candy

Acupuncture rings/rollers

Keeping a list of reasons not to sh on your phone/a small notebook to read when you're struggling

Writing about how you feel on your phone/a small notebook

Fatal to the Flesh, a website where you can draw cuts

Deep heat/IcyHot/Bengay/Tiger balm/etc. roll on, it's used to treat pain but also creates a burning sensation. Never heard of anyone else using this but it helps me

Progressive muscle relaxation

Listen to music

Read random Wikipedia articles

What I think helped me get through it at the beginning was having a safe person. Everyone only told me what I was doing was wrong and I needed to stop. Finally, I met someone who simply listened to me. He suggested other ways to relieve the tension. He were there for me, giving me the opportunity to vent. So that's the first important thing, I think: understanding and non-judgment. When I feel like self-harm, drinking cold water helps me. I also like to put on music and hum/sing something that's highly emotional. I often write in my journal during these states. And maybe conversations might be helpful, but I rarely want to talk at such times. In such very bad states, minor self-harm does occur. Then I simply hit my body with something, usually around my hands. Usually, no injuries occur. But despite everything, I feel like it's a bit like addiction – it will always be something I can return to and do again. It's simply a familiar way of coping. I think it's worth considering this long-term, to teach people how to simply cope with stress.

In the long run, I think that improving my personal situation, having a supportive person, and writing helped me most. I learned to respond, be assertive, and I developed as a person. This is probably why self-harm isn't as common in adults. I think the solution may lie in teaching young people how to manage their own minds and situations, raising their self-esteem, finding resources within themselves and their surroundings.

Cutting itself made me feel somehow cool; I had something to care for (the wounds), something to look up to. I was proud of them, even though I had to hide them. This feeling of carrying a secret, of being hurt and broken ultimately appealed to me. Maybe there's a deeper reason here too? I don't know.

My research also shows that self-harm is often linked to other types of disorders – substance use and eating disorders. Therefore, all factors need to be considered individually and from a broader perspective.

I really like your idea and work. If you have any more questions or need help, let me know!

Best regards

i only let myself cut during the evening, 8-9pm. before that is too risky (i could get caught), after that my body is too tired to not possibly do it sloppily

by the time the hours come, the urge usually is gone or i forget, so i just don't relapse. keep going clean for months by accident

Any ideas for how I could handle it better when it's bad without having to spill blood? :(

Cause when it's really bad it feels like the only thing that might help, and idk.. fastest ig.. I need more patience

Hi anon, for some people the reason self-harm can help with anxiety is that the pain and injury 'shocks' your body/mind out of the anxiety. Trying other ways to shock yourself out of the anxiety can help as an alternative, for example splashing cold water on your face, eating something that's very spicy or sour, doing exercise, watching horror movies with jump scares, etc. Here is a list of a bunch of grounding techniques that might be helpful as well. Unfortunately this doesn't help with the underlying reasons you are anxious, but it can help you with your anxiety quickly.

When you are feeling a bit better and less like you need something that helps immediately, writing, talking, or making art about how you are feeling could help you understand why you are anxious and then come up with more practical ways of dealing with that anxiety or what is causing it. Some people find mindfulness helpful for dealing with anxiety and self-harm, but this can be hard to start and can take practice.

the good thing abt eyeshadow compared to pen or paint is it comes off really easily so it isnt super visible to others if ur worried about that.

i also used a tens unit. it's this thing that uses an electrical current or something and helps relieve pain (great 4 period cramps) but the slightly stingy/tingly sensation also helps to mimic the sensation of sh 👍