Jun 5
one for the memories, two for the flame three for the silence, four for the shame
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one for the memories, two for the flame three for the silence, four for the shame
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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another wip that I probably wont finish
(reference by byul_moment)
thinking about her lips and hands and neck and hair and fingers and teeth and voice and chest and eyes and hips and thighs and wrists and tongue and smile
thinking about how it feels to let everything go for a little while and how strange it is to have someone be with you while you do it and how surreal it feels to go back to not letting anything go, almost like you want to save it for when this happens
thinking it all gets so hazy in so many ways because you can’t even tell what was up or down but somehow this specific sensation is so clear in my mind that i can just lay in bed close my eyes and go back then and i get clenched fists and shaky thighs and tightness and i float
thinking about words and looks and time and how it all stretched into something else entirely like a morning wasn’t just a morning, you could feel it all like some sort of full unlimited slice of time that no one could muddy or take away from your hands because in your hands was something bigger and i was in your hands also
Moonbyul - Hertz | MCountdown 260326
intimacy that went so deep i feel like i’ve been carrying it around like perfume on my skin and it won’t ever disappear like something deeply embedded because it’s been in that place for a long time except with this it only had to be there for a little while to find its place into my skin
walls going back up in my head and me banging against them right away because i know what’s behind them and i won’t let it get away from me, and knowing what those walls are made of and that they don’t stand a chance against what’s waiting for me when i’m going to bring them down
knowing how my body doesn’t just wake for it, it’s breathing for it and it’s pulsing for it and it’s running for it and it’s sweating for it and it’s clutching for it and it’s biting for it and it’s screaming for it
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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heatwave mood is me laying in bed with my shirt half off with my hands on my boobs daydreaming about
i hate the fact that i’m not beautiful, and i don’t mean having a pretty face or body because i don’t think anyone who matters actually cares about that too much at the end of it all, and i don’t have either of those anyways because i’m not pretty like that, but i mean i can’t stop feeling i lack something that would have made me shine or fill the space around me with something special and interesting and full and instead i’m just here and i exist and i take things inside of me but nothing good pours out of me that people would remember me by, i don’t make a dent, i hate the fact that i censor myself out of fear and i hate the fact that maybe even if i didn’t censor myself nothing would come out anyways so being quiet it’s just an excuse to pretend like i am not empty, it is one thing to feel like what i do is completely empty, you should still be able to find matter in what you are but what am i apart from just here and just doing the same things over and over again until one time it goes down the right path? what am i to myself? and what am i to anyone at all? i couldn’t say a word about either because if i started only bad words would start pouring out because i haven’t done enough and i don’t know when i’m going to be able to sit down and give up and think “i’m nothing but i tried to be something” and just let it go. things are happening to me but i’m not happening to them and so if i wasn’t here it would be the same it’s just that those things would happen to someone else instead. and i don’t like how my identity shifts away from me so easily even when i try so hard to stand and take everything in and not close my eyes to anything, clarity about everything else except me and this thing i have right in front of my face that i can’t do anything about and what i do defines me so i end up being nothing