#ad speak

having never been through anything serious enough to need a hospital or anything even close, last time having been when her mother passed, adelaide was happy whenever she came to and grayson was there, letting them know he could stay. she didn't think anyone would be able to get him to leave, anyway. and if there was anyone who was going to make sure no one did anything she didn't want, it was him. being awake had been agonizing the first few days but she didn't want herbs or drugs, nothing that might make her head foggier than it was. sleeping was the only time she felt nothing, not even nightmares or dreams plagued her. sometimes it was easier to settle when grayson was beside her. she wasn't sure how or why. it was when she woke up and her throat burned that she remembered the flames taking over the school, smoke filling her lungs till she had no more air left, and all of her light suddenly snuffed out in one painful thud. since, every movement felt like one giant bruise on her body, but it would be better than losing more time than she did while she slept. aside from making sure she wasn't given anything, adelaide asked grayson to make sure taz was okay; to which he reluctantly agreed. her two biggest worries were taken care of and that was enough for the time being. as she was able to return home, he was one of the few that would stop by, make sure she was okay. she couldn't admit it because she felt ungrateful, but she didn't like it. it made her feel helpless. despite always getting into trouble, she always found her way out — alone. classes should have been starting but instead adelaide was at the keyboard in her apartment — not at the beautiful grand piano that she hoped wasn't gone too. just the thought immediately makes her eyes well up. it was supposed to be a good week. she had it all planned out and had been looking forward to starting since she got the job. it just seemed fated that it was this week. what a joke. may she shouldn't have been ignoring the bad feelings as of late, pretending everything was fine. the text comes a few minutes before her door opens. adelaide doesn't move from where she sits, still playing out her melancholy since she can't sing it. even taz' happy pitter patter as she greets the wolf doesn't break much of adelaide's attention from playing. even though she's still in pain, she can't sit still anymore and fills most of her time doing just this. it finally quiets as she turns and gives grayson a wave, refraining from speaking as much as she can. but her interest is piqued when noticing him carrying something and she winces as she stands, trying to decide whether the short walk over is worth it. another wave, this one for his attention, she points and makes a little 'what' motion with raised hands.

it didn't matter if adelaide was out late the night before or her night was plagued by nightmares, she rose with the sun, preferring the quiet of early morning and the smell of fresh dew that still lingered. it helped clear her busy mind — busy with words and feelings not always her own. somehow it seemed even the ghosts knew to give her a break. an herbal tea warms her hands and taz trots at her side while she walks towards the park, smiling at a familiar face in the distance. ❝ you're out early. it's nice, right? ❞ almost feels like they could trust things will be okay.

adelaide could practically hear her friend's voice in her ears, telling — no, demanding — she not waste being dressed up. ender helped her pick out the dress she was using for a night singing, but the night was still young and it seemed silly to go home. most decisions she made were on a whim, going with how she felt. and it was a good enough reason for the woman to go see him. the door opens and whatever was on addie's mind vanishes when she sees fletcher's face, mouth lifting into a smile. ❝ hi. ❞ even with the few inches her heels give her, she has to press into the balls of her feet to place a kiss on his cheek. ❝ i hope it's okay i just came by. i wanted to see you. ❞ wearing her heart on her sleeve came easy. just saying the thing; whatever it was in that moment. ❝ actually, i wanted you to see me. ❞ an admission that comes with a warmth starting to spread from her cheeks.

everyone's magic going back to normal seemed like a good sign. or it should have been, but not all were so pleased, even with the recent festivities. adelaide wanted to be excited too. she loved things like this, that brought people together for a moment of fun. but suddenly being able to hear again was more overwhelming than she thought it would be, when her magic went back to normal. and now she was seeing things? it was only a glimpse through the passing bodies, while she'd stopped to grab some water at a stand. surely her mind was playing tricks on her, but the singer has to make sure. she heads towards the raffles, where she thought she saw him. a game of hide and seek that only she's in on. a sickening thought crosses adelaide's mind during her search. please don't let him be a ghost. because that would mean ... a head shake attempts to rid her of what she knew it would mean. the hybrid feels like she could vomit as she wades through the crowd until she spots him and is certain it's him. the nausea doesn't subside. when she is sure, all she can do is stare, paralyzed by the disbelief that of all the times she wished to go back, visit someone she missed, and yet this is what the universe gave her. maybe ade had been frozen for too long, he must have been able to feel her eyes searing into him, eventually grayson looks her way. she can see the recognition happen in real time finally jolting her out of stasis. but instead of rushing towards her past, like ade usually did, wishing to cling to those left behind, she turns, walking another way, any other way, just to remove herself from something she has an inkling will dampened her mood even further.

adelaide had loved having a little place to practice with her magic while also helping lucien out. she was pretty addicted to midnight steep and since getting to know lucien, adelaide was touched the vampire trusted her enough. which was why at the current moment, she was freaking out a little. lucien was going to be there any minute and their garden was starting to resemble a jungle a little. every time she focused hard enough to get one plant back to it's original state, another two grew multiple feet high. when she hears the gate, ade weaves between the plants, nervous smile on her face when she locks eyes with the vampire. ❝ i'm working on it. i promise. ❞

unless in need of some soothing, adelaide didn't really listen to music while walking around. her mind was constantly making its own and she liked to hear the sounds around her to counter everything else she normally heard. except, even with nature and whatever noise might linger in the distance, everything was eerily quiet for the hybrid who was currently deaf to the dead and the greenery around her. so music filled her personal silence, ear buds in while she walked around the bookstore and lack of attention causing her not to hear a voice, only noticing and jumping when tapped. ❝ sorry, am i in the way?, ❞ she asks, pausing the music and putting away her headphones.

adelaide wasn't quite ready to go home yet, not wanting to walk through the thick fog on her own. it was a little scary. but mostly just dispiriting. day in and day out, much of the same. the temperature had a rise but it wasn't fulfilling enough. for possibly the first time since getting to portum, the hybrid felt homesick. she missed new orleans. it might be warm and humid at this time, but she ached for it. in trying to make portum her new home, it wasn't a great feeling to have. a familiar face at the bar perks her up, a reason not to go anywhere for a while. maybe she could even convince the vampire to walk her home later. ❝ can you make me something that will remind me of being on the beach? virgin, please. ❞ she sits in front of koda, taking a quick glance around when settling on the stool, letting her gaze come back to the other when she finishes her brief survey of the bar. ❝ do you ever miss london, koda? ❞