#afirst

Quiet.

God, what is wrong with me?

Nothing was real when I woke up.

I don’t know if anything matters here,

It’s like any decision is all play in a game, and that hurts,

Because I know the breathe in my lungs wasn’t ever part of a game.

So, I’m feeling left behind, lost, asking - why am I feeling so played?

Is there a lie I’m missing, so that I might stop reminiscing, and lay my head back 

Like I’ve got no memories to play back?

I’m not trynna sleep, yet I can’t help but feel like everyone is trynna tell me to get

Back to sleep.

Why should I be quiet in my sleep if I can’t even be quiet while you sleep?

Woke while you sleep? 

Why is there so much love for this sleep, that’s not llivin’?

I’m trynna get up and get started with my day and all anyone wants to do is play 

In their sleep.

How is it still night time for everybody by now?

The sun is usually shining by now, with bright faces of joy for life by now.

What is this world I’m in right now?

Am I dreaming right now?

Am I lost?

Am I confused about the time of day it is?

Is this even real?

Can anybody even hear me speak? 

Or am I already dead, and should be in bed instead?

Quiet.