#arrival fallacy

Well being without illusion begins with a refusal, not a negation of joy or meaning, but a refusal to accept the metaphysics of arrival that saturates contemporary life. The promise of arrival is the central narcotic of late capitalist civilisation. It organises desire, structures labour, justifies exhaustion, and renders suffering tolerable by endlessly deferring fulfilment into an imagined…

In the pursuit of happiness, success, or fulfillment, many of us focus on the idea of “arriving” at a destination. Whether it’s landing a dream job, finding the perfect relationship, or achieving personal goals, we often believe that when we reach this final point, everything will magically fall into place. However, there’s a psychological concept known as the arrival fallacy, which challenges…

Teaching high school students, I see how quickly they want to grow up. They think that once they leave high school, their parents’ home, and all the rules, that’s when their life will start. That’s when it’ll all be ‘better.’ Watching this play out year after year, it struck me that high school students eager to graduate are not the only ones suffering from the disease of “if only.” So many of…

Teaching high school students, I see how quickly they want to grow up. They think that once they leave high school, their parents’ home, and all the rules, that’s when their life will start. That’s when it’ll all be ‘better.’ Watching this play out year after year, it struck me that high school students eager to graduate are not the only ones suffering from the disease of “if only.” So many of…

What are the causes of disappointment?

Like many other emotions, disappointment has its evolutionary roots. In other words, our survival and development depend on these complex emotions. Disappointments typically have three leading causes. The “arrival fallacy” is the name of the first. When we’re so intent on achieving our objectives that we skip the process, we have this particular experience of disappointment. We overcommit…

The “arrival fallacy” is the belief that once you arrive at a certain destination or achieve an objective, you’ll be happy. But arrival rarely makes you as happy as you’ve anticipated. Try instead to take pleasure in the gradual progress you make toward a goal, a source of happiness that is known, unpoetic though it may sound, as ‘pre-goal attainment positive affect.’