atp & ink

I started working a second job to clear up as much random debt as I can before starting my masters in the fall. It’s taken away all of the energy I had to study for the MCAT, so that’s not happening this year and I’m okay with that. I want to do well on the test and I need more time to complete concept review anyway. Working one job and studying for that test is grueling. I wish I knew more people doing it.

Worrying about money was killing my motivation, so I’m doing the adult thing and taking a break. I think not studying for a few months before starting grad school will be healthier for me anyway.

At the same time, I’m terrified of taking out more money for school. I have to excel in the program or it will just be a waste, and I’ll be in more debt. I already feel siloed in my career, I can’t imagine what else I’d do with the second degree. I want to say medical/technical writing, but the thought of starting at entry level for anything else makes me want to be sick.

Everytime I see a “studying is a privilege” reel on Instagram I’m instantly triggered. Those of us who know that really know that.

most days having a full-time job, an hour long commute, and wanting to take the MCAT is such a frustrating and seemingly unrealistic desire.

333: 💫

As I’ve started engaging the material differently, I’ve learned so much more during my MCAT HOURS. I now make better associations between the concepts, and have faster recall the following days.

Slow Monday and Tuesday

This week has been so low energy. Thanksgiving inspired overindulgence and the aftermath is staying up late, sleeping through alarms, trying to squeeze physics in before an unpredictable commute, power walking late into work— and then work always bleeds into the next day because I’m in a two-man operation.

Hump Day

Wednesday is for the reset. I haven’t been acting right, let’s finish the week strong. So I am sitting here writing this blog post in the midst of a study session (YIKES, but once I'm done its back to work AND I will only post this after as a reward ;)).... Anways, I’m very committed to reaching 80 focus hours this month, even if it means a productive late night or two. If I reach this goal I’ll be so impressed with myself. I’ve always liked a challenge, for real. Just sitting at about 77 hours is good enough— it shows that I’ve been workin’ it out.

I’ve been daydreaming about the days I’d be flipping through textbooks and working problems and I am finally in this energy of wanting to accomplish all of my goals NOW, not “when the time is right”. I'm really out here like, "the time is now", and I’ve been manifesting this drive and discipline so I WON’T WASTE IT.

Desired Improvements for Thursday and Friday

At work I am going to wrap up my internal audit, complete all of my data review assignments, and review any outstanding documents in my email.

In my MCAT HOURS I am going to keep up the good fight with miledown’s and my own OD Anki decks. I’m also going to finish reading and taking notes on chapter 6 of the Kaplan Physics & Math workbook, and then I am going to dig into chapter 7 by the weekend.

I won’t be finishing the book by the end of the month. I won’t likely be finishing the set of books by the end of the year (unless…), but I am taking a full length diagnostic on 12/31/2023 REGARDLESS.

I can’t wait to see my score! This is the longest and most consistent effort I’ve put into the MCAT since I graduated in 2019. I’m anxious to see where all of this hard work has landed me on the 528 scale.

11/25/2023: Physics: Electrostatics and Magnetism