#angstwriting

Synopsis: Abby isn’t the pompous arrogant rich girl after all

Content: Angst, alcohol, loneliness, rumors, fluff, family problems

A/N: Comment to be in tag list. I love writing about Abby

Abby hangs up the phone and just… sits there.

Her desk light hums softly, the screen already black, the silence settling in around her like something alive. It crawls up her spine, clings to her ribs, makes it hard to breathe. She doesn’t move for a while just stares at nothing, jaw tight, leg bouncing like she’s bracing for impact.

Eventually, she gets up.

She crawls into bed, Lion immediately claiming her chest like it’s his assigned seat. She scrolls through her phone Instagram stories, party pics, people she doesn’t really care about doing things she doesn’t remember enjoying. Her thumb slows. Stops. The weight behind her eyes gets heavier.

She locks her phone and turns onto her side.

Sleep takes her fast.

Flashback

Abby’s leaning against the kitchen counter, spoon halfway to her mouth, cereal already soggy. Her mom’s voice crackles through FaceTime too calm, too polished, the way it always sounds when she’s about to say something that hurts.

“So, sweetie,” her mom says, smiling like she’s delivering good news. “We got a call from the school today.”

Abby freezes.

“They said your grades are slipping. Not failing but slipping. And you know we can’t have that.”

The word sweetie lands wrong. Her mom never uses nicknames unless she’s disappointed.

Abby sets the bowl down slowly. “I’m passing.”

“That’s not the point,” her dad cuts in, adjusting his tie. He’s in a hotel room another city, another deal. “Barely passing isn’t acceptable. Not with the opportunities you’ve been given.”

Abby straightens. “I have wrestling. Practice every day. Meets”

“And that’s part of the problem,” her mom interrupts. “You’re prioritizing hobbies over your future.”

“Hobbies?” Abby laughs sharply. “Wrestling isn’t a hobby. It’s the only thing I actually”

“If your grades don’t improve,” her dad says firmly, “you’re done. No more wrestling.”

Her chest caves in.

“What?” Abby’s voice cracks despite herself. “You can’t do that. Wrestling is everything to me.”

“Then maybe,” her mom says coolly, “you should’ve thought about that before choosing parties over responsibility.”

Abby scoffs, anger flashing hot and fast. “You don’t even know me.”

Her mom sighs, already tired. “We want what’s best for you, Abby. We’ve been lenient long enough.”

That does it.

Abby hangs up.

The screen goes dark, her reflection staring back at her like someone she doesn’t recognize. The house is too quiet. Too big.

She screams raw, frustrated and grabs her keys.

By lunch, Abby’s surrounded by the same people, the same table, the same noise. She rants, words spilling out sharp and bitter.

“They’re threatening to take wrestling away. Over grades. Like that’s fair.”

Leah snorts. “That’s insane. You’re literally fine.”

“I know,” Abby snaps. “They just wanna control everything.”

Leah glances across the cafeteria. “Why don’t you just ask Y/N for help?”

Abby pauses. “What?”

“She tutors. Like, actually tutors. She needs the money, so she’s good at it. I had her help me last semester.”

Abby follows Leah’s gaze, landing on you laughing with your friends, relaxed in a way she never feels at school.

“She’s… smart,” Leah adds casually. “I mean, she kinda has to be. That’s probably how she even got in here.”

The words are rude. Abby knows that.

She doesn’t say anything.

This school worships money. She learned that a long time ago.

“…What’s her number?” Abby asks finally.

End of flashback

Abby wakes up to her alarm screaming like an emergency. She groans, slaps it off, and notices Lion curled up on her stomach. She carefully slides out from under him, not wanting to wake him.

The mirror in the bathroom feels judgmental. She splashes water on her face, fixes her hair, makes herself look put together even though her head is already pounding with thoughts she doesn’t want.

The drive to school is quiet.

When she walks in, the performance starts.

“Abby? You’re early,” Leah says, surprised. “Guess your parents really scared you straight.”

Abby laughs, but it feels hollow. “Yeah. Something like that.”

Leah bumps her shoulder. “So you really studying now?”

“Yeah,” Abby says after a beat. “We… study together.”

Leah raises a brow. “Huh. Never thought I’d see the day.”

“You coming to the party Saturday?” Leah asks as they head toward first block.

Abby nods automatically. “Yeah. I’ll be there.”

They walk in silence for a moment. Abby spots you down the hall, laughing, head thrown back, completely unbothered. Her gaze lingers longer than she means it to.

“Abby?” Leah snaps her fingers. “You listening?”

Abby blinks. “Yeah. I heard you.”

She peels off toward class before Leah can say anything else.

Practice is brutal.

Warm-ups burn more than usual. Her muscles feel tight, her thoughts louder. Every drill feels wrong too slow, too sloppy. Her coach pairs her up to spar, and Abby goes in hard.

Too hard.

Her opponent stumbles. Abby doesn’t pull back in time.

There’s a sharp cry and the sickening sound of someone hitting the mat wrong.

“ABBY!”

Her coach’s voice cuts through the room like a blade.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” he yells. “This isn’t a street fight!”

Abby freezes, chest heaving, hands shaking. Everyone’s staring.

“Go. Sprints. Now.”

She rips off her headgear and slams it down, anger and shame mixing in her throat. She runs until her legs burn, lungs screaming, vision blurring. She doesn’t stop until she feels empty.

That night, she leaves without talking to anyone.

Music blasts in her car, windows down, hair whipping in the wind. She drives fast, like she’s trying to outrun her own thoughts.

And still she thinks of you.

How easy it feels around you. How quiet. How she doesn’t have to be on.

The house swallows her when she gets home. Every step echoes. Lion greets her like she’s been gone forever, licking her face until she laughs despite herself.

The rest of the week blurs together.

School. Practice. Silence.

By Saturday, the party is already packed when Abby arrives.

The bass rattles her ribs the second she steps inside. Music thumps through the floor, through the walls, through her skull. Bodies everywhere laughing, shouting, spilling drinks, bumping into each other without apologies. Abby slips into it easily. This part is muscle memory.

She smiles when she’s supposed to. Laughs loud. Lets people pull her into conversations she doesn’t care about. Someone presses a cup into her hand and she downs it without asking what it is.

It burns.

She takes another sip anyway.

It doesn’t help.

The noise starts to feel suffocating instead of fun. After making out with a random girl she barely remembers the name of lip gloss sticky, hands wandering, zero spark Abby pulls away under the excuse of needing air.

She pushes through the back door and steps into the backyard.

Instant relief.

It’s quiet out here, at least compared to inside. String lights hang overhead, glowing soft and warm. The grass is cool beneath her shoes. For a second, she just breathes.

Then she sees you.

You’re sitting on the steps near the edge of the yard, elbows resting on your knees, head tipped back like you’re staring at the lights or maybe the sky. Your eyes are half-closed, cheeks flushed, hair slightly messed up.

Abby slows without meaning to.

“…Huh,” she mutters.

She walks over and stops a few feet away. “Didn’t know losers came to parties.”

You crack one eye open and squint at her. “Wow. And here I was thinking you’d missed me.”

She snorts. “Delusional.”

“I don’t have the mental capacity to deal with you right now,” you say, voice lazy and slurred just enough. “I’m drunk. And my friends abandoned me.”

Abby raises an eyebrow. “Tragic.”

“Also,” you add, blinking down at your legs, “I can’t feel these.”

“That explains the sitting.”

You pat the step beside you. “Sit. You’re blocking my vibe.”

Abby hesitates for half a second then drops down next to you. Close enough that their shoulders almost touch. Almost.

The silence between you isn’t awkward. Just… heavy. Comfortable. Weirdly calm.

“You don’t look like you’re having fun,” you mumble.

She scoffs. “I’m always having fun.”

You hum, clearly unconvinced. “You look tired.”

That lands closer than she wants it to.

She leans back on her hands. “You look like you’re about to pass out.”

“Rude,” you say softly. “I’m vibing.”

“You’re slurring.”

“Am not.”

“You just said ‘vibing’ like it had six syllables.”

You laugh quiet, breathy and it does something annoying to her chest.

“I should take you home,” Abby says after a moment. “I’m sober enough.”

“Mmm,” you hum again, eyes sliding shut. “But I don’t feel like moving.”

She glances at you. “You’re kidding.”

You shake your head slowly. “Nope. Legs still offline.”

Abby exhales through a smile she doesn’t mean to have. “You’re unbelievable.”

You peek at her. “You like me.”

She scoffs instantly. “Absolutely not.”

“Then why are you still sitting here?”

She opens her mouth then closes it.

“…Shut up.”

You grin.

Abby stands and holds her hands out. “C’mon. Up.”

You look at her hands like they’re suspicious. “You’re gonna drop me.”

“I literally wrestle for a living.”

“That’s not”

Before you can finish, Abby slides one arm behind your back and the other under your knees and lifts you bridal-style. You gasp, hands flying to grab onto her hoodie.

“Oh my god,” you squeak. “You’re insane.”

She laughs really laughs. “I told you I was strong.”

You stare at her, way too close now. “Show-off.”

She carries you to the car easily, like you weigh nothing, and settles you into the passenger seat. She buckles you in without even thinking about it.

The drive is quiet in the best way. Music low. Windows down. Cool air brushing your faces.

“What’s your address, smartass?” she asks.

You give it to her, leaning your head against the window. “You’re nicer when you’re not pretending to be mean.”

She glances at you. “Don’t get used to it.”

You smile. “Too late.”

She shakes her head, but she’s smiling too.

When she pulls into your driveway, you’re more sober than before enough to look at her properly.

“Hey,” you say softly. “Thanks. For the ride.”

She lingers, fingers tapping against the steering wheel. “Yeah. No problem.”

You hesitate, then open the door. “Drive safe.”

She watches you walk inside. Waits until the door closes.

Only then does she pull away.

The smile on her face surprises her.

She doesn’t fight it.

“ Im not a violent dog ( gator ) , I don’t know why I bite ,, - monty ( NO VIRUS ) after ||killing lefty|| ruin holds on to him in tears , they’re both on the ground and he’s reassuring him that everything will be okay , they have eachother - “ if fate had chosen us to not love one another in a paradise , we can atleast die with the other by our side and see eachother in the afterlife ,,

like ,, just imagine - they both laying there in parts and service ,, motionless - holding one another , their bodies limp - if they unfortunately were star crossed lovers in life ,, maybe their stars will cross on greater paths in death . Maybe that was fate , not to be with one another but die together,,

—

tears running down their cheeks , ruin’s voice broke as his reassuring tone became more and more desperate . He felt a familiar hand cup his cheek , taking the other in for one last embrace . They took each others hand , intertwining their fingers as they felt their inevitable fate trying to drag them away - ending their forbidden love story once and for all .

Hugging one another , paths of water streaming down their cheeks . Monty taking his sun glasses off and placing them gently on ruins head - they locked eyes one last time before their eyes turning to a void like darkness . Their body’s grew limp as their efforts to fight it had faltered , the darkness reeled them in . Their bodies hit with a thud to the floor , still besides one another . “ till death do us apart ,, they say - but not even death could separate such who adored and admired one another .

Thoughts raced through their heads - their mind barely active , giving way one last push of all their best and worst memories together ,, all they had been through - willingly or not . Just to find eachother in the end in an untimely , gruesome fate .

“ we’ll meet again .. don’t know where - don’t know when .. oh i know we’ll meet again ,, some sunny day “

—

( eclipse is ruin as its partly based in ruin’s original dimension )

eclipse wandered into Monty’s room - the daycare had been under maintenance after an incident but the glamrock’s performances were still on in order to still bring money in - meaning Monty wasn’t here unfortunately .

Eclipse fidgeted by the door , his gaze had darted around Monty’s room - taking in every detail . Luckily , after what seemed like forever - Monty’s room was finally fixed . No broken sofa - or dressing table , guitar just on the floor with its strings barely hanging on . No , it was finally fixed and not damaged .

Eclipse had been doing his best recently with keeping Monty calm , anger management and such through the last couple of months .

Admittedly , it was incredibly tiresome , but that didn’t stop Eclipse from wanting to help Monty - he’d do anything and everything in his power to make Monty happy . No matter what it takes - he’d do anything for him , no matter the sacrifice . -# hint hint ,, giggls -

His gaze had drifted over to Monty’s dressing table - walking over to it , a spare pair of Monty’s glasses had caught his attention with a note besides it - ‘ figured you’d be the one thieving my glasses whenever they went missing so just take this spare , sweetheart . Now we’re matching , huh ? ~ monty ‘ , his gaze hovered over the note for a few more moments before quickly sliding it into his pocket .

He picked up the sunglasses and gently placed it on his head - well hat , more or less .

His eyes twinkled , he swayed back of fourth - his hands flapping in joy and whimsy . He glanced at himself in the mirror - he adored his new body but felt like something was missing .. and now it was finally complete - it was perfect .

He heard a laugh at the door , startled - he let out a squeak as he turned on his heel . He took a sigh of relief to see it was just his partner , Eclipse awkwardly leant back on the dressing table - not being quite sure how to act as .. not surprisingly - he acted like a embarrassed imbecile around Monty even if they were together for MONTHS .

Monty laughed , leaning off of his door frame and flashed a grin when seeing the sunglasses on his partner’s head , “ I see you found ‘em , huh ? Like ‘ em ? “ He asked as if he didn’t just see Eclipse flapping his arms the same way he did whenever he got excited .

Eclipse took a moment - seemingly had forgotten as he looked at Monty with a puzzling look for a few seconds before quickly nodding when recollecting his thoughts.

A chuckle left the gator , strolling up to Eclipse as he held his chin up to face him , planting a kiss on his forehead , “ im glad ya ‘ do - or else this would’ve been not such a good gift , right ? “ he laughed , giving his iconic toothy grin at Eclipse .

He eyerolled , looking away - if only in a matter of seconds , he heard his partner raising his voice at him , ordering for Ruin to face him .

He turned back to Monty , startled - though dread overcame him , washing away his happy thoughts as the surroundings had shifted into the place where Monty had trapped Ruin in for some time .

Thoughts racing through his head - he didn’t understand what was going on .. why had this happened ? Why were they here ?? - no .. he was just caught up in his past memories again , wanting to go back in time to prior to the virus - when everything was okay and his friends , his partner - EVERYONE was okay .

Tears pricked at his eyes - rolling down his face as he looked almost as if his heart had been torn out ,, utmost agony washing over him as he refused to believe it had all came to this ..

he could’ve saved Monty .. why didn’t he save Monty ?..

coughs uh ,, yeah man !!

—

( alternative concept ? )

Monty tore through the door of the parts n’ service chamber - hatred and anger filled his eyes .

Ruin stood there , helpless - he did all he could , trying to get through to his Monty . With every step Monty took forward - Ruin took back . His hands shaking - his body was trembling with fear but his heart throbbed with hope yet denial .

He took a breath , stopping in his footsteps .

Yes - he was afraid .. but this was still his Monty , his friend ,, his partner .. - he couldn’t walk away now , no .. not again . He couldn’t risk leaving him behind again ..

Ruin gave his best smile ,, it looked so much more tired and worn out than the one Monty remembered .

Snapping himself out of his thoughts , he threw Ruin to the wall .. finally - after all this time , Ruin would feel and face all he ‘ caused ‘ again .. his friends turning against him - his partner abandoning him ..

Monty chuckled , catching a glimpse of the sunglasses Ruin still kept after all these years .. scratched but still in good condition despite everything .

He scrapped his claws at Ruin’s torso - causing him to let out a grunt of pain ,, Monty snickered at the sight . He couldn’t wait to torture him .. torment him - laughing in victory , it echoed around the room .

Ruin fell weak - he didn’t want to fight him ,, if he had to spend his last moments anywhere .. he’d want it to be with his Monty ..

Suddenly - a beam of white had flashed everywhere for a moment . Ruin shielded his vision - just to hear a thud . He saw Monty had fallen to his knees besides him - holding his chest with one hand , the other left Ruin as he rubbed his temples .

“ m - monty ? ,, he quietly called out , though painful - he struggled yet managed to sit up ,, wincing as his chest slightly dripped oil . He glanced at Monty , seeing his lover was in pain .

“ wh .. what “ Monty barely managed to say , his voice sounded like it was using every last strength to get out words .

“ m - monty ? its - its me , Eclipse “ he sobbed , tears streaming down his cheeks as he smiled - cupping Monty’s cheeks in his hands . Monty gave an exhausted smile , his hand over Ruin’s .

“ I know , darl .. I know “ he mumbled , tears escaping him as he stared into Ruin’s eyes . “ im .. im sorry for everything “ he apologised , gazing at all the damage he did to the place and .. himself .

Ruin hushed him , shaking his head.. “ you were always a violent creature .. but I never blamed you for that ,, he smiled - wincing as he pressed his forehead against his lovers . They embraced one another , holding onto eachother as if their lives depended on it .

Together once again they were ,, starcrossed lovers finally challenged fate to see heavens gates open for them

( dude idk .. I lost the concept !!.. )

🖤 Soundproof Shadows 🖤 Genre: Angst | Dark | Psychological Thriller | Reader-insert (f!reader)

Summary: In the glow of a fading party, Y/N feels the weight of Viraj Dobriyal’s gaze before the night twists into something darker. Dragged into a soundproof room, bound in leather straps, she is forced to face an impossible choice—betray him, or surrender. But either way, Viraj has already decided: freedom is nothing but an illusion.

The long game

Synopsis: Abby takes you to the hospital luckily your ok to go home but Abby takes you back to hers instead

Content: fluff, hospital, y/n use, half proof read, angst, dual pov

A/n: I did first person for Abby’s pov hope yall enjoy

ITags: @slutformangos @kamogrrl @hornyscissorsister @cupidletterss @mybodyismadeofcrushedstars @sillyme12356 @roseisadyke @megansstrap @mel6ncholixc @astenth @chrimson-ghost @infinitevortexfleet

You don’t remember much from last night, your brain’s foggy but even then you remember Abby’s touch, voice protectiveness.

When suddenly you wake up in the hospital lights are to bright.

Everything smells sterile. Clean. Wrong

Abby doesn’t leave your side once.

Not when the nurses take your vitals.

Not when they ask questions she doesn’t fully have answers to.

Not when they say words like “monitoring” and “dehydrated” and “you did the right thing bringing her in.”

It’s weird that she’s staying by your side after everything that happened I mean yall aren’t even close so why was she doing all of this.

She stands there with her arms crossed like she’s holding herself together by force.

When you finally wake up fully, your head feels like it’s stuffed with cotton.

Your mouth is dry your brain can’t even comprehend words to leave your mouth

Abby is sitting in the chair next to the bed, elbows on her knees, staring at the floor.

Her hair is messy. Her hoodie is gone. She looks… wrecked.

You shifted in the hospital bed uncomfortable as fuck

Her head snaps up so fast it’s almost violent.

For half a second she just stares at you.

Then she exhales.

“You’re awake….thank god, you look like shit tho.”

her voice cracks at the end.

The nurse comes in not long after. Explains gently that you were given fluids, that you’re stable and that you’ll be discharged tonight. You’re told to rest. To not be alone.

Abby doesn’t even hesitate.

“I’ll take her.”

You glance at her.

She doesn’t look back.

The drive to her house is quiet. Heavy quiet All of the questions stuck in your throat.

Streetlights pass over her face in slow flashes. You notice the tension still sitting in her jaw. Finally you’re able to muster some words out.

“You didn’t have to stay,” you say softly, throat dry.

She laughs once. Dry. Humorless.

“Yeah. I did.”

You don’t argue.

When she pulls into her driveway, you hesitate.

“Abby-”

“You’re not going home alone tonight, your parents can’t see you like this.” she says, already getting out of the car. “Don’t fight me on this.”

You’re too tired to.

Her house is darker than you expected. Calm. Quiet. Nothing like the chaos from earlier.

She kicks off her shoes and gestures toward the couch. “Sit.”

You do.

She disappears down the hallway and comes back with sweatpants and a hoodie.

“They’ll be big,” she says. “Deal with it.”

You almost smile, even while she’s taking care of of you she’s still upset

She turns away while you change, giving you privacy without making it awkward.

When you settle back onto the couch, she hands you a glass of water and sits across from you, elbows on her knees again.

For a minute, neither of you speak.

Then

“You scared me.”

It’s quiet. Honest. No attitude.

You look up.

She’s not looking at you. She’s staring at her hands.

“I walked into that room and you weren’t responding right,” she continues. “I thought…” She stops. Swallows. Tries again. “I thought I was too late.”

Your chest tightens.

“I’m sorry.”

Her head lifts immediately.

“No.” Her voice is firm now. Protective. “Don’t apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Silence again.

Then softer

“I should’ve tried harder that night in the car.”

You blink.

“You were right,” she admits. “I don’t get what it’s like for you. I thought I did. I don’t.”

The air shifts.

You’re seeing the true Abby.

“I don’t see you as a phase,” she says quietly. “I never did.”

Your breath catches.

She finally looks at you fully.

And suddenly, the fight from weeks ago doesn’t feel the same.

She stands and grabs a blanket, draping it over you. Her hand lingers at your shoulder for just a second too long.

“You’re taking my bed,” she says.

“What? No.”

“Y/N.”

You don’t argue.

When you’re tucked in, she turns off the main light, leaving only the lamp glowing soft gold.

She starts to walk out.

“Abby?”

She stops in the doorway.

“Stay?”

It’s barely above a whisper.

She doesn’t even hesitate this time.

She crosses the room, sits on the edge of the bed first like she’s testing the space then carefully lies down on top of the blanket, leaving space between you.

Not touching.

But close enough that you can feel the warmth.

After a minute, your hand drifts across the sheets.

She sees it.

Her fingers intertwine with yours.

Light. Steady.

“I’ve got you,” she murmurs into the dark.

And this time, it doesn’t feel like a promise made out of panic.

It feels permanent.

The sun is fighting you

Like personally offended that you’re trying to sleep.

You groan and turn your face into the pillow

Only for something warm and wet to drag across your cheek.

You jolt.

“Ew-what the…”

A slobbery tongue swipes across your nose.

You squint your eyes open.

Lion is standing over you like he pays rent here, tail wagging, absolutely thrilled that you’re alive.

“At least I know lion likes me at first meeting.”

He licks you again.

You try to sit up too fast.

Bad idea.

Your head throbs instantly.

“Okay. Noted. We move slower today.”

From somewhere down the hall you hear a pan clink. The low hum of a stove. The smell hits you then eggs, toast, something sweet.

Footsteps.

Abby appears in the doorway.

She’s wearing gray sweats and a black tank, hair pulled back, a little messy. There’s a dish towel thrown over her shoulder like she’s been doing this her whole life.

She stops when she sees you upright.

Relief flashes across her face before she smooths it out.

“Morning,” she says carefully. “How’s your head?”

“Like someone hosted a marching band in it.”

She huffs a small laugh. “Yeah. That tracks.”

Lion finally hops off the bed and trots toward her like he just completed his morning mission.

She scratches behind his ears automatically.

“You’re supposed to be resting,” she says, looking back at you.

“I am resting.”

“You’re sitting.”

“Semantics.”

She crosses the room and hands you a glass of water and two pills.

“Doctor said these would help.”

You hesitate for half a second.

nausea washing over you, your brain conflicted on if you can trust her.

Her expression softens.

“It’s just pain relief,” she says gently. “Promise.”

After a beat.

You take them.

The silence after isn’t awkward.

It’s… new.

You notice things now. The way her room looks lived in but not messy. The guitar leaning against the wall. The framed photo on her dresser turned slightly away like she doesn’t want people asking about it.

“You cook?” you ask.

She shrugs. “I can survive.”

“That smells more advanced than survival.”

She fights a smile.

There’s a pause.

Then she sits on the edge of the bed.

Closer than last night.

“You feeling dizzy?” she asks quietly.

“Not really. Just tired.”

She nods, studying your face like she’s memorizing it.

“You really scared me,” she says again. Softer than last night.

You look down at your hands. “I didn’t mean to.”

“I know.”

Another beat.

“Dina texted me,” she adds. “Like thirty times.”

You groan. “She’s never letting me live this down.”

“She was freaking out,” Abby says. “Ellie too.”

You swallow.

“I didn’t even know you’d be there.”

Her jaw tightens slightly.

“I wasn’t supposed to be.”

That makes you look up.

She exhales slowly. “Because I couldn’t sit at home thinking about what you said in the car, I needed a distraction.”

Oh.

The air shifts again.

Lion jumps back on the bed, settling between you like he’s buffering the tension.

“You still think I see you as a phase?” Abby asks quietly.

You don’t answer right away.

“I think,” you say carefully, “that I don’t know how to matter to someone like you without losing myself.”

She leans back slightly, processing.

“You matter,” she says finally. Not defensive. Not rushed. Just certain.

The sun catches the gold in her hair.

“You mattered before we even started fighting,” she adds.

Your chest feels tight in a completely different way now.

Not fear.

Something warmer.

“You made breakfast,” you say softly, almost like you’re trying to deflect how intense that just got.

She rolls her eyes lightly. “Yeah. Don’t make it weird.”

“It’s pancakes, isn’t it?”

“…maybe.”

You smile for real this time.

She notices.

And for the first time since the car argument, she smiles back without restraint.

“Come on,” she says, standing and offering her hand. “Eat before Lion steals it.”

You look at her hand.

Then at her.

You take it.

She doesn’t let go right away.

The kitchen is warm.

Not just temperature wise. It feels lived in. Quiet. Safe.

Sunlight spills across the counter in golden strips, catching the steam rising from a stack of pancakes on a plate way too neat to be accidental.

“You’re staring,” Abby says, flipping another pancake like she didn’t just hear her own heartbeat in the silence.

“I’m evaluating.”

“Of?”

“Whether this is a manipulation tactic.”

She snorts. “Yeah. I drug you with kindness.”

You freeze for half a second.

Her face drops instantly.

“Sorry,” she says quickly. “Bad wording.”

“It’s okay,” you murmur. “I know what you meant.”

There’s a beat of quiet understanding. Careful. Gentle.

She plates the last pancake and slides the stack toward you. “Eat.”

You sit at the small kitchen table while she grabs forks and syrup. Lion settles at Abby’s feet like a loyal guard.

You take the first bite.

And pause.

“Okay,” you say slowly. “Why is this actually good?”

Abby tries to hide the pride in her face and fails. “Because I can cook.”

“You made these from scratch?”

“Don’t insult me.”

You take another bite, slower this time.

She watches you.

Not in a weird way. Just… attentive.

“You don’t have to hover,” you say without looking up.

“I’m not hovering.”

“You’re literally leaning forward.”

She leans back immediately. “Better?”

You smile faintly. “Worse. Now you look offended.”

She relaxes a little at that.

For a minute, it’s just forks scraping plates and the soft hum of the fridge.

Then

“I meant what I said last night.”

You glance up.

She’s staring at her hands again.

Her jaw tightens slightly.

“I hang out with you because I like you.”

It’s not dramatic.

It’s not loud.

It’s simple.

And somehow that makes it hit harder.

Your stomach flips.

“You’re bad at timing,” you say softly.

She huffs a breath. “Yeah. I’ve gathered.”

You twirl your fork between your fingers.

“I don’t want to be something you try on and then outgrow,” you admit. “I don’t survive that kind of thing well.”

Abby’s eyes lift immediately.

“I don’t outgrow people,” she says. “I shut down when I’m scared.”

That one’s new.

You tilt your head slightly. “Scared of what?”

Her lips press into a thin line. She debates it.

“Of caring more than the other person.”

You set your fork down.

“I wouldn’t have said all that in the car,” you say quietly, “if I didn’t care.”

Her shoulders drop just a little.

Lion shifts, bumping Abby’s leg.

You glance down at him.

“He’s definitely judging us,” you mutter.

“He hates emotional conversations,” Abby replies. “Very anti-communication.”

You both laugh. Soft. Real.

The tension eases, but it doesn’t disappear. It transforms.

You reach for the syrup at the same time she does.

You both freeze.

She doesn’t pull away immediately.

Neither do you.

“Your hands are cold,” she murmurs.

“You made me get up.”

She almost smiles. Almost.

Then she gently wraps her fingers around yours.

“You’re staying today,” she says quietly. Not a question.

You look at her.

“You gonna keep feeding me?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

You squeeze her hand once before letting go.

“Okay,” you say.

You finished eating and offered to help Abby with the dishes, but she kept insisting you needed to rest. So now you’re sitting in one of the kitchen chairs, watching her from across the room.

Her back is turned to you.

Her shoulders are broad, arms flexing slightly as she washes the plates. The veins in her forearms are faintly visible, and you don’t even realize how long you’ve been staring until your thoughts start spiraling.

Is it even okay for you to be looking at her like this?

Are you just friends?

Or are you something more?

You slump down in the chair, with a quiet sigh.

“Are you okay?” Abby asks without turning around. “Do you want to go back to bed?”

“Oh! I’m fine,” you reply quickly. “Just thinking.”

She shuts off the water and glances over her shoulder.

“About what?”

She shifts, leaning back against the sink with her arms crossed. The position makes her look even better, and that does absolutely nothing to help your focus.

You swallow.

“Are we… friends now?” you ask shyly.

Abby lets out a soft laugh. “Yeah. We are.”

For some reason, that’s not the answer you wanted.

You pout slightly before you can stop yourself.

And you’re not even sure why it feels disappointing.

ABBY POV

I shouldn’t have laughed.

The second she asked, “Are we friends now?” I knew that question meant more than it sounded like.

But I panicked.

So I said the safest thing.

“Yeah. We are.”

She pouted.

Fuck.

I notice everything about her.

The way she stares when she thinks I’m not looking.

The way she overthinks every sentence before she says it.

The way her voice gets smaller when she’s scared to want something.

I don’t know when my feelings towards her change I met her four months ago and now she’s all that I think about.

But I don’t think she wants me.

I think she wants the closeness. The attention. The feeling of being chosen after everything that happened.

God that sounds shitty of me to say

Plus there’s no way she’s gay

So I decide right there in the kitchen, with soap still on my hands that I’m not going to push it.

If she wants friends, I can be friends.

Even if it feels like swallowing glass.

I turn back to the sink so she doesn’t see my face.

“Do you need anything?” I ask casually. Too casually.

“No,” she says quietly.

I dry my hands and grab a towel, walking past her chair.

Too close.

I don’t mean to brush my fingers against her shoulder, but I do.

She stills.

I keep walking like I didn’t notice.

Friends.

Right.

I grab her phone off the counter and toss it gently onto the table in front of her.

“You should text Dina. Let her know you’re alive.”

She rolls her eyes a little. “Bossy.”

I smirk. “You’re in my house.”

Couple behavior.

Stop it.

I move to the fridge, grab a bottle of water, and set it in front of her without asking.

She looks up at me like she’s about to say something.

I don’t let her.

“You’re still pale,” I mutter. “Drink it.”

She smiles softly.

It does something dangerous to my chest.

I lean against the counter again, arms crossed, pretending this is easy.

Pretending I didn’t stay up half the night making sure she was breathing evenly.

Pretending I didn’t almost say something in the hospital that I couldn’t take back.

She keeps looking at me.

And I don’t know how to stop myself from looking back.

Her eyes drop to my arms for half a second.

I notice.

Of course I do.

But I tell myself it doesn’t mean anything.

“Rest today,” I say, voice back to neutral. “We’re just taking it easy.”

We.

I say it like it’s automatic.

Like she belongs here.

belongs with me.

I turn away before she can read my face.

Because if she ever figured out how much I want more than that.

And she didn’t feel the same.

I don’t think I’d recover.

So I’ll keep it simple.

I’ll keep my hands to myself.

I’ll ignore the way she looks at me.

And I’ll be whatever she needs me to be.

Even if it’s just a friend.

Soon we’re back in my room

I tell her we’re watching something “low effort.”

Translation: I need background noise so I don’t overthink the fact that she’s in my room.

Again.

She sits on my bed like she belongs there. Tucks her legs under herself. Adjusts the pillow behind her back.

I stay on top of the blanket.

Space.

That’s important.

Lion jumps up immediately and curls near her feet like he’s chosen sides.

Traitor.

I grab the remote and put on the first random movie I see. I don’t even register what it is. Something with explosions. Something loud enough to fill the silence.

She shifts closer to see the screen better.

Our shoulders brush.

It is the smallest contact.

It feels catastrophic.

I pretend I didn’t notice.

My arm is resting behind her, technically on the mattress.

Not around her.

Just… there.

She smells like my hoodie.

That’s not helping.

The movie starts, dialogue spilling into the room, but I don’t process a single word.

All I’m aware of is how warm she is.

How close.

How every time she laughs at something on screen, her knee nudges mine.

She doesn’t move it away.

I do.

Barely.

She notices.

“Am I crowding you?” she asks softly.

No.

You’re undoing me.

I shrug. “You’re fine.”

She relaxes again, leaning back into the pillow.

Five minutes later, she yawns.

My brain short-circuits.

She tilts her head slightly and it rests against my shoulder.

Not fully.

Just enough.

I freeze.

Every muscle in my body goes still.

If I move, she’ll pull away.

If I don’t move, I might actually combust.

Her hair brushes my neck.

Her breathing slows.

She’s not asleep. I can tell.

She’s just… comfortable.

With me.

And that’s the part that messes me up.

Because if she were into me like actually into me wouldn’t this feel different?

Wouldn’t she be nervous too?

She seems calm.

I feel like I’m holding back a tidal wave.

My arm, the one behind her, starts to ache.

I could move it.

I don’t.

Instead, without thinking, my fingers curl slightly.

They hover near her shoulder.

Don’t touch.

Don’t touch.

I touch.

Lightly.

Just the tips of my fingers

Her breathing starts to even out.

Slow. Steady.

I glance down carefully.

Her eyes are closed.

A small crease between her brows like she’s still fighting whatever dream she fell into.

The movie keeps playing, light flickering across the room. I should move. I should turn it off. I should create distance.

Instead, I let my head rest gently against hers.

Just for a second.

Just to see what it feels like.

It feels… right.

Too right.

Her warmth seeps into me.

Her breathing steadies mine.

The tension I’ve been holding all morning slowly drains out of my shoulders.

I don’t even realize my eyes are closing.

The last thing I register is the weight of her against me.

Trusting.

Safe.

And for once, I let myself believe maybe this isn’t one-sided.

Then I fall asleep too.

between us 3

Popular (reader) x semi popular (ellie William)

Previous chapter

6,870 words

Synopsis: she comes over everything was nice at first but your thoughts crept in Ellie tried to help but it didn’t work you ended up going through weeks of self hate but then something broke in you and now you’re at Ellie’s house

Content: homophobia, mental issues, fluff, internalized homophobia, arguing, angst, friends to lovers, a lot of gay stuff, modern au, nicknames, sad, dual pov, trash parents.

A/N: (THIS IS DISCONTINUED) I’m so tired I worked hard to feed my babies hope yall en joyed I may have messed up on some parts don’t mind it.

Taglist: @kamogrrl @liasxeatt @theeprettiestlittleliar @ellz47 @vahnilla

Soon you wake up from your beautiful nap

The rest of the house was quite except for the rain hitting the glass window and the humming of the heater and your parents usual muffled conversation. Good thing your cramps calmed down enough you were able to sit up

Your phone was face down beside you, the last unread text from Ellie glowing faintly underneath. You’d read it a dozen times already.

Ellie: You sure you’re okay? I could stop by after work.

You never replied. Because the thought of her actually showing up made your chest ache. You didn’t know what would hurt more seeing her, or pretending you didn’t want to.

Then came a tap

Soft a first. Then again

You froze your stomach turning your body felt who it was before you even saw her. The night outside was dark, rain misting against the glass and there she was. Ellie. Hood up, cheeks pink from the cold, a little grin pulling at her lips as she held up a plastic bag like it was a peace offering.

She mouthed, open up.

You drew your curtains back a little confused by the bag “if it’s food then you’re able to come inside.” You mouthed back Ellie rolled her eyes showing you that it had food in it

You rolled your eyes, but your heart was racing. You lifted the window, letting a cold breeze rush in as Ellie climbed inside like she’d done it a hundred times before. She landed softly, brushing rain off her jacket.

“Hey,” she said, voice low. “Miss me?”

You crossed your arms, trying to sound annoyed and not completely flustered. “You can’t just sneak into people’s rooms.”

“Technically,” she said, setting the bag on your desk, “I knocked.”

You blinked at the bag. “So what goodies did you bring me.”

“A Care package.” She started unpacking it a heating pad, chocolate, Advil, and a small container of soup. “My grandma’s recipe. Works miracles. Figured you weren’t exactly having the best day.”

You hated how badly you wanted to kiss her from just doing a nice gesture “thanks.” You mumbled

Ellie just smiled and sat on the floor, leaning her back against the wall like she belonged there. “You really weren’t gonna answer my texts, huh?”

You hesitated. “Didn’t know what to say.”

“That you were dying of cramps?” she teased.

You smirked, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “Didn’t wanna bother you.”

Ellie looked up at you then really looked. “You never bother me.”

You stared back words not being able to form the air in the room felt heavy thick but soft at the same time.

“Ellie-” you scrambled for tissues, but she was already laughing, holding a hand under her nose.

“Guess your window’s cursed,” she said, voice muffled. “Every time I’m near it, my nose decides to explode.”

You couldn’t help but laugh an actual laugh as you handed her tissues. “You’re such an idiot.”

“I prefer ‘heroic visitor bearing soup,’ but okay.”

The moment stretched between you. She wiped her nose, smirking, but her eyes were softer now. “You look better when you laugh.”

That one sentence made your stomach twist in ways that had nothing to do with cramps.

You turned away, suddenly too aware of the space between you and how badly you wanted to close it. “Don’t say stuff like that.”

“Why not?”

“Because.” You swallowed. “You know why.”

Ellie didn’t move, didn’t flinch. “No, I don’t. Maybe you should tell me.”

You shook your head, pacing to your desk. “You don’t get it, Ellie. My mom already thinks people like you are… wrong.”

Ellie’s voice went quieter. “People like me?”

You bit your lip, hating yourself even as you said it. “You know what I mean.”

“Do I?” she said, standing now. “Because last time I checked, you’re not exactly straight either.”

That hit you like a punch. “WHAT!-”

“It’s okay,” she said quickly. “I’m not mad. I just-” she rubbed her arm, searching for words. “You keep acting like this thing between us is some big mistake, but it’s not. It’s real.”

You wanted to scream that she was wrong, that she didn’t understand, that you couldn’t be what she thought you were. But all that came out was a whisper.

“My mom would be disgusted by me she may even disown me.”

Ellie stepped closer, slow, cautious. “Then she doesn’t deserve to know this part of you. she doesn’t love you unconditionally.”

Her voice was soft now, almost breaking. “you don’t have to hate yourself just because she taught you to. Nothing is wrong with you.”

That was it the dam broke. You sank onto the edge of your bed, crying quietly into your hands. Ellie didn’t say anything, just knelt beside you, one hand resting lightly on your arm.

For a while, all you could hear was the rain against the window and the sound of your own heartbeat.

Finally, you looked up, voice trembling. “Why are you being so nice to me?”

Ellie smiled tired, gentle. “Because I’ve been where you are.”

You blinked, tears still slipping down your cheeks. “And what happened?”

“I found someone who told me it was okay to stop hiding.”

You didn’t say anything after that. You just leaned into her, and she wrapped her arms around you, warm and solid. For a moment, the world outside your window didn’t exist just rain, and breathing, and the quiet relief of being held.

When she finally pulled away, she grinned softly. “You should probably get some sleep. Soup’s on your desk.”

You nodded, eyes red. “Thanks… for everything.”

Ellie climbed back out the window. You didn’t want her to leave she took the warmth and your joy with her only leaving pain behind

You sat there staring at the window long after she was gone, one hand over your heart, whispering to yourself half prayer, half promise:

“I wish I could believe that.”

Ellie woke up to the smell of burnt coffee and the sound of Joel coughing in the other room.

She groaned, rolling onto her side and smacking the alarm on her nightstand until it shut up. Her phone buzzed beside her another message from her boss reminding her about the afternoon shift at the library café. She ignored it for a second, eyes still half closed, brain still halfway stuck on last night.

She laid there for a second, staring at the ceiling, trying to replay every second of that night your eyes when you cried, the way you leaned into her like you were scared you’d fall apart if she didn’t. Ellie hadn’t meant to make her cry, but she wasn’t gonna lie seeing her let it out felt… real. Like you finally stopped pretending for five fucking minutes.

Then Ellie’s alarm went off again at 6:30, and Ellie groaned into her pillow, hitting the snooze button like it was her worst enemy. Her room still smelled faintly like the rain from last night soaked hoodie draped over her chair, guitar propped against the wall, open sketchbook full of half-finished doodles and lyrics.

She dragged herself out of bed, hair a mess, and padded into the kitchen. Joel was already there, coughing into a napkin, trying to pretend it didn’t hurt.

“You should’ve stayed in bed, old man,” she muttered, opening the fridge.

Joel grunted. “Can’t stay in bed when you’re the one payin’ bills now.”

Ellie rolled her eyes but smiled anyway. “I’m just workin’ part-time.”

He smirked, but his voice came out rough. “Still. Proud of you, kiddo.”

And that hit her in the chest. Because it didn’t matter how old she got hearing Joel say that still made her feel like she was doing something right.

She poured him some orange juice, sliding it across the table. “You gonna take it easy today?”

He shrugged. “Got a doctor’s appointment later. Don’t worry about me.”

“I can drive you being late to school never bothers me.” Ellie said a little more firm

Joel sighs “it’s fine I should be able to drive myself like I said don’t worry about me.”

Ellie sighed giving up “yeah, fine.”

Soon you were at school which wasn’t quiet it never was.

People always had something to say when it came to Ellie Williams. She didn’t even try to be popular; it just happened. The easy smile, the guitar at lunch, the way she could joke with anyone and make it feel natural. Everyone wanted a piece of her, but no one really knew her.

Not like you did.

She could still feel the weight of your head on her shoulder from last night, the tremble in your voice when you said your mom would hate you. The way you tried so hard to hide the softness in your eyes like you were scared it would give you away.

She thought about that a lot, actually.

About you.

You weren’t like everyone else. You didn’t just look at her you saw her.

And that scared the hell out of her.

“Yo, Ellie!” one of her friends Marcus, loud and always too hyped called across the courtyard. “Heard you’re doing another open mic this Friday. That true?”

Ellie shrugged, slinging her backpack higher. “Maybe. Depends.”

“Depends on what?”

“Whether I feel like being the entertainment for you clowns again.”

He laughed, clapping her on the shoulder. “You love it, don’t lie.”

Yeah, she did.

The music. The crowd. The way everyone cheered when she played something new. It was the only time she didn’t feel like she was holding her breath.

during lunch, when everyone gathered around her table, laughing and talking, Ellie smiled like she always did but her heart wasn’t in it.

Because all she could think about was how bad she wanted to text you again.

Just a simple hey.

Or maybe you eat yet?

Something that wouldn’t sound like I miss you but still kind of meant it.

She didn’t, though.

She just stared at her phone, thumb hovering over your name, before locking the screen and shoving it back in her pocket.

“Ellie, you good?” Marcus asked, raising a brow.

“Yeah,” she said automatically, forcing a smirk. “Just thinking.”

He grinned. “About that girl from chem who keeps staring at you?”

Ellie snorted. “Nah. She’s not my type.”

He leaned forward. “Then what is your type?”

Her smirk faded a little. “Complicated.”

By the time the final bell rang, Ellie was exhausted not from the classes, but from pretending she was fine. She stopped by her locker, tossing books inside and pulling out her guitar case.

Her phone buzzed.

One new message.

It wasn’t you.

It was Joel.

Joel: Doctor says it’s just a bad infection. I’ll be home late, kiddo. Don’t worry.

She smiled softly. Don’t worry. He always said that, even when things were bad.

Which kinda reminded her of you and how you always said you were fine ok even when you weren’t Ellie chuckled to herself “always clinging to the sick.” She whispered under her breath

She slung her guitar over her shoulder and started walking toward the parking lot. The air smelled like rain again, and her fingers itched for her phone.

Maybe you were home. Maybe you were still in bed. Maybe you were thinking about her too.

But Ellie didn’t text you. Not yet.

Because she knew you were fighting something bigger than her something that didn’t just disappear after one night. And as much as it hurt, she’d wait.

Wait for you to stop flinching when she said your name.

Wait for you to believe that loving her wasn’t wrong.

Wait for you to finally look at her without guilt shadowing your eyes.

Until then, she’d just keep showing up.

At your window.

In your thoughts.

In songs you’d never admit were about her.

Because if there was one thing Ellie Williams knew how to do it was hold on to people she cared about, even when they tried to run.

You stopped checking your phone.

Not because you didn’t want to you did. Every hour, your brain screamed at you to look, to see if Ellie had texted, to find some proof that last night hadn’t just been a fever dream. But you couldn’t. You were scared that if you saw her name, everything inside you would cave again.

So you ignored it. You ignored her.

You ignored everything.

School became background noise. Teachers talked, friends waved, Dina tried to corner you in the hallway once, but you slipped away before she could say a word. You didn’t want to hear apologies. You didn’t want to talk about Jesse. You didn’t want to talk about Ellie.

You just wanted to disappear.

your mom’s voice echoing in your head:

It’s not normal. It’s not normal. It’s not normal.

It was like poison.

You could still hear her tone, sharp and disappointed, the same way she sounded when you got a bad grade or forgot to smile at church.

But this time, it wasn’t something you could fix.

You couldn’t just study harder to stop loving a girl. Although you wished you could it would make a lot of things easier.

At home, things got worse.

Your parents had stopped pretending. The arguments weren’t whispers behind closed doors anymore they were full-blown storms that shook the walls. You’d wake up to shouting downstairs, or plates slamming into counters.

Your dad was gone most nights, saying he was “staying with a friend.” Your mom started pacing more, drinking more coffee, snapping at small things.

The house didn’t feel like home anymore.

It felt like a waiting room before something exploded.

And you were the ghost floating between them.

Too quiet to be noticed, too tired to care.

Alex noticed, though. He always did.

He’d knock on your door sometimes, asking if you wanted to play cards or watch something. You’d smile, tell him you were busy, and watch his little face fall every single time.

You hated yourself for it.

But you couldn’t do anything else.

You couldn’t be a big sister when you were barely holding yourself together.

Although you missed the time you and Alex use to spend together laughing playing now it feels like both of y’all are to tired to even try and communicate

It got bad one night.

You were in your room, staring at the wall, feeling that strange tightness in your chest that made it hard to breathe. It wasn’t crying would’ve helped. This was worse. This was being so full of emotion that you felt empty.

You hadn’t eaten much that day. Barely slept. The mirror scared your pale skin, tired eyes, fake smile. You looked like someone you didn’t know.

And through it all, one thought kept eating at you:

You ruined everything.

You ruined your relationship.

You ruined your friendship.

You ruined your family.

And worst of all you were ruining yourself for something you weren’t even allowed to want.

When your phone buzzed again that night, you stared at it for a long time.

One text. Ellie.

Ellie: Hey. Just checking in again. You’ve been quiet. I’ll stop bothering you if you want, just… make sure you’re okay, alright?

You couldn’t breathe for a second.

You wanted to reply.

You wanted to tell her you missed her, that you weren’t okay, that every time you closed your eyes you saw her face and it made you feel both safe and terrified.

But your fingers just hovered over the keyboard, shaking.

You typed:

I’m fine. Just tired.

Then deleted it.

Then put your phone face-down again, like it was burning you.

Because she made you feel something real. And real things hurt.

And yet, every night, you’d still look at your window half-expecting to see her there again, hoodie on, grin soft, holding another dumb bag of soup.

But she never came.

Not because she didn’t care.

Because maybe she finally believed you didn’t want her to.

You told yourself that was good. That it was safer this way.

But when you closed your eyes, the silence was unbearable.

You picked up your phone not even fully thinking.

Ellie laid in bed doom scrolling so she doesn’t think of you only to see a message slide down

You: Can you give me your address I need to be anywhere other than here

Ellie: Sure, wait is everything ok

Ellie typed her address out not knowing if this was the best option especially if your mom found out you were at her place

A couple of minutes past you hear a car coming good thing Joel was still at the hospital so he couldn’t question why a girl was coming over this late

A soft knock at the door caught Ellie attention she opened the door slightly resting on the doorframe

And there you were.

Standing in the cold.

Hair messy. Hoodie zipped up wrong. Eyes red not from crying, but from being tired. The kind of tired that came from fighting your own brain too long.

Ellie didn’t even hesitate inviting you in leading you by your arm to her bedroom once y’all were both inside she closed the door she whispered. “What are you doing here?”

You didn’t answer right away. You just stood there, breathing like you’d been running, your arms wrapped around yourself.

“I-I didn’t know where else to go,” you said finally, voice cracking halfway through.

Ellie’s stomach dropped. “Did something happen? Are you okay?”

You shook your head, and it wasn’t really a no more like a please don’t make me explain.

“…..what do you want to eat..and make sure your location is off.” Ellie can see you realize that you in fact didn’t turn off your location “I don’t mind I could eat anything right now.”

Ellie starred at you for a second not sure if you were just saying that “ok well my choice then”

A couple minutes past and Ellie was back with two bowls of ramen she saw you laying on her bed kinda awkwardly “here’s your food princess.” Ellie sat next to you, leaving a small gap between you two. Her room smelled faintly like coffee and lemon detergent the same as it always did.

You smiled faintly, eyes dropping to the food. The silence stretched again, and Ellie could feel the weight hanging in the air between you everything unsaid, everything avoided.

Later y’all finished eating setting the bowl on Ellie’s desk. Finally, you whispered, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Ellie looked at you sharply. “Hey, don’t say that.”

“I’m serious,” you said, voice trembling. “I keep trying to be normal, but I can’t stop thinking about you. And it’s-it’s so stupid. Because I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t want you.”

Her throat closed.

You kept going, words spilling faster now like if you didn’t let them out, they’d choke you.

“My mom keeps saying things about people

like us. And I keep thinking she’s right. I don’t even know who I am anymore, Ellie. I just… I hate it. I hate this part of me.”

Ellie’s chest ached. She wanted to punch something. Hug you. Scream. All of it.

She reached out, finally slow, careful and took your hand. You didn’t pull away.

“Listen,” she said quietly, “you don’t have to figure everything out right now, okay?”

Your eyes lifted to hers glassy, vulnerable, searching.

Ellie squeezed your hand gently. “You’re not broken. You’re just scared. And it’s okay to be scared.”

You blinked hard, and a tear slipped down your cheek. You tried to wipe it away fast, embarrassed, but Ellie caught your wrist before you could.

“Hey,” she whispered. “You don’t have to hide it.”

For the first time all night, you leaned into her. Slowly. Hesitant. Like a deer testing its steps.

Ellie wrapped her arm around you, pulling you against her chest.

And there it was again that quiet peace that only existed when you were near.

Neither of you said anything for a long time. The house stayed silent. Your breathing evened out.

Ellie didn’t know what this was, or what it would become, but she knew one thing for sure she wasn’t gonna let you walk home alone tonight.

You were safe here. Even if just for a few hours.

She glanced down at you already half-asleep against her shoulder, your hoodie sleeves bunched up to your chin and whispered softly, like a secret just for the dark:

“You’ll be okay. I promise.”

You fell asleep pressed against her chest, your breathing soft and uneven at first, then slowing until it matched hers. Ellie hadn’t even meant to fall asleep too she was just gonna make sure you were okay, that you didn’t wake up in the middle of another panic spiral but somewhere between watching the rise and fall of your shoulders and counting the freckles on your cheek, her eyes finally gave in.

And now it was morning.

The light crept in slow, warm, golden the kind that made everything look softer than it really was. It spilled across her floor, climbed the wall, and finally stretched across her bed until it touched your face.

You scrunched your nose, muttering something incoherent, then shifted closer your hand sliding instinctively around her hoodie like you were afraid she’d disappear if you let go.

Ellie froze for a second. Not because she didn’t like it, but because she did. Too much.

Your head fit perfectly in the space between her neck and shoulder. Your hair tickled her collarbone. She could feel your heartbeat steady, calm against her ribs.

“Damn,” she whispered under her breath, voice low so she wouldn’t wake you.

She should’ve moved. Should’ve gotten up, opened the curtains wider, anything to keep herself from staring. But she didn’t. Instead, she rested her chin lightly on top of your head and just… stayed there.

The world outside was already awake birds, cars, someone mowing their lawn too early but in here, it was quiet. The kind of quiet that felt safe.

Then you shifted again, slowly waking up. Your eyelashes fluttered open, and for a second, you just looked at her sleepy, confused, then realizing where you were.

“Oh my God,” you murmured, instantly sitting up a bit, face turning red.

Ellie laughed softly. “Relax. You didn’t, like, drool on me or anything.”

You glared half-heartedly, pulling your sleeves over your hands. “Still embarrassing.”

“Nah.” Ellie stretched, rubbing her eyes. “Could’ve been worse. You could’ve kicked me in your sleep.”

You rolled your eyes but smiled that tiny, tired smile that made Ellie’s chest ache in the best way.

The sun caught your skin just right, lighting up your face, your hair everything. You looked like something she wasn’t supposed to touch.

“Stop staring,” you said, voice barely above a whisper.

Ellie smirked. “You wish I would.”

You tried to look away, but your face stayed pink, and Ellie swore she could hear your heartbeat in the quiet.

“Hey,” she said softly, serious now. “You good?”

You hesitated. Then nodded. “Yeah… I think so.”

And for the first time in weeks, you actually meant it.

The morning light hit the both of you then soft and golden and kind and Ellie thought maybe, just maybe, things didn’t have to stay as dark as they’d been.

She leaned back on the pillow, smiling faintly. “Told you you’d be okay.”

You looked at her really looked and whispered, “Yeah… maybe I will be.”

The moment hung there, warm and quiet. Two kids, one messy morning, and the sun spilling in like it was rooting for them.

It was quiet again the kind of quiet that felt too soft, too unreal. Morning light still spilled through Ellie’s window, turning the dust in the air into gold. You could hear her breathing next to you, slow, steady. Like she wasn’t afraid of anything.

You were, though.

You were terrified.

You kept telling yourself to get up, to go home before anyone noticed, before the world came crashing back in. But then she looked at you really looked and every excuse in your head just melted.

Her hair was messy, her voice still rough from sleep when she said, “You’re thinking too loud again.”

You laughed, nervous. “Can’t help it.”

“Yeah, you can,” she murmured, scooting a little closer. “Just… stop.”

Easy for her to say. Your brain was screaming. You can’t do this. You shouldn’t want this. What would your mom say? But your heart wasn’t listening.

Ellie’s hand brushed against yours, slow, hesitant like she was asking without words.

And somehow, you found the courage to answer.

You turned to face her. Her green eyes caught the sunlight, and for a second, you forgot how to breathe. She looked at you the same way she played her guitar soft but deliberate, like she knew exactly what she was doing.

Then she leaned in, just enough for you to feel her breath on your lips. You didn’t think you just moved.

The kiss was small, barely there, but it hit like a spark in your chest. Warm, gentle, terrifying. You could taste mint and something sweet, maybe coffee from earlier, maybe her.

When you finally pulled back, your hands were shaking. So were hers.

Neither of you said anything at first. Just… breathed.

Then Ellie smiled, that lazy, crooked grin that made you want to hide and laugh at the same time. “Took you long enough,” she whispered.

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t stop smiling either. “Shut up.”

She laughed quietly, brushing her thumb against your cheek. “You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

“Ellie—” you started, but your voice gave out halfway through her name.

“Yeah?” she asked, still grinning.

“Nothing,” you whispered, shaking your head, the smile slipping back onto your lips.

Because you didn’t have words for how it felt the sunlight, the softness, the ache in your chest that wasn’t fear this time.

It was something else.

Something real.

💔 Viraj Dobriyal One-Shot | Angst / Dark Genre: Angst, Dark Romance, Psychological Drama Summary: On the day of your wedding, Viraj Dobriyal walks in—calm, composed, and unshakable—claiming you as his own. What was meant to be freedom begins to feel like the prison he has already built around you.

This is Part 2 to Some Changes Are Needed*

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When Lilith opened the door, Corbin gave her a small, uncharacteristically sincere smile. Corbin fidgeted slightly, making him seem nervous.

"Uh... hi?" Lilith said, wondering why he stopped out of the blue.

"Hey..." Corbin said quietly, the word slightly drawn out. Lilith frowned- that was unlike Corbin.

"Wha-"

"You cut your hair," Corbin said, cutting her off. He gestured for Lilith to continue.

"Yeah. Just now, acutally," Lilith said, flustered. "Would you like to come inside?" She sweeped her arm across Corbin's view of the room.

"Sure," Corbin said, tentatively stepping into her house. As they made their way over to the couch, Lilith wondered what made Corbin want to come over.

"So... what did you need?"

"What makes you think that I need anything?" Corbin asked, shocked.

"I don't know, maybe the fact that every time you've come over you've asked for something? Or are you here because something bad happened and you don't want to tell me?"

"What?"

"Don't think I haven't noticed how you keep on wringing your hands together." She pointed to his hands which were wrung together so tight that it looked like it hurt. "I pick up on these kinds of things, you know? I am your friend after all. So, spill."

"Fine. My parents kicked me out and I was wondering if you would be willing to let me stay here. I can pay for rent and groceries. Anything you need." His eyes looked down at the floor and he shook his head. "I knew this would be pointless, I just wanted to try."

"You can stay here." His head snapped up.

"Really? This isn't some sort of trick?"

"No. No trick. One thing though."

"What is it?"

"Rent is $325 per month."

"That cheap?"

"Yep. Because we are sharing this house, I am halving the rent for you."

"Thanks." His voice seemed pleasantly surprised and sincere.

Time jump

After moving Corbin into the room down the hall, Lilith went back into her bedroom and looked at her messages. Most of them consisted of 'Where were you?' and 'Why didn't you show?' but there was the occasional rude remark about how someone knew she wouldn't show because she was herself and whatnot.

She looked at the messages from her partner and immediately saw the one that said 'You didn't show? You are so rude to me and our friends. We are through.' As soon as she read that, she laughed.

"Wow," She mumbled. "I don't show up for one date and we are through. I guess they really didn't care about me." She fell asleep after a few minutes of lying down.

Lilith woke up to the tantalizing smell of baked goods. When she got downstairs, her jaw dropped at the sheer amount of pastries and danishes on the counter. Corbin sat at the counter drinking a cup of coffee and eating a cheese danish.

"Hey," Corbin said. "I decided to make breakfast. I hope that's okay?"

"Okay? This is amazing!" Lilith responded. "How did you have time to make all of this?" She asked, grabbing one of the danishes and pouring herself a cup of warm water for her tea.

"I wake up early," was Corbin's only reply.

"Oh," Lilith said, surprised. She looked at the clock, wondering what time it was. "I've got to go to my university. Don't burn the place down while I'm gone, alright?"

Another time jump

After her classes, Lilith headed back to her house. When she got there, she checked to see if Corbin was home. He wasn't. Good.

She went into her bathroom and looked into the mirror. The cuts on her arms weren't healing as quickly as she would've hoped. In fact, they were bright red.

Corbin walked into Lilith's bedroom, wondering where she could've gone. The adjoining bathroom door was open so he took his chances. When he walked in, he wasn't expecting to be greeted by Lilith holding a blade up to her arm.

"Hey, what're you doing?" She pressed the blade against her skin, having not heard Corbin. "Lilith! Stop! Please!" Corbin's voice broke slightly on the last word. Still, Lilith couldn't hear him.

The last thing that Lilith saw before she blacked out was Corbin reaching for her shoulder.

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okie doke here’s a lil masterpost!

here’s a post i made comparing angst to the classical tragedy as a way to approach it

here’s a forum for angst tips on ffn

and here’s another one (scroll down more)

here’s a blog post about it (don’t miss the next button)

here’s a really good breakdown of how to go about angst 

here’s a guide to the character side of writing angst

and here are some general ‘how to write phanfic’ posts that apply to angst as well

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i think the main tip would be don’t allow your writing to wallow in self pity for too long. if you just drag on and on about how terrible everything is it starts to lose its impact. Some of the most effective angst stories barely mention the terrible things, at least not explicitly - take for example this -read it, see if you can figure out what makes it so effective and angst filled despite the lack of angst. i also really love helenismylover’s angst as it’s super poetic and awesome 

hope this helps!