!Welcome Malcolm to the Australian Bois with London Girlfriends club!
On a rare break from consistently summiting K2, whether it be with his brother or as a guide, Malcolm was flying home. Although really he wasn’t even flying home. He was flying to you. In London.
As expected, you had met him on one such K2 excursion years back and you’d kept in touch. And keeping in touch led to other things and now you’d been back to K2 innumerable times. And the two of you were certainly together.
Malcolm liked London, on the few occasions he’d been. Only this time you had a surprise for him you thought he might enjoy, as a mountaineer. Sure, you could drive him to summit something a little smaller elsewhere in the UK but, there was something right here in London that you thought would be just as good.
But maybe you’d thought too much or got to excited or thought he might enjoy it a little too much. Because you were met with a blank stare and a fairly grumpy face;
“What?!” Your question was innocent enough
“We’re doing what?!”
“Climbing the O2!”
“...The venue...?” He blinked slowly and raised an eyebrow, “Why would we wanna do that...?”
“It’ll be fun!” You tried not to sound so disheartened
“...Fun?” He places his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels; “I climb stuff every day...”
None the less your enthusiasm allowed you to drag him across London. “Mal! You’ll see the sky line from up there!”
He indicated to the high-rise window of your apartment; “I can see it from here!”
“But you’ll be outside in the middle of it all in climbing gear...!”
Malcolm sighed gently and gave a kiss to your forehead, trying not to roll those pretty brown eyes of his again. And fought the urge to tell you that if he wanted to climb and see skylines, he wouldn’t be at K2 all the time.
***
So here you were, day of, and really excited. And Malcolm trying his best to (obviously) fake it didn’t even deter your spirits. Sure, you had also done K2 before but you didn’t live there all climbing season like he did. It wasn’t your life’s work. Most of the time you had a normal city job, climbing was more of a hobby to you.
You spent a lot of the short briefing watching his face. And you could see him fluctuating between bored out of his mind and dying to ask which mountains your guide had climbed before to be such an expert at this. Like Malcolm didn’t just get up in the morning, put his stuff on and decided to take a leisurely stroll somewhere across K2. Especially as K2 was so technical. This would be easier than a walk in the park for him and both of you knew it.
He was incredibly silent as he got ready. In about 5 seconds. And left you playing catch up.
Alright show off, why don’t you lead the expedition!?
You knew the only reason he wasn’t mouthing off was because of you; which you supposed was at least a little endearing.
Still, it got him noticed, and you watched the guide, Kirsty, pull him aside: “Gotta say that was quick! You done this before?!”
Malcolm gave a laugh “Uh, similar...”
“Oh really?! Like what-!?”
“I, uh...” He looked back to you like he needed permission to show off. Clipped into place you were the second person done; you gave him a gentle nod, to which you received a grin. You supposed he’d agreed to come after all that whining, so he deserved to brag a little bit; “...I spend a portion of my year up at K2 base camp with my brother...!”
“Sh—oot! Really!?”
“Mm hmm...!” Though it was obvious that Malcolm was going to bask in the glory of this.
“Gotta say I’m impressed. Everest is the tall one but K2 is the harder right?”
“Yeah. K2 is my favourite...though she might hit me if I say otherwise...!” You eyed him at that; here he goes again, curse me for letting him!!
“She also a mountaineer?”
“Nah-! But I did meet here there!”
“NAH-!?” You repeated, walking over and smacking his arm, “Nah-!?”
“Uh... that’s... not exactly your job is it!”
You raised an eyebrow at him, he could talk considering him and his brothers antics; “It’s laughable you call it a job.”
“I’ll have you know-!”
“Okayyy!” Kirsty laughed, “I don’t want to be responsible for a /break/ up at the O2!”
You and Malcolm both made the same painful sound before laughing. Which made her smile; at least you were both fans of terrible puns!
***
“So who wants to lead?”
There was silence as any nerves set in for those around you; and Malcolm blew a breath out.
“I’ll do it.” Well, now he just looked like the loud-mouth flaunty Australian; but he didn’t care. Still he didn’t manage to escape you giving him a look. He probably wanted to get this over as soon as possible, you weren’t sure you’d forgive him for that one easily.
“Oh...” Kirsty laughed, “I guess that makes sense!” She latched him onto the cabling and folded her arms; “You know if you lead you’re also responsible for getting people off at the end, right?”
You knew that was the wrong choice of words by the way he tried and failed to hold back a smirk.
“Darlin’, I’m a mountaineer... I think I got this...” but then he playfully nudged you, “responsible for gettin’ people off... Y/N!”
You scoffed; “Ha! Getting people off, my ass.”
“You fu-”
You placed your hand over his mouth, knowing what was coming from the glint in his brown eyes; “You don’t have to tell everyone in London Town Malcolm!!”
He gave a shrug, turning to look up to the minuscule summit as if it was K2 all over again; “I reckon you’re pretty loud enough to tell everyone in base camp...”
“MALCOLM!” Your embarrassed exclamation only served to have him laugh loudly, which drew more attention to the two of you.
“Don’t worry babe...” he turned with a wink “I’m pretty loud too!”
Oh yeah like that helped.
As expected from an experienced mountain climber, and you determined to stay hot on his heels after that initial she’s not a mountaineer comment, you and Malcolm were half way up in barely any time at all. He stopped and turned around, fixing you with his brown eyes;
“What?!”
“F**king look at this-! This is what you’ve made me a part of...!” You turned, realising how far back the rest of the group were.
“Oh.”
“Yeah f**king oh - this is unbelievable! I could do this eyes closed and backwards..!”
You folded your arms; “Why don’t you then?!”
He squinted at you, you’d watched that safety video too, right? “Thems the rules sweetheart.”
“Oh!” There was surprise in your sarcasm; “I didn’t realise you played by the rules!”
“Oh, don’t you start on me!”
“I always start on you.”
He tipped his head and frowned in agreement. “Eh. True.”
You waited against the wire support for everyone to at least catch up a little. Malcolm muttering to himself about how he’d be at the top of K2 by now, and you every so often jabbing his side because you were a little sick of his complaining.
As soon as everyone was within a few feet of you again he was off, without a care in the world. And you had to roll your eyes; I swear to god Malcolm Bench...
Once you got to the top Kirsty decided she’d come up and help you out. “...Now at the climax of your journey.” Malcolm raised an eyebrow at her, with that same smirk. And even you hid your snort behind your hand.
“Well now you’re just doing it on f**king purpose.”
She gave a little shrug; “Who can say...” Undoing the chain to the platform and uncoupling him from the bars, she gave him a smile. “You’re free, mountaineer!”
“Uh-! I thought I was supposed to be getting everyone off-!”
You leant on the rail yourself, smirking at the perfect opportunity presenting itself; “Aw, c’mon Mal, you can’t have all the fun now...”
Kirsty couldn’t help but laugh loudly at your comment, and he looked between the two of you. Trying to remain unimpressed; “Oh I see, you two are out to get me.”
“Got that right...” She pushed him onto the platform without a second thought and turned to you; “You’re a saint.”
“Oh. I know...” you stepped up and let her uncouple you; “Think you’re getting me off better than he would.”
Malcolm folded his arms, but he was grinning; “You’re f**king unbelievable! Both of you!”
***
You knew he was trying not to say it was impressive. But the way he swivelled around the little platform let you know that he was. Holding a plastic glass of champagne in his hands made him look the part - but also so out of place - and you couldn’t help almost crack up. Once he was satisfied he’d taken in the Skyline view, he turned his attention to a better one and strolled over to you.
“Well, now I feel like a Champagne connoisseur...”
“Oh yeah, and look like one.”
He pushed you gently with his elbow, “Sarcasm?! Now that’s not very nice is it!” Malcolm cleared his throat “...Here I am on my roof top, exclusive and private... looking out over London Town... thinking about where my private jet might be taking me next.”
“Back to K2?”
“Was that a question? you wanna go... or just a suggestion.”
“Would you take me back?”
“Hell yeah!!” Those brown eyes brightened considerably, “... Question is are we leaving Cyril at base camp?”
“That’s...” you tried not to smile at the look on his face, “...uh. Mean!”
“I think he’d rather not be there, don’t you!?”
“I dunno! He’s alright, I like him.”
“Look, just f**king agree to come!”
A second smile threatened, “Mmmmm... What exactly are you asking me to agree to?”
If you could take a snap shot of his picture-perfect realisation, and wicked grin, then you would; “F**k me...! Bad girl...” he took a sip of champagne, “Later...”
“That’s the idea...” That caused Malcolm to almost choke, and he glared at you with that smirk on your face “... Yes, I’ll climb K2 with you again, babe.”
He clinked his plastic glass against yours “I’ll drink to that... babe.”
You watched him wander around the platform with his phone, taking pictures and couldn't help but follow his footsteps giggling.
"What's so funny?!"
"You and whatever you're doing!"
"I'm sending photographed to my brother!!"
"Oh - uh huh?" You folded your arms, "Can't be that bad if you're giving Cyril the ’Look Where I Am’ treatment."
Malcolm opened his mouth to somewhat agree with you, realised that was a bad move and narrowed his eyes, pointing at you instead; "Not that I would ever concede that point!"
You shook your head with a small smile at his defiance. Oh Malcolm. Your mistake is thinking you can only concede verbally...
***
After being hooked back to the climbing apparatus, Malcolm was surprisingly quiet for most of the way down. Kirsty (for some reason) trusted him enough to make his own way with you; and now he had a lot to think about. He would be going back to base camp in a few weeks - could he get you out before the season was over? He sure hoped so; but then how much planning and logistics would that take?
Suddenly he stopped, realising that he should be enjoying the moment with you rather than pondering what happens next, and you almost crashed into him.
"Mal-! Think before you stop babe!!"
He raised an eyebrow as he turned, at the irony of that sentence. "I was thinking..."
"Oh..." He realised he'd played right into it, when you smirked and responded with "Makes a nice change..."
Malcolm wasn't even going to give you the satisfaction of a smile at that, and instead held his hand out "Come on... Let me help you down..."
You were hesitant for the notion of him trying to throw you off the side, or trip you up on purpose - but you realised why he was asking for your hand. He'd done the same thing on your first ascent of K2 together.
"That's sweet of you..." You took his offer, threading your fingers with his; "...I could really use some help getting down... I'm glad I found a guide just in time."
That one was clearly for his Ego, and it worked by the smile on his face, but he remained quiet. He wouldn't tell you to shut up just yet...
When you got to the bottom, he nigh on made you run the steepest section. And slowed up to free himself.
"Thank GOD that's over!!!" He said loud enough to hope Kirsty also heard it, and beckoned you towards him. There was a threatening look on your face and he thought he might get hit again, mercifully you decided against that. He released you gently but kept ahold of your harness for his punchline; "See, I'm a good guy. I get my girlfriend off first!"
You tried not to laugh at that, but then hit him for making you laugh so he was no better off; only this time he laughed along. "She better be the only one you get off!!"
"Ahhhh---! I mean, no promises! That is my job..." He let you go, "But I mean, yeah... I'm pretty sure you promised me later."
"How the hell does anyone ever get you to shut up?"
Malcolm tipped his head, with a grin and a laugh "hmmm... Get me off, maybe?"
"Oh, for God’s sake!" You leant forward and kissed him.
"...Oh yeah..." Now his voice was quiet "...that... might work..."
You both stepped away for a minute, and he took your hand back in his as you raised your eyes back to the 'summit.'
"Another mountain to check of the list... Mal."
"Oh for sure, and as difficult as any other..." He gave a smile and pulled you closer into him; "...K2 next...?"
"Oh... It'll be a walk in the park after this one..."
You both laughed, but he nudged you gently "I dunno... Some stuff’s just easier with you around, ain't it..."
You shot him a look "Don't you start..."
He grinned, looking back to that brilliant London skyline; "... What, would you rather I was joking?"
---
