#alter human

I don’t have paws, I don’t have fur or a mussel, I don’t feel a prey drive, I don’t long to run on all fours.

I just get annoyed with how they’ve taken over my entire feed. Yes, sometimes they have genuinely insightful things to say, and I want to listen to that. I just can’t relate to anything they say unless it’s a profound thought about the community.

Hey selkies, mermaids, and anyone chasing that ethereal, flowy hair dream 🌊

If you swim a lot, deal with hard water, chlorine damage, dry ends, or just want hair that feels like it belongs in a fairy tale, this one’s for you.

I developed this Silky Selkie Hair Oil as a selkie who refuses to let pool water or everyday life wreck my long hair. It’s super simple - no boiling, no fancy equipment. Just gentle heating on the stove (or even no heat if you prefer), a quick mix, and into a recycled glass bottle.

It works beautifully on ALL hair types

Straight, wavy, curly, coily, fine, thick, any color. I’ve tested it on lots of different beings hair and it adapts amazingly well. It’s especially great as a detangler and leave in oil - keep in mind that a little really does go a long way and too much can make hair look greasy, yet used sparingly on damp or dry hair (especially the ends and mid-lengths) it leaves everything soft, shiny, and manageable.

My Exact Ingredients (for ~150 mL batch)

Here’s what I used (approximate measurements that fill a 150 mL bottle nicely. Adjust as needed):

4–5 tablespoons coconut oil (base moisturizer)

3–4 tablespoons avocado oil (for deep nourishment and shine)

1–2 tablespoons petroleum jelly (for extra slip and protection — melts in easily)

1 teaspoon vitamin E oil (for preservation and added hair benefits)

5–7 drops rosemary essential oil (for growth and scalp health)

Optional: 3–5 drops ylang-ylang essential oil (for floral scent balance and scalp benefits)

Note: You can swap or adjust the carrier oils based on what you have. The totals should come out around 150 mL.

Step-by-Step: How I Made Mine

1: Measure the coconut oil, avocado oil, and petroleum jelly into a heat-safe container.

2: Warm gently on the stove (low heat or double-boiler style) until everything melts and combines smoothly - do not boil.

3: Remove from heat and stir in the vitamin E oil.

4: Add the rosemary essential oil (and ylang-ylang if using). Stir well.

5: Let it cool slightly, then funnel into your clean, recycled opaque glass bottle (I use a 150 mL lotion pump bottle that works beautifully; a spray bottle could work too).

6: Shake gently, label it, and store in a cool, dark, dry place.

It stays fresh for months when stored properly!

Why it works:

Chlorine & hard water shield: Oil your hair before swimming (after a cold water rinse) to lock out the harsh stuff that strips natural oils and makes hair dry/brittle.

Moisture & shine: The coconut, avocado, and petroleum jelly nourish deeply, while rosemary and optional ylang-ylang boost scalp health and softness.

Long-lasting: A 150 mL batch lasts me months (I’ve had mine ~6 months with no rancidity).

How I Use My Selkie Oil:

Pre-swim ritual: Wet hair with cold water, apply a good amount (make it a little greasy, trust me), braid or pin it up tight against your head. Reapply every 2-4 hours if you’re in the water a long time. The oil helps lock out chlorine and keeps moisture in.

Daily/after wash: Focus on the ends and mid-lengths as a leave-in. You don’t need to wash your ends every time - buildup of good oils/conditioner helps protect against breakage. Great for detangling too!

Pro tip: Use a pea-sized amount to start. Warm it in your palms first. For deeper treatment, apply more, leave on 30-60 min (or overnight), then shampoo.

It’s been a game-changer for me. My hair feels softer, stronger, and way less prone to snapping at the ends. Whether you have dry hair, swim daily, or just want that selkie shine, give it a try!

Would love to hear your variations or results if you make it 💌