Cheese Enthusiast

Woke up at 3 am delirious and extremely thirsty but my water glass was empty so I was like “I know exactly how to fix this” So I googled “big water” and in my half asleep state I was certain that would allow me to manifest a large glass of water in reality. Didn’t work but now I know there’s a town in Utah called Big Water.

I had to reblog this as soon as I stopped laughing

@spacekristin

Someone please quickly explain baby clothing sizes to me

baby clothes are smaller than most adult or even childrens clothes. i hope this helps

Ok mando + duel of the fates absolutely fucks

@spacekristin

someone is trying to convince me that the name ‘glen’ is short for ‘glenjamin’ and i cant stop laughing

“...he made a leap year joke about how Julius Caesar became such a “powerful maniac” that he was stabbed to death by senators — after which Mulaney told the SNL audience, “That would be an interesting thing if we brought that back now!” Mulaney revealed to Kimmel that that punchline earned him a rare accomplishment: a Secret Service investigation. “I guess they opened a file on me because of the joke, and I have to say: Am I stoked there’s a file open on me? Absolutely. Did I enjoy it in the moment? Not so much,”

Having a cat

“Call the cops like I give a fuck”

i LOVE the cryptid energy this gives off