Knook

I think it’s about time someone writes an epic poem about DashCon, complete with an invocation of the Muses, in media res, epic catalogues—you know, every hallmark of epic poetry. I would read the shit out of it.

Alvin and the Chipmunks was just nightcore for baby boomers

X-Men? Congrats on their transitions

A second Pontiff has hit the Apostolic Palace, the Vatican is under attack.

One time I was talking to a friend about musicals and I accidentally called Moulin Rouge Baton Rouge, like the capital of Louisiana. I still think about that sometimes.

Instead of electing a president, maybe we should just put candidates in the thunderdome from Mad Max. Two men enter, one man leaves.

I want the epitaph on my headstone to be written in comic sans.

I bet the Vikings were listening to some corny ass, divorced dad shit on the way to Lindisfarne, like “Björn to Be Wild”.