#;clive

Then why don't you?

Clive swallows hard, his face turning red. He has to admit that he may have let this go too far, but how can he deny himself? He always told himself that his attraction to men was purely aesthetic, nothing else, nothing more, but then he met Maurice...and it seems to him that that isn't entirely the case anymore.

He stares at Maurice for a long moment, the seconds crawling by as the silence hangs between them, heavy and tangible. He glances over Maurice's shoulder, listens for a moment to make sure no one's going to barge in, and it seems he's made up his mind. Hands come up to cup Maurice's face, thumbs brushing along his cheeks...and he kisses him. It's soft and only lasts a few moments, and when he pulls away, his hands are trembling.

The coffee shop is curiously crowded for this time of day--mostly couples that Date doesn’t really want to intrude on. So instead he finds himself standing awkwardly next to a table that only one person is seated at currently, and he appears to be working on something. Hopefully he won’t mind, though.

“You don’t mind if I sit here, do you? Usually I’d sit by myself but...it seems everywhere else is...taken.”

He’s really needing to sit down before he crashes, and he’ll go ahead and try the heart cookie too. 

It's difficult. More difficult than anything Clive has ever had to do in his life. He'll admit that he invited Maurice to stay on a whim, some kind of impulse that he ought to have known better than to do because now it's hard. It's hard to see him and not think of what they were before he was pressured into marriage, before he was forced to hide a part of himself that all the ancients that lived before him considered natural and part of life.

It's the middle of the night. He hovers outside of the guest bedroom, debating, wondering if he should even bother. Clive can admit he said some cutting things when he ended their relationship. Would Maurice even want to talk about it? Should he even bother? Clive swallows hard, his hands trembling. Sokrates loved Alkibiades and Alexander loved Hephastion, but even they had wives, in the end. Because that's what you're supposed to do, isn't it? Have a wife and children and a lovely home and, and...

He knocks.

Still, looking over the paperwork he’s been given, some of the details are missing. It seemed true that he wasn’t the only one to have gotten involved in an...incident...during that event, so the crime reports were flooding in. He stands up from his desk, ready to go ask Prosecutor Sahdmadhi where this took place, when he sees a familiar face. 

“Oh.”

It’s about all he can say at the moment. There’s an awkward silence as they stare at each other, and Date tries to come up with something to say. 

“Uh...You, um, look like you’re doing better?”

Yeah, that’s a stellar thing to say, Date. “He looks like he’s doing better,” yeah no fucking thanks to you! 

hes demisexual. he much prefers to show physical affection via cuddling or kissing or sitting in someones lap but if you give him enough time and attention and care, he'll eventually come around to having sex. i think he thought he was only really aesthetically attracted to men, no sex wanted, but then he met maurice and got so attached to him that he was like 🧍‍♂️OH,

hes got an anxiety disorder. he works himself up to the point of blacking out sometimes. its Not Good lmao

the whole thing w/ him breaking up w/ maurice is definitely bc of societal pressure and bc he was Scared. i do think he couldve gone about it in a lot better way though 😭

clive is pretty soft spoken. i feel he really keeps to himself more than anything. very introverted. loves his books and his poetry and his classics