#150721

day 197/548 of jimin's military service

this selca was posted on 150721 with the caption:

A guy who has pretty lips #JIMIN

Don't come near me if you don't plan on staying. Don't think my problems and behavior are cute. Don't think you can magically 'change' and/or 'save' and/or 'cure' me.

I'm unstable. Really freaking much. I don't deal well with my emotions, basically just not at all. I have a lot of moodswings. They consume me and i'm drowning in them. I have flashbacks during the day and nightmares at night. I zone out. I don't want to eat. I cut. I lie. I hide. I have many many secrets. I try to kill myself from time to time. I don't trust people. I have skyhigh walls. I can't stand touching at times. Other times, i need a lot of reassurance and comforting. Basically, i am a mess and a whole bunch of problems.

I have a great mask irl, but in fact, i am just completely losing my shit. I live a double life, every day and night.

You'll have to put in a lot (and lots and lots and lots) of effort before you even get to see a glimpse of the real me. You'll have to be careful. It'll take a lot of energy. It'll be tiring. It'll be frustrating. I will literally try to push you away, even when i might not even want to.