Devil's eyes

Since months now- Gage? Seriously?

I haven't heard! It's not like we talk everyday! 

My last day in this fucking town for quite some time.

What!? Since when?

It’s strange to think tomorrow is it.

Tomorrow is what?

I haven’t heard enough people talking about it around here though. Well, my parents are actually excited. Sometimes they force me to watch the matches which is fucking terrible.

You lucky deaf fucker. All I hear is shit about teams and 'oh how the hell did stinky mcshitpants miss that goal' and ' Mister McHotshot  totally didn't deserve that foul' and I want to fucking punch something. 

Indeed you are Gage. Well, maybe you should try it out. Could help the internet for god knows what other dumb things they say ‘bout shit.

That's true, I'd be teaching the poor idiotic souls that dwell. Maybe I'll even become iconic and people will learn and stop being dumb shits.

Amazin’. A small human with as much rage as a sumo wrestler, it’s fantastic. Hmm, thats true. You could get your cousin to help you right? Or I think its your cousin? 

I'm just a fucking miracle of rage. Yeah, I guess Az could help me, it's a good idea, if I cared enough to do it.

World Cup? Do people around here even give a shit about that?

Yes. It's a world wide fucking thing.

Oh Gage, you need to be president or some shit. You’d be great. Or maybe a spokes person for the internet, that’d be intrestin’. Didn’t know those were such a topic that you hated. Although, all of it is a pretty valid point.

My whole being was formed out of hate for stupid shit, let me tell you. Maybe I'll become a person who rants on the internet, if only I knew how the fucking internet worked or I could use a computer.

Aww poor Gage. Very sorry to hear about your hate for the world. Tell me, what are the other major parts of this burning passion of hate?

I hate twinkies a lot and how America doesn't have plastic money because money feels so nasty. I hate how the weather is so bipolar and people can't make up their fucking mind if Pluto is a fucking planet or not. Also, what the fuck is wrong with Crocs? They are comfy shit, people need to stop hating it just because they may look like shit.

Yeah, it’s fucking stupid to get angry over some shit, but if you like it I guess it can be understandable. 

I don't understand at all.

Why do you say that babe?

Because it's true, dumbbutt.

Sorry, had to! You just look really done with me talkin’ bout it. The sarcastic comments are quite in order today, do you just really hate sports?

Uh huh. I hate the world, the sports hype is just a major part of it.

It’s not a shit excuse. I don’t understand why you’re bashing something just because you don’t like it. And the world isn’t dumb, Gage. Find food.

Everyone gets so fucking obsessed and that's all they fucking care about and you know fucking what Casper, I don't get any of it because I can't seem to get why a fuck ton of people want to watch other's display physical and coordinational talent just for shits and giggles! Do you know how fucking expensive sports can be? There's so many other fucking things that that money could be put towards and they spend it on entertaining themselves. I get low level sports, okay fun shit but these grand displays of who the hell is better, that shit doesn't make any fucking sense. And I fucking will.

I don’t know.. the idea of sports is nice, I just think it’s weird how seriously people take it.

It's stupid.

Innit? So what’s gone and crawled up your butt today? Don’t bash the athletic enthusiasts.

I hate how the sports take over everything. I don't fucking like it at all. And there's nothing up my butt, excuse you.

I only like baseball. And that’s because I used to play it.

You know, someone else told me 'that's because I play it' past tense or now that's still a shit excuse. All sports are dumb and you're dumb. The world is dumb. I'm hungry.

Yes, of course, goals for you then!

Oh ha, sports reference, very funny.