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Devout

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oldphanny

So like... now what? Does Tumblr get deleted now? We beat the final boss [phan hard launch]

dan-tad

did you know public libraries are free and beautiful

doctor-doodleman

I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should lock the fuck in *half an hour passes* I should-

itsgonnabeanofrommedawg

dan and phil publicly forgiving their audience for ripping their private life apart. chronically closeted dan following that up by asking "phil do YOU forgive me for years of dealing with my bullshit?" and phil saying he doesn't need to forgive him. literally peace and love on phanet earth

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intensional

Anyone else not cut out for all this

paper-mario-wiki

Potatoes kind of went awff when they invented hash browns

look at this Perfect Potato Patty im grillin

superjacobworld

American behavior trying to turn everything into hamburger.

paper-mario-wiki

Tumblr user behavior trying to turn everything into something to be ashamed of.

vervainium

this didn’t deserve to be hidden in the tags

theshitpostcalligrapher

lmao

teaboot

Concept: Vampire character that represents strengthening ties to humanity and the natural world instead of dividing them

Vampire gets HEAVILY invested in eco conservation because they *can't* just shrug it off as the next generation's problems

A vampire that goes around eating oil tycoons and clear-cut logging CEOs and climate-denying politicians because their childhood village is a dirt pit now and the animals they saw growing up have become endangered

Immortal guys who anonymously donate huge sums of cash to wildlife preserves that oversee forests they used to hunt in

Fellow who, instead of succumbing to the boredom and waste of infinite time, has become feverishly obsessed with making sure this one specific species of snail will still be around in another hundred years

5000 year old woodsman who can still mimic the calls of extinct birds, who still remembers the mating calls of mammoths and wooly rhinos and wild horses

Ancient vampire who can still vaguely recall a cave somewhere with her whole family's hand prints in it, and not sure of it's precise location, keeps the whole area void of human activity so it doesn't become a tourist attraction

Vampire archeologist who digs up their old friend's remains and has the figure out how to prove, with evidence, how they know exactly who they were and what they looked like

Immortal anthropologist who reconstructs a face from a skull only to realize that they'd met them before a long, long time ago

homunculus-argument

Random linguistic worldbuilding: A language with six sets of pronouns, which are set by one's current state of existence. There's a separate pronoun for people who are alive, people who are dead, and potential future people who are yet to be born, and the ambiguous ones of "may or may not be alive or aleady dead", "may or may not have even been born yet", and the ultimate general/ambiguous all-covering one that covers all ambiguous states.

The culture has a specific defined term for that tragic span of time when a widow keeps accidentally referring to their spouse with living pronouns. New parents-to-be dropping the happy surprise news of a pregnancy by referring to their future child with the "is yet to be born" pronoun instead of a more ambiguous one and waiting for the "wait what did you just say?" reactions.

Someone jokingly referring to themselves with the dead person pronouns just to highlight how horrible their current hangover is. A notorious aspiring ladies' man who keeps trying to pursue women in their 20s despite of approaching middle age fails to notice the insult when someone asks him when he's planning to get married, and uses the pronoun that implies that his ideal future bride may not even be born yet.

A mother whose young adult child just moved away from home for the first time, who continues to dramatically refer to their child with "may or may not be already dead" until the aforementioned child replies to her on facebook like "ma stop telling people I'm dead" and having her respond with "well how could I possibly know that when you don't even write to us? >:,C"

sweatermuppet

"transfer fee" "starting fee" "convenience fee" "late fee" okay what if i beat you to a red pulp with a hammer what about that

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valtsv

i wish superpowers were real because then you'd get people making posts like "some people need to get real hobbies and stop making identical illusionary clones of themselves that your fist passes through like smoke when you go to punch them :/" and know exactly who the OP was talking about

valtsv

i also don't wish superpowers were real because i would be so pissed if i replied "mad because you fell for the illusion aren't you" and some guy with teleportation powers grabbed me and teleported me to the middle of the desert for ratioing him on twitter

valtsv

fuckadietcoke

Someone: how have you been doing?

Me, hanging on by a thread:

cumaeansibyl

I feel like I should just queue this to post once a week but at random times

fatsexybitch

Everytime this sucker pops out of my queue it's relevant

diaspora-transan

Video ID: Lil Nas X sits in a white tank top. Lil Nas makes coughing and "hnnn" noises while gesturing wildly, with many nods, shrugs, and looks of "oh boy". He gestures at his hair, the world around him, and the camera. He puts his hands on his hips, then says "it's been a lot of shit." [End ID]

feastofsnakes

[excessive citations]

ransomed

treesofgreen

westiec

today for me, tomorrow for you...

bewbin

hey you guys my friend just told me i have a stain on my shirt (embarrassing) and hes put his finger on the shirt to indicate where it is. Im gonna look down so i can asses the stain situation

bewbin

how could he

dct239394cvvd098dffgggp

he died in a wii remote recalibration accident

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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batzzzzz

Rool

citrusmillie

all tumbrlinas come from a common ancestor

catchymemes

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