ive realized a lot of my mental health issues are involving my family and my family is kinda emotionally abusive and homophobic (im a closeted bi girl) and really uneducated on mental health, they dont wanna learn abt it either so theyre ignorant too. i dont know what to do because the only way i can see all the problems going away is me moving out but im only 16 so thats not possible im just so lost but im struggling so much im scared ill be really depressed one day and do something. tag asd123
Heyasd123,I’m sorry to hear about that! I had a lot of mentalissues come from my family and even after I realized that, I had tolive with them for four more years. I wish I could say that I wasable to change how they felt about the issues that were important tome, but I think that they actually got worse over time. They refusedto learn about things, and they would only stick to what they thoughwas correct. They were incredibly judgmental and abusive, and I stillhave to deal with some of the issues they caused me to have. Thereare a couple of things you can do to make living with them easier.Try to make an escape for yourself. I used to hide in my room and goand read for hours. That gave me a way and a place to escape intoother worlds people had created. Video games are also a really goodway to do that, as they help you get involved in participating in theworld you’re escaping too. Another thing that helps me isto journal about the issues I would experience of my family. Thatgave me a place to rant about anything without being afraid of whatthey would say if I talked about it. I could write anything andexpress my feelings, and I wouldn’t get in trouble because of it.Doing that was actually really liberating, so I recommend giving it atry.Also, have you looked into emancipating yourself? Idon’t know what country you are in, but if you are in the US, if youcan prove that you can financially care for yourself, you can takelegal custody of yourself before you are 18. The exact rules for itdepend on what state you’re in. If you’re out of the U.S., you mightbe able to do that, but I’m not sure if it is called something else.Either way, you should start looking into getting a job. It’ll helpyou save up for when you are ready to move out, and it’ll give you agood excuse to not be home very much. I know there are plenty ofplaces that hire when you are 16. It might take some time, but keepapplying to places until you get a job. Good luck witheverything, and we’re always here to help!“What weachieve inwardly will change outer reality.”~Mel
You’re getting two answers, because I didn’t realise Mel had already answered your ask!
Hi darling,
I’m really sorry to hear that you have to deal with all of this lovely! It’s definitely really difficult when you’re not of age to move out yet and you don’t feel like it’s possible for your family to change. I think what’s important is to look into ways to make this as manageable as possible. This can mean that you keep trying to educate them on mental health issues and things like that, or it can mean that you stop doing that and try to let their comments affect you as little as possible. It really depends on what you feel would help you most personally.
Since you’re 16, I’m assuming you’re still in school? I think it would be really good if you could talk to the school counsellor there about what’s been going on. Even though they probably aren’t able to change the situation, it can really help to have someone you can talk to and to support you. You don’t have to go through this all by yourself. I tried to go through my struggles all alone, and it just really didn’t go well. When I reached out and opened up to someone I trusted, it felt more bearable, if that makes sense? And I would really like for your struggles to feel more bearable for you!
I also think it can be helpful to start arranging some things for when you do move out. When you move out, there are a lot of things you need, ranging from forks to tea towels to a bed and literally anything in between. The small things you can start collecting already, so that you don’t need to spend a lot of money on them when you move out, because you’ll probably need your money for other things then. Not only is this practically helpful, but it can also be a way of lifting up your spirits, as it helps you focus on a more positive future, even if it’s still a bit further away. It kind of gives you something to look forward to, and that’s never a bad thing.
I really wish there was something I could think of that would change this whole situation, but I hope that this answer still was at least a little bit helpful. If there’s anything else we can help with, please let us know! Take care of yourself lovely!
Sometimes what seems impossible, is just hard.
Keep fighting beautiful ❤
Love Pauline


















