The Awkward Turtle

i go absolutely ape shit buck wild when people ask me if i want to run errands with them like Let’s Fucking Go. and my mind absolutely maxes out of dopamine when they ask if i wanna stop for coffee. and if someone took me to the park id go bonkers in funcking yonkers

i got so high last night that i started ghostwriting for a golden retriever apparently

do tumbleweeds actually blow around in the southwest or is that a myth…?

That is ten times more fucked up than I thought. They plant themselves again? That’s neat. I always thought they were just dead leaves and twigs in a bunch.

I like this. Tumbleweeds just fuck off when they don’t like a place, they are not like other plants who have to respect your plant rules, they are rebels.

@diskothiqueer

Drift round that bitch

I don’t know about human surgeons, but that’s a suture pattern I use to close skin all the time and you can see why.

I forgot vets existed for a moment and that comment made me wonder what Cryptid had gotten a doctorate and was performing surgery.

i can’t wait to wear this great fashion combo to school