trying to get skinny

Chapter 1- Symptoms

Dizziness: this is most likely caused by low iron. you can take an iron supplement to help you in the long run. these take a few months to begin working, so you won't immediately see an improvement. they don't help too much in general, if i'm being honest. this can also be caused by lack of electrolytes. the best way to absorb these is by gatorade or liquid iv. there are a number of calories in both of these, but i find that these do not affect my weight in any way. they are also low enough that your body will naturally burn it off anyways. one thing that a lot of rexxys often suffer from is extreme dizziness upon standing. everytime i would stand up, especially during a long fast, i would get so dizzy my vision would go black. a good way to help this is to slowly stand up, take as much time as you need to, even if it feels silly.

- Hair loss: hair loss is caused by a lack of nutrition in your body. when i was at my lowest weight, my hair got really thin and was falling out like crazy. i would have so much come out when i was showering, brushing my hair, or pulling it up. there isn't too much you can do to prevent this from happening. to not receive any sort of suspicion from this, pulling your hair into a bun, ponytail, or plaits is best. i found that people typically don't notice too much, but if they do you can play it off usually.

Sick/nausea: i'm not entirely sure what the cause of this is. i know that so so many people with eds suffer from almost chronic nausea. a lot of people have told me nicotine helps them with this. a lot of times after you eat anything, it's common to feel like this. a peppermint stick is very helpful in my opinion. they're little sticks with essential oils in them. you can buy them from amazon for 5-10 dollars and carry it around with you in a purse or pocket.

Brain Fog: there's truly nothing that works for this. it's the price to pay with being skinny. your brain doesn't have anything to run off of. if people begin to notice this, saying your sleep schedule has been off is super helpful. this symptom will most likely affect your grades, which is one factor to pay attention to. sleep is very important to help minimize this. getting enough sleep will do so much more than you may realize.

Fainting: at some point, you may faint. it's important to check for bruising, swelling, and other injuries after. if you feel this sensation coming up, try to sit down or lean against something to prevent as much pain as possible. often, carbs or protein bars/shakes can help reduce this too. obviously, this idea is not ideal. i see it as a small price to pay to protect this secret.

Fasting & Starving- Tips/Tricks

I usually begin my fasts around 6 or 7 pm. I have my OMAD (one meal a day) at this time. This time works best for me because I leave my house before 7am for school, which makes skipping breakfast easy. then, at school i treat my lunch period as a study hall. the real challenge is when i get home and trying not to binge.

My favorite techniques for when i feel the urge to binge are mukbangs, thinspo, meanspo, writing, nicotine, gum, water loading, and distracting my mind. mukbangs help because they make me sick to my stomach when they're eating thousands of calories and being really messy, so it takes away my appetite. i have an entire pinterest board of thinspo to remind myself why this discomfort will be worth it to look like this girls. meanspo is usually best when given to you from another person. tumblr is a great space for that, if you create a post asking for meanspo then somebody will respond. or find an anabuddy and give each other meanspo/anything else needed. writing helps because i can gather my thoughts and find the reasoning behind starving myself again. nicotine helps because it distracts your mouth. gum does the same. water loading is basically chugging a whole bunch of water. this fills me up and usually leaves me feeling a little sick. coloring or drawing, especially ed related things, helps to put my mind's attention on something other than the sensation of starvation.

If somebody notices you're not eating enough, it truly depends on the person who's asking. before recovery, i would tell my mom i just forgot or i was simply feeling sick with a headache or flu. my friends i would just tell them i already ate/am eating later. same works for most other people. now if you are supposed to be recovered, it's easiest to break whatever fast you have going and eat a regular or semi-regular meal in front of your parents. this is so much easier than being forced to gain all of the weight back.

Suggestions?

I will be making a few more parts to this. if there is any information or questions you'd like answered on the next one, comment them.

I'm also going to start an 4n4 community group chat on snapchat. i understand that this goes against the protecting identities card, but discord takes down the servers. in order to keep the chat hidden, it will be names t-rexxies and the dinosaur emoji. that is more of an esoteric and discreet name in my opinion. again, dm me or comment any suggestions for this. if you would like to be added to this, please comment or dm me. all invitations/usernames will be sent via direct messages to protect this blog as much as possible.

thank you for all the love and support. you're doing so amazing. keep going, i know you can do it.

xoxo,