I'm the Dean and don't you forget it

There wasn’t any question, Celia thought, that he was coming up with ideas — or at the very least, trying for the moment. If she knew Mike, he’d get distracted in the next ten minutes and wouldn’t think about it again until practically the last minute. It was a pattern, one she’d been aware of for years. And years.

"Strippers?!" Mike clutched to the side of the car when Gio turned the car around. Was he crazy?!?? The answer was an astounding, yes, and Mike found himself wondering why he had even agreed to get in Gio's car in the first place. Strippers were not a good idea. Even if he wasn't engaged, Mike was way too nervous around women to ever possibly enjoy himself.

Gio proceeded to drag him through the parking lot and up to his car. He didn’t like doing it, but he hated seeing Mike like this. “Nope, you’re not allowed to be alone in this state. Come on, I know a great place to eat.” He shoved him into the passenger seat, shut the door and went around to the driver’s side.

"Yeah, well, your worst is ten times better than my best," Mike mumbled as he lazily made a frowny face on the window with his finger. 

Mike oozed charm, as usual. It was really the charm that attracted her to him in the first place. He usually didn’t turn every head in a room or anything like that, because if Celia were being honest, he was probably one of the goofiest people she’d ever seen, especially with all his cheesy jokes and the faces he liked to make.

"You don't have to worry about me, Schmoopsie. There will be no weaseling out over here," he promised with a twinkle in his eyes. "I've already got the ol'e noggin thinking of ideas." While this was true, most of his ideas were much too expensive. Hiring a plane to spell out Celia's name in the sky might need to be put back in the vault for when he became the multi-millionaire he was destined to be one day. 

Gio sighed to himself, wondering how he could help his friend. He knew Mike had always wanted to be a comedian. “Look, Mike. This whole competition I made up for us was just a joke. Something fun to do. A little friendly competition never hurt anyone anyway, am I right?” He shrugged at Mike’s back. “Besides, you’re just as good as me. I didn’t care about winning, just about having f-” but when he turned around and saw the look on Mike’s face, he knew what he had to do. He walked back towards Mike as his friend started to leave. “Oh no, you don’t!” He grabbed Mike by the shoulders and lead him in the right direction. 

"Sure I like hotdogs," Mike answered knowing his parents wouldn't be pleased by that fact. Hotdogs were hardly kosher, but Mike had been happily eating bacon and lobster his whole adult life and there was no going back now. 

Gio watched backstage and laughed out loud at Mike’s jokes. He always thought Mike was funny and agreed with Celia that his jokes are great! For some reason, the audience didn’t laugh as much as Gio did which made him feel sorry for his dear friend. He really didn’t mean for Mike to lose. It was just a healthy dose of competition, right?

"Don't kid yourself, Gio," Mike said back, absentmindedly rubbing his head where he had been banging it. "I'm just not funny. Let's face it. You won fair and square, and I never should have thought I could do it." So what if he had spent practically his whole life wanting to be a comedian, even if it was just a hobby. 

Gio almost lost his balance when Mike shoved him towards the stage. “Alright, alright. No need to get pushy.” He straightened his jacket and walked on stage with just himself, no notes required. Gio felt ready and started off his segment by talking to the audience about the state of the country, what’s been happening in the news and comparing it to other things, making jokes about it. He got a few good laughs out of it.

Mike felt his stage freight rise as Gio got more and more laughs. Maybe I should have gone first. How could he follow this act?? This whole thing was a big mistake. Who did he think he was?! He was a hack, a nobody, a nothing!! His jokes weren't funny no matter how much Celia said they were. Mike's style of humor wasn't as loud or as fast as Gio's, how was he even going to compete?

Ladies first? "Well, in that case," Mike stepped aside and pushed Gio out towards the stage. "Looks like you're up."

Nine years was a long time, as Celia very frequently reminded him. Mike tugged at the collar of this shirt and locked up the car. "Well, uh.. I guess it's partly my fault," he confessed. Roger would understand, right? They were both guys so Roger couldn't possibly blame him like some of Celia's friends did. 

Millicent sneered at the mats already provided and unrolled her own yoga mat, muttering about how she’d rather be struck down by a bus before she shared a sweaty mat with someone else. She was in the middle of stretching when some fool who had plopped down into her personal space had the audacity to speak to her. If this had been any ordinary idiot, she would have just ignored him and gone about her day, but luckily she happened to catch his face reflecting in the mirror in front of her.

Well well well. Mike straightened up and put on his best smirk. It was so nice to be recognized outside of campus. I do make a spectacular dean. Why shouldn't I be recognized? Just as he was about to say something smooth back to her (of course we all know that it would really be the opposite of smooth but yeah) Mike in turn recognized the woman he was talking to. 

Let's Hit the Gym || Open

Alright. Mike had his new sweatpants, sweatshirt, and to top it all off a bright green headband wrapped around his forehead. He looked very official which he felt like he needed to do considering he hadn't stepped foot inside a gym since high school. Even thinking about high school gym made him want to hide forever, but that was not going to happen today! No sir! He was going to get back into shape. Or rather, get in a shape that wasn't so.. round.

"Drag?" For a moment Mike imagined himself dressed up in one of Celia's little black dresses, complete with shoes, hat and purse. She would have his hide if he did that. Not to mention she'd be more angry once she learned it was because he had bet and lost. "Fine!" Mike heartily shook Gio's hand sealing the bet.