being really nice and respectful when i disagree with people online so they know im not a threat and dont attack me (like one would approach a wild animal)
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being really nice and respectful when i disagree with people online so they know im not a threat and dont attack me (like one would approach a wild animal)

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Okay guys please I’m normal. I’m normal and normal. 😭🙏But I need to confess something because yesterday’s anniversary really made it hit so much deeper. 👑❤️ Ever since Techno passed, I have to watch or listen to at least a few minutes of a Technoblade video every single morning while I get ready. 🏃♂️💨It’s literally my auditory and visual coffee. ☕️✨I usually get dressed to music to wake myself up, but as an HSP (highly sensitive person), music leaves my feelings all out in the open. 🎧💔 So I HAVE to follow it up with Techno’s voice right when I'm putting my shoes on. My absolute favorites are the Dream SMP streams. Honestly, I am still so stuck in that era. Even though the server ended, it never actually ended for me. 🌲⚔️ His calm, deadpan, completely unbothered confidence in those streams acts like an emotional shield for my brain. 🛡️🐷This year hit like a freight train because it's my very first year actively honoring and celebrating his memory. 💔🗓️ I never realized how vital this routine was until TODAY when I rushed and forgot it. My day was ABSOLUTELY GOD-AWFUL. It completely fucked me up. 📉💀You know how when you forget your morning caffeine, and you go into a workday and every single goddamn thing is just ticking you off and irritating you? That was me today. 😤💥 If I don’t have him, even just for a few seconds, it literally feels like the Earth is being shattered open and emotional lava is pouring out. I was super hypersensitive—literally kind of like being on your period—and everything was just pissing me off because I went into the world without my armor. I never want to forget my ritual ever again. 😭❌PLEASE tell me I’m not the only one dealing with this exact same thing, especially right now after the anniversary? 🙏🥺 If you use his past streams as a neurological stabilization tool to get through the day, please share your stories in the reblogs/comments. I really need to hear that other fans are like this too. 🔄💻
I love you
Not perfectly, but completely
With everything i have
I love you with no reason or rhyme
I love you without expectations or conditions
I just love you.
Fate may have lead you to me,
But it was my choice then, and my choice everyday till the end of time, to love you. Even if a day comes when you don't feel the same.
This is me letting you go, not because we don't love each other. But because my happiness is your happiness.
I just hope you remember, when all things settle and you find yourself ready for love. I hope you'll consider coming back to me. Because no matter how much time passes or how far you go, I choose to love only you.
If not, then I just hope you'll be happy.
Thank you for loving me. Thank you for making me happy.
Tumblr is such an odd place you think you’ve followed someone when you like a post because then you see a bajillion more posts and wow you like them all and then it asks if you want to follow them? I wasn’t following them? Hell yeah I want to follow them?! I forget that unlike literally any other platform mostly the like (or rather note) button on this app actually shows you more of what you like
it’s almost 2am, and I’m over here overthinking about my whole existence. And tryna find a job but no one is hiring or they don’t respond back
SO HEY
I could use some distractions for when I wake up so go spam my inbox with whatever stuff I guess or questions

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Do you think dogs know what clothes are or do they just watch us change clothes and think, "o the human is taking off their skin again."
I remember last year when I hemorrhaged, lost over 2 liters of blood and almost bled out to death, then went back to work a month later and HR asked me if I was religious and could maybe find hope in god during this hard time and I just sat there like “dude, let’s say he’s real, how the fuck am I supposed to find hope in the motherfucker who almost let me bleed out on the bathroom floor, are you kidding me?”
fuck, I hope god is real, I am his biggest hater and I need that steady flow of spite and anger and hatred to stay edgy and relatable, it’s good for the plot and also for character development. also I’d really like to blame every minor inconvenience on divine punishment because god has a personal problem with me. I’m gonna fuck a priest in a church and laugh at god for getting hard hearing me moan, “can you find hope in god?” bitch, don’t piss me off.
my favorite kind of people are those who, when asked about a topic they are like. officially An Expert on, go "yeah i might know a little bit about that topic" just to fuck w/ people. pure love of the game