#autistic post

loving your autistic self is hard

I'm at book number two of the Discworld series and lately discovered a YouTube video about the Discworld Audiobook which features Indira Varma, Peter Serafinowicz, BILL NIGHY, Colin Morgan, Andy Serkis, Sian Clifford and many others. And yes, Brenda, I know every line of the video already.

I can't wait to hyper-fixate on the entire series, learn every line and every character's voice, and shout them out loud at random moments during the day.

I JUST. CAN'T. WAIT.

Sometimes Wilson wonders if he could not see House, in all of the older man’s glory. Last night, when he saw House in his sweatshirt, he couldn’t bring himself to ask the older man to take it off. It seemed right when he saw House in the grey McGill shirt, a piece of him on the person he cared about so much more than he realized.

But, let’s not say House is blind, because he’s not, not when it comes to Wilson, never when it comes to Wilson. He notices how Wilson steals his Mint and Wood cologne whenever he’s out of his own. He knows Wilson gets a lot of money for simply being a person who tells other people they have cancer cells slowly eating away at them, so he has enough to get more. He notices how Wilson smiles whenever House says something rude to push people out as if he was reeling Wilson in instead.

Now, House was lying on his carpet, aware of Wilson’s shuffling in the shared office. Wilson mutters something, or at least House believes it something irrelavent for his job.Wilson gets up and sits next to House on the floor. “I know you know House,” Wilson wasn’t looking at his ‘friend’. House sighs and gives a smile. “Yep, your pining is clear as daylight” He responds, no malice in his tone at all which made Wilson turn to him. His breath hitches “How long have you known?” House freezes when he saw the two clear drops in Wilson’s eyes. 

House stares, he should lie right? Say he didn’t know, act like he was confused, but he couldn’t. “Two Years,” House states, honestly. Wilson doesn’t say anything but he should’ve known House would’ve found out. House watches Wilson’s brown eyes and sighs. “It’s not something I w-was expecting, but I should have known you’d find out” Wilson looked so vulnerable, his brown eyes were so much more capable of emotion then House’s icy blue ones.

“You're an idiot,” House said, repeating the same thing Wilson had once said to him. Wilson looked down, “I know, I’m a shame to humanity” Wilson was obviously feeling like he was the only one in love with a man who didn’t care about people’s feelings, but even House was able to love “Your, my shame to humanity,” House pauses, “You should see what I see, James,” House shuffles closer to Wilson, putting his head in Wilson’s lap.

1) over explaining

2) having trouble explaining because you can't pinpoint words or feelings

3) short answers

😖