#aspd support

u mentioned that labeling emotions is difficult for u lol but i guess im asking if you would consider your life is fulfilling or wether ur aspd symptoms specifically are still making it difficult and tedious, sad, just not enjoyable idk whatever. for instance, if u experience chronic understimulation that is too bad to find enjoyment in life, if ur life conditions are bad bc of impulsivity / crime-comitting / etc and whatever. i hope this is a clear question lmao i guess im kinda trying to give myself hope that if this is not "just a phase" i will still live a comfortable life but idk lmao

Studies indicate that a teenagehood onset of conduct disorder is more likely to cool down at adulthood. This may indeed be "just a phase" with some extreme forms of teenage rebellion. Childhood onset it is more likely that the traits remain throughout life. You know better than me which one it is. But do not worry too much about it. Science and education get better, and so will be ways to treat that disorder. And, as you pointed out, your life decisions will also impact how you turn out eventually.

Understimulation is indeed a thing, but I learned to combat it by doing something new. It can only be better than before, and once that got boring too, I may go back to something I did before - for example my work. But sometimes I worry what to do once I finished everything I find exciting. At some point, I will probably just off myself. But this day is still far away! It is just neat to have the option though. Not only we ourselves, but also the people around us contribute to change and new perspectives. New stories, new places, different sensations, sometimes we have to wait a little and new things will arrive soon.

Criminal activities are closely tied to your abilities and opportunities. You cannot break in, if you never learned how to lock pick. If you worry about crimes, keep an eye out what type of people you are surrounding yourself. Shady people make a request for robbing a Gas station much more likely than a bunch of nerds. You may be too lazy or incompetent to get the requirements for a robbery, but with friends around, it might be easy and oooops, you are in trouble. So perhaps you better hang out with the nerds, right?

Both gang members and nerds have some entertainment to offer, but one is socially accepted, the other is a way to jail. If you are aware of your own faults, you work yourself around it. If you know you sometimes take random side-steps, do not get close to the cliff.

Impulsivity means that we often act before we think things through. Putting as many steps between yourself and a stupid action is the best thing you can do. For example, I do not touch guns! Okay, okay there have been exceptions, but in general I try to avoid people and stores and other opportunity to get one. If no gun is available, a lot of stupid things are much harder to do, you know? More steps between me and the cliff. Social environment plays an important role in this.

I would also add another advise for your future, because I wished someone had told me. If you ever get into a relationship you care about, do not (!) ever break up or make a threat about breaking up, in any emotional moment! Be it a friendship, a romantic relationship, or whatever. In the spurt of a moment, during a verbal fight, or just a stressful situation, one may feel nothing but annoyance or rage. Some pwASPD have a very limited emotional range. As such, you may feel only resentment for that person. However (!), non-ASPD people store multiple emotions at once.

A sister of mine explained it to me like that. If she gets into an argument with a person she loves, she may hate the person during the moment of the argument, but because they love them in general, they consider future perspectives and moments, having hope for reconciliation, and a limitation on what they are willing to say and to do to them. In other words, positive emotions still linger dorment behind the anger. I feel only the dominant emotion.

I only have one or maybe two emotions at once and little to no future insights. As such, if I get into a fight with someone - even if I cared about that person in the past, and would do so in the future - at the moment, I only experience hate, I only see an enemy, and I am gonna treat them like an enemy. My reaction acts accordingly. However, hitting them, or even just verbally breaking up, will cause irreparable damage to the relationship. Do not give in into that emotion!

I did not know that! I thought I could just tell in a stressful moment, when a friend pisses me off,that I break up our friendship and want nothing to do with them anymore, and tell them that I am fine again 5 minutes later after I calmed down. This - does - NOT - work! Because, at least I assume, for socials, the entire emotional cluster they associate with you breaks at that moment.

We may have only one emotion at the moment, but they have all the other associated emotions in mind during the fight, and all of them shatter, if you break up, insult, or leash out. You may say sorry, but the trust will never be the same. It is like glued glass, which you can try to reconstruct but the cracks remain visible.

What I found working for me was trying to dissociate or to disengage with the situation. Sometimes, just running away, and hoping that no person gives a stupid fuck, cause a second time I will not be able to distract myself. I may break things (or people), but it is at least not my people and not my things. At best, run somewhere less populated, and just run.

What I think helps in general with impulsivity is to distract yourself! Find something more important thatn the striking impulse. It is said that pwASPD are extremely reward driven. Some theorize that our lack of empathy and anxiety derives mostly from this tunnel vision for reward. If you watch yourself doing something stupid, remind yourself of something better. Do not (!) try to calm down by thinking about consequences, punishment, or anything bad, because it may accelerates excitement and hence the action.

In reality, it can look like this: I have a promising appointment in half an hour. Now I am at the groceries. There is a good chance to leave the place with a little fun. However, if I do this, I may not be able to go to the even much more rewarding appointment. So, I may just stick to the plan which leads to a chance to enhance my career. At least for me, this often works.

I hope I could give you some perspectives that having ASPD does not necessarily mean that your life will be largely free rent one room apartment with bars in front of the window. I know quite a few successful pwASPD, who also had a more exciting life than most people I know, but still turned out fine.

my really close friend just got diagnosed with aspd, what can i do to support them?

also if you have any resources on aspd i could read that would be very handy to me too :)

ODD is such a weird one that they tried to diagnose me because I refused to automatically respect someone just because they were older or a figure of authority when that's not what ODD is at all. I wouldn't say that ODD is even anywhere necessary for ASPD considering it's it's own other disorder, so before I touch that let me try to like give a summary of what Oppositional Defiance Disorder is first.

Oppositional Defiant Disorder, or ODD, is often misunderstood when people talk about it in the context of antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). ODD is a diagnosis given to children and adolescents who show a consistent pattern of behaviors such as arguing with adults, deliberately refusing to follow rules, being easily annoyed while also purposefully annoying others, and holding grudges or being spiteful. It’s not simply a matter of a child being difficult — ODD is only diagnosed when these behaviors cause significant disruption in school, at home, or in friendships.

The important thing to understand is that ODD is not always a lifelong condition. Research shows that about two-thirds of children diagnosed with ODD improve significantly within a few years if they receive treatment, and many see their symptoms resolve entirely. However, about one-third of children, particularly those whose symptoms emerge very early or who never receive support, may continue to experience difficulties into adulthood.

Where confusion often comes in is the link between ODD and ASPD. ODD itself is not a precursor to ASPD. The DSM criteria for ASPD require evidence of conduct disorder before age fifteen, and conduct disorder is a more severe diagnosis than ODD. While untreated ODD can, in some cases, escalate into conduct disorder, it does not automatically do so. Conduct disorder is the condition that is more directly tied to ASPD, not ODD. This distinction matters, because treating ODD as “mini ASPD” oversimplifies both diagnoses and creates unnecessary stigma. ODD is better understood as a risk factor if untreated, not as a guaranteed step on the path to ASPD.

This leads into the question you asked: what happens if someone did have ODD-like or conduct disorder-like symptoms as a child, but those symptoms were never officially documented — often because of parental neglect, abuse, or a lack of access to medical care? In those cases, how does an adult seeking an ASPD diagnosis move forward? Are they simply left hoping a doctor believes their self-report?

In practice, psychiatric diagnoses don’t rely exclusively on childhood medical records. While documented history can be extremely helpful, it’s not the only form of evidence considered. Psychiatrists and psychologists often have to piece together a person’s developmental history from multiple sources, and self-reporting plays a major role.

If someone never had their ODD-like or conduct disorder-like behaviors formally recognized due to neglect, abuse, or lack of access to care, there are still other ways that history can be supported. Witness accounts are one option — a parent, sibling, extended family member, or even an old friend who observed the behaviors firsthand can sometimes provide confirmation. Teachers, school counselors, or other authority figures who were present during childhood may also be valuable references, though not everyone has access to those connections as an adult. Even written records, like old school notes describing behavioral issues, suspension slips, or reports of defiance and truancy, can serve as indirect documentation.

That being said, clinicians are trained to evaluate not just external evidence, but also how a patient describes their own history. A consistent, detailed self-report of childhood behavior often carries weight, especially if the patterns described align with what is already well-documented in the DSM. In many cases, doctors understand that children from neglectful or abusive households are the least likely to have their struggles formally documented, and they take that into account.

So the answer isn’t simply “hope the doctor believes you.” It’s more that diagnosis becomes a collaborative process. A strong self-report, ideally supported by even one or two outside confirmations, can be enough. The most important factor is that the presentation of behaviors is consistent — both across time (childhood into adulthood) and across perspectives (how you describe yourself versus how others saw you).

This of course, will vary person to person, and if you don't have any proper documentation of conduct disorder there's definitely ways to get supporting evidence, or even just self reporting your behaviors (being honest) in psychiatric evaluation. However, I personally wouldn't be seeking out an ASPD diagnosis, as someone who did get diagnosed.

And this reasoning really just comes down to what that label actually means in practice. Unlike something like ADHD, autism, or depression, having “ASPD” in your medical record doesn’t usually open doors to treatment, support groups, or accommodations. If anything, it often closes them. Many clinicians are openly wary of working with ASPD patients — not necessarily out of malice, but because the disorder is heavily stigmatized, poorly understood, and rarely targeted with specific therapeutic programs.

For most people, an ASPD diagnosis doesn’t change the kind of help they can access. The therapeutic approaches that are useful for people with ASPD (like DBT, CBT, or trauma-focused therapy) are the same ones that can be accessed under other diagnoses, without the additional stigma. What the ASPD label often adds instead is a red flag in your file that can follow you for life; affecting not just healthcare, but sometimes even legal proceedings or employment if records are ever subpoenaed.

It’s also important to remember that ASPD is considered a “forensic” diagnosis as much as a clinical one. In other words, it exists as much to explain criminal behavior in courtrooms as it does to guide treatment in therapy rooms. That dual role makes it especially loaded. For someone genuinely struggling with antisocial traits, the risk is that chasing the label ends up creating more barriers than it removes.

That doesn’t mean self-understanding isn’t valuable. If you recognize ASPD traits in yourself, you can still learn strategies to manage them, find community with others who relate, and access therapies that help regulate behavior and build stability. But an official stamp of “ASPD” isn’t usually what unlocks those things — and in fact, it can sometimes make them harder to access.