#astrosmash

Intellivision on a Atari 2600 storage box.

One of the Tron games for the Intellivision, Tron: Solar Sailer from 1983, makes use of the “Intellivoice” attachment, to give the game several different voice clips that are to some extent part of the actual gameplay (for example Yori saying a string of numbers that you have to type in). One of these clips is of the Master Control Program saying “I can’t allow it!”

Now, the people developing the game noted that the way the Intellivoice pronounces the word “can’t” makes it sound like another word, “cunt”. According to one version of the story I've read, the brought their concerns to management, who ignored it, causing the developers to go “Oh yeah? We’ll show them!” Another version says that the digital mispronunciation simply became an in-joke among the developers.

Whatever the case might be, they decided to create an alternate version of another Intellivision game, Astrosmash, named… “Space Cunt”. Complete with edited graphics: The title screen says “Genitaliavision”, the spaceship is a penis shooting sperm, and the enemies are named “Cunt”, “The Pill”, “I.U.D.” and “Spermicide”. Curiously enough, one of the enemies (presumably the “Cunt”) actually looks like Recognizers from Tron. And of course, it uses the Intellivoice to proudly announce “MATTEL ELECTRONICS PRESENTS: SPACE CUNT.”

No, I am not making this up. This was an actual game that was produced on actual cartridges, though obviously not to be sold to the public, but rather as an in-joke among the developers. Fortunately, this piece of sordid gaming history has been preserved for future generations. You can download it for use in an emulator, or even play it directly in your browser over at the Internet Archive. Or maybe you can just watch this gameplay video, complete with the introductory screen and voice:

Some statuary for the Brutalist Sculpture Garden that one of Wassnabeu’s gangs call home, inspired by Atari-era sprites. Real ones for comparison:

Smash Hit, grinning: I’m stuff.

High Volt: This is not what I meant by “getting to know eachother better”.

Astroblast: Hey guys, I was doing… stuff..

Smash Hit: (grinning) I’m stuff.