My tumblr blog By: Amelia Smith

1. I kissed cigarettes instead of you on Valentines because you said that you never meant it when you told me that you loved me. 2. I woke up crying twice last night. Just come back, please. 3. My journal used to be about what went through my day and now I flip through my pages and all I can read is your name over and over and over and over again. 4. The vinyl shop I work in played your favorite album on the speakers. I tried not to cry while speaking to customers. 5. A boy in my French class walked past my table, I got a whiff of his cologne and almost passed out because he smelled exactly like you. 6. I accidentally called my crush by your name. I was so embarrassed but he smiled and kissed my cheek. 7.  I threw up my baguette and the color of your eyes out of the pits of my stomach in the school’s bathroom last Wednesday. 8. We haven’t talked for 5 months, this feels so weird. 9. I fucking hate you… I think.  10. You texted me at 2 am in the morning telling me you miss me, my heart sank to the bottom of the sheets, and I almost told you I missed you too but I was high in bed loving someone else.

I mean, I have the feeling that something in my mind is poisoning everything else.